Question to The Ladies Here (male, gay, friends, definition)
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Isn't everyone "unique" nowadays? Everyone likes to think they have an edge, that they are a special little snowflake. You see it all the time, from college applications to job resumes to dating profiles.
Brings to mind a quote I really like: "I'm unique...just like everyone else."
Quote:
Originally Posted by brahmabull117
What do you guys mean when you say you want somebody with a great personality?
Are you talking about being very confident and a smooth talker? Or do you just mean somebody who is extremely nice to you who treats you the right way without being insecure or clingy in any way? IE a guy who can make you feel like he genuinely cares about you? Or is it a combination of the 2?
Confident, yes, but definitely not a smooth talker. Like others have said, that brings to mind someone who is swarmy or makes you wonder what angle they are trying to work. For me, it's someone who is nice to me and to others, treats me right, makes me feel he cares about me, makes me think, I have common interests with and makes me laugh. My sense of humor is naturally a central part of my personality (except I cannot for the life of me be funny if I try) so I definitely wouldn't mesh with someone who doesn't get that aspect of me or vice versa.
I'm definitely more drawn to the dreaded white knight who recognizes I'm my own person than the caveman. I really don't appreciate being drug around by my hair or told my own mind.
What do you mean? So advice like, "just be a gentleman, buy her nice things and treat her like a princess", isnt what all women want from guys?
No, it isn't. I don't want a guy "treating me like a princess". And when you're trying to get a woman's attention, and are in the initial dating phase, buying her stuff would backfire. This is cr@p advice. Who invented this "princess" cr@p, anyway--Disney? You've been tuning into the wrong channel.
Not that I disagree with you Jade..but that last bit got me thinking.
Isn't everyone "unique" nowadays? Everyone likes to think they have an edge, that they are a special little snowflake. You see it all the time, from college applications to job resumes to dating profiles.
-Likes outdoors, and hiking. I mean seriously, did we expect you to say, that you ****ing hate the outdoors?
-Can bring a fresh and innovative game plan to this company/college. Please...you and five thousand applicants from Mumbai.
-Likes to do faux quirky things, like playing the banjo, or the accordion, not because they like it but because it makes them hip. Also- thick square framed glasses and retro headphones.
-Engaged politically. It means he/she posted on facebook about poverty once five years ago, and sometimes likes to shout outside government buildings holding signs with a group of a few dozen others.
Truth is, most people are not special...if they were, then the very word average, and median, and majority and minority would lose their meanings. Statisticians and social scientists would be out of a job, as it were.
Sorry that was a rant that didn't have to do with the OP, just a pet peeve of mine.
Was that a joke? (It was in reference to being treated like a princess.) I can't tell.
Well it really depends on which form princess takes.
For some posters, princes means being chivalrous and opening the door. For other people means being attentive. And for other people it means you know saving the day and all other sorts of nonsense.
So for the nonsense form, committed in the case of you should be in a mental institution.
But in reality, I mostly meant when you are actually dating, and not the first 10 minutes.
Well it really depends on which form princess takes.
For some posters, princes means being chivalrous and opening the door. For other people means being attentive. And for other people it means you know saving the day and all other sorts of nonsense.
So for the nonsense form, committed in the case of you should be in a mental institution.
But in reality, I mostly meant when you are actually dating, and not the first 10 minutes.
I like chivalry. I've got my own preferences on attentiveness. But I am not the princess type, but other people may want that. But typically not right up front.
OP: my definition for demonstrating care is around being 100% there when we are spending time together and remembering my interests (and things I have shared).
Ive had plenty of girls tell me to my face that they love to be spoiled. Thats a cue for me to turn around and walk away. And Ruth, you may associate princess concept with Disney chanel, but did you ever stop to think who Disney chanel caters to? Thats right, kids. Same kids who grow up all their youth while watching disney chanel and playing super mario brothers, listening to folk tales and folk songs and terrible advice from their family members and freinds. All those things tell a young man that he must save the world, do something great, beat up the bad guys, invent something new or have a great career, in order to find his princess. Is it any wonder then, that we have so many young guys growing up to be white knights and completely clueless as to how to attract women?
Who said white knights are clueless as to how to attract women? A lot of white knights are married.
I agree: a lot of Disney is poison.
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