Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yeah - I did try! I also tried to make him see a doctor or something but he never did.
And like I said - some of my girlfriends have been through this, too. Not all guys have crazy sex drives. And as women - we are sort of taught that if a guy finds us attractive - he wants to bang us all the time. So when you are with someone that doesn't have a high sex drive and he doesn't want to bang you all the time - you start feeling like something is wrong with you. It's not. But it's hard to remember that.
ya, I have a hard time remembering that. I'm used to guys with sky rocketly high sex drives.
Ruth-I messaged you about him but I haven't posted about him much, certainly never created a thread on any issues with him.
I'm the woman in this scenario and my boyfriend is healthy (he goes to the gym 5 times a week) and far too young for this problem (late 20's). I don't know what to do and we've only been together going on 6 months. I tried the sexy/dirty talk, sexy flirting, etc. and it hasn't helped. I'm scared to try sexy lingerie because I'm afraid it won't work and that's a lot of money to waste on something that won't work. One day when I went to playfully grab his package, he pushed me away for the millionth time, I called him out on it and he felt really sorry but the frequency that we do it hasn't changed.
When we do have sex, its great...I just wish it was more than once a week/every other week (and that he initiated much more)..grrr. He treats me very well other wise and does well with communication on iffy topics and is affectionate, but to be honest, I find myself from to time questioning my attractiveness to him because of this. On top of it, I have to initiate most times, if I want any, which is something completely new to me. I've never had this problem in any relationship before. I do realize I need to talk to him of course but tonight, I know he could tell I was upset and just said he'll make it up to me . I know relationships arent' all about sex but its almost as important as the other things, which are great in our relationship, and is why this is so conflicting for me. I don't want to leave him before anyone even dares to bring that up. I just want to fix this problem.
The only solution here is to bang Captain Jack asap.
Well welcome to the word of exceptions. Look I don't think your boyfriend has a low sex drive its just not the same as yours. Despite what most men and women and internet may tell you all of us guys are not walking hard ons wanting to bone at a notice moment.
At best its better to talk to him and tell him you would like him to initiate more. Also is there anything going on in his life anything stress inducing.
The only stressful thing I can think of is he has an estranged relationship with his father and he has been trying to get to him through me but his father lives on the otherside of the country so I can't see it interfering with his drive but who knows.
I had exactly the same thing in my last relationship, yet another reason why we weren't meant to be together.
I tried everything you've said, even sexy lingerie, and it worked occasionally but most of the time I was so worried about being rejected (for the millionth time) that I didn't bother anymore. Talking was useless, he'd just get mad. Oh well. No longer my problem.
It's really hard on the self-esteem to get turned down all the time, especially when in my case it wasn't always done in the most polite way.
So depressing . At least my boyfriend is nice about it when he turns me down but its just too often.
Tell him to stop going to that stupid gym. There are woman with this problem also- They are so body conscious that they go to the gym..6 days a week and wonder why they have deminished the drive. The other thing...If you do not think about sex -sex will not come..The other alternative is sneak up on your man and gently perform oral on him...This will get his mind in the right place...Once he is geared up and properly heated...Have him take over and do his duty...Sex comes from the mind...and sometimes the mind needs a bit of reminding.
Tell him to stop going to that stupid gym. There are woman with this problem also- They are so body conscious that they go to the gym..6 days a week and wonder why they have deminished the drive. The other thing...If you do not think about sex -sex will not come..The other alternative is sneak up on your man and gently perform oral on him...This will get his mind in the right place...Once he is geared up and properly heated...Have him take over and do his duty...Sex comes from the mind...and sometimes the mind needs a bit of reminding.
Oh god..he would never quit the gym. He would equate it to him asking me to quit dancing.
The only stressful thing I can think of is he has an estranged relationship with his father and he has been trying to get to him through me but his father lives on the otherside of the country so I can't see it interfering with his drive but who knows.
Well I think there is nothing interfering with his drive in your last post you said your used to guys wanting it all the time.
Like Dew said just because he doesn't want to bang you 24/7 doesn't mean he doesn't care for you.
Well I think there is nothing interfering with his drive in your last post you said your used to guys wanting it all the time.
Like Dew said just because he doesn't want to bang you 24/7 doesn't mean he doesn't care for you.
Exactly and ya I never said he doesn't care about me just cause his drive is low. Its just frustrating and tonight, it hurt my feelings especially since its been 3 weeks cause we were both sick.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
. I know relationships arent' all about sex but its almost as important as the other things, which are great in our relationship, and is why this is so conflicting for me. I don't want to leave him before anyone even dares to bring that up. I just want to fix this problem.
. At least my boyfriend is nice about it when he turns me down but its just too often.
