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Old 10-25-2012, 01:27 AM
 
4,043 posts, read 3,773,496 times
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I actually don't think I'm needy, but like everyone else, I need love and I think I've always lacked love in my immediate family, and that transferred over into my friendships and makes me a very confused candidate for dating.

My schedule is pretty full and filled, and most times I find my life exciting. But it's tough when I come home to a loveless environment (still with my parents because I'm pathetic and they guilt trip me into staying). I think most people feel like this, but I feel like there's a void in my life when I don't have a loved one to come home to and tell my day about. Most of the time I just like to tell them silly things that happened to me, but some times it's nice to just have someone to hear you whine and complain and to give you a hug and cuddle.

Yes, I need love, but the strange part is I'm also afraid of it. I know there are guys who would love to have a serious relationship with me and would want to do all those things I mentioned above. But I always go by what my heart feels, and so far, it's only felt right with one man. I can't be with someone just to be with someone. And even if they fit into all these criteria of what I want in a man, that isn't even enough. It's just that with my second bf, everything felt so right. It wasn't perfect by any means, but I loved every moment of it, and I actually loved it in its imperfection and its tough times. I just thought it was beautifully imperfect, it felt so real and human. Any time a man tries to be my "prince charming", I am skeptical of him. I guess he just knew how to handle women and he knew what to say and what to do at specific moments and he was just genuine in every situation even when he didn't tell me the whole truth. And now I find myself feeling the need to jump from guy to guy to fill this void of someone I am madly in love with but can't be with. And not because he's a jerk or that he doesn't love me back. Our feelings are mutual, but our reasons for not being able to be together are also mutual (career of course!).

I'm even considering online dating just to distract myself. I have enough things to keep me busy, and I mean I am BUSY. I am constantly going from one place to another with no breathing room and barely any time to eat sometimes. But I always find the time to think about him and it's killing me. He welcomes me to contact him and he enjoys talking to me, but I just feel like that's a cop out for not dealing with the pain and reality of the breakup. But this constant neediness to fill this void is also pathetic... it doesn't feel real with other men and it wouldn't be right because they would just be his replacement... but it is also nice to get attention and having love is always nice.
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Old 10-25-2012, 03:17 AM
 
4,078 posts, read 5,414,746 times
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You find yourself wanting to jump into a relationship, yet you are emotionally unready.

Feelings about your ex, if they're still lingering, will be another self-fulfilling prophecy for failed romance if you don't resolve your memories over the break-up.

Void is like emotional dead weight you carry around. People may feel it, you may not see it, but it's there. Sorta like when you meet new people, they're there but not quite there, because you're not.

Break-up is a perfect time to take care of yourself and really re-vitalize to pamper yourself!
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