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Old 01-09-2013, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Madison, WI
79 posts, read 96,047 times
Reputation: 91

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That seems to be the gist of the whole "Cold Approaching Women" thread.

The impression i get is that the most attractive women (top 10% or so) are sick of being approached left and right. At first perhaps they find it flattering, but after awhile, they just want to be left alone.

Whereas average looking woman who get approached less frequently generally are not annoyed by it, so long as the guy is polite.

Maybe guys should stop approaching the most attractive women. I'm sure if a super attractive woman is interested in a guy, she'll have no problem letting him know. Unless you are an adonis yourself, i get the impression that a super attractive woman would prefer to be left alone.

Maybe we should stick to approaching average-looking women who are more likely to enjoy the occasional flirtation. If the extremely attractive women don't want to be approached, why approach them? It's just going to annoy the woman, and leave the guy feeling rejected. It's a lose for both.

Anyway, just wanted to see what the extremely attractive ladies think here.
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Old 01-09-2013, 04:40 PM
 
Location: CT
245 posts, read 517,973 times
Reputation: 209
I don't consider myself extremely attractive. I don't get approached like normal girls.

No, "Hey babies" for me. I wish I could get that...

I get followed, cars slowing down, and watched. I went to TGIF's with my parents once, and some random guy who said he's seen me before comes up to our table to say hi. My dad asked who he was, and I couldn't even answer that. Then I got lectured how I need to watch my surroundings more...


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Old 01-09-2013, 04:44 PM
 
10,029 posts, read 10,857,980 times
Reputation: 5945
I am attractive but am older now so don't get approached as much but still do sometimes. When I was younger (and lived closer to the city, which makes a difference)I was approached ALL THE TIME. It got annoying because while sometimes it was to tell me how hot I was, other times it was about being creepy such as asking me personal questions. Because I have a large chest this seem to bring out the creepiest guys. No, most of them are not guys I'd date.
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Old 01-09-2013, 04:56 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,536,044 times
Reputation: 16394
I get cat calls and lewd comments a lot...does that count?

I think a lot of men (not all, mind you) *think* that women who would rate 8-10 on the attractiveness chart ARE the average ones because those are simply the only ones they notice, therefore the only ones they approach. I've talked to guys that swear up and down that they only hit on average to below average women but when we're out together they are only hitting on the hottest women they see and completely ignoring the actual average women.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:01 PM
 
Location: In the city
1,581 posts, read 3,838,612 times
Reputation: 2417
I hesitate to respond because I don't want to say "YES I AM SUPER ATTRACTIVE!" as I think its all in the eye of the beholder. But I get approached all the time and have some thoughts about this, so I will weigh in.

First, a woman doesn't have to be in the "top 10%" to get approached all the time. When I lived in DC, we had a huge problem with street harrasment, especially in the summer. If you were identifiable as female, you were targeted. It was really irritating and sometimes I hated leaving the house to run to the corner grocery. It was disrespectful and incredibly sexist.

Now, if I am standing in line at Starbucks and someone starts to chat with me, I don't mind at all. Sometimes, men are just friendly, but often I know that an attempt at getting a number is coming. I try to be unfailingly polite to people though there are days when I just don't want to deal with it. I pull out the Ipod when that happens, smile vaguely and pretend I can't hear anything but music. I have had guys tap me on the shoulder to try and make conversation. I will take my earbuds out, and because I think this is incredibly pushy, I will respond to one question and say "you know, I am really enjoying this music. I am going to go back to listening to it. It was nice to meet you."

Certain times, people get aggressive. I was walking through my neighborhood once and a guy came up with a "can I talk to you?" line. I said, "sorry, I am in a hurry." and he just kept following and barraging me with questions. When I said "I am married" (which was untrue) he said " i don't see your ring." I told him firmly to leave me alone, and that I wasn't interested, walked faster and got my phone ready to dial. He got the picture, but really, does it have to come to that? Why pursue someone in conversation who is actively trying to get away from you? Are there really people out there who like this?
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:02 PM
 
1,636 posts, read 3,152,613 times
Reputation: 2747
I consider myself above average on the attractive scale. I don't mind attention whatsoever, but it does make me uncomfortable when I get whistled at and when men won't take the hint that I want to be left alone. I do more than hint. I tell them I'm not interested, and I've had several men in public keep talking and insisting. It makes me VERY uncomfortable, especially given that I'm alone a lot since I travel for work.

I hate it when I'm out jogging and get whistled or honked at. I've also had cars match my jogging pace next to me in the road. That actually makes me want to vomit in fear. This happens in broad daylight.

I just don't think men realize how scared they make us feel sometimes.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:17 PM
 
Location: North of 60
1,452 posts, read 2,035,056 times
Reputation: 1864
Just look like a b*tch and then you won't have this issue. Nor will you get bothered by panhandlers.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:19 PM
 
1,636 posts, read 3,152,613 times
Reputation: 2747
Quote:
Originally Posted by kimbo28 View Post
Just look like a b*tch and then you won't have this issue. Nor will you get bothered by panhandlers.
Haha, the funny thing is that when I'm out at bars or any social event that involves drinking or people trying to pick each other up, I make it a point to stick close to a male friend and to look extremely angry and unapproachable. It usually works.

However, out jogging I'm really minding my own business as much as possible. Not much I can do there. Kind of why I prefer jogging when the sun starts to set.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:26 PM
 
Location: In the city
1,581 posts, read 3,838,612 times
Reputation: 2417
Quote:
Originally Posted by lmw36 View Post
I consider myself above average on the attractive scale. I don't mind attention whatsoever, but it does make me uncomfortable when I get whistled at and when men won't take the hint that I want to be left alone. I do more than hint. I tell them I'm not interested, and I've had several men in public keep talking and insisting. It makes me VERY uncomfortable, especially given that I'm alone a lot since I travel for work.

I hate it when I'm out jogging and get whistled or honked at. I've also had cars match my jogging pace next to me in the road. That actually makes me want to vomit in fear. This happens in broad daylight.

I just don't think men realize how scared they make us feel sometimes.

I have gotten frightened only on a few occasions-- mostly I just think its rude. I honestly wonder about the people that do this aggresively-- do they not have moms or sisters? How would they react if someone tried to approach a woman they were related to like this? Its just common decency.

Once, ages ago, I was coming home from a nightclub and living in not so great a part of town. My boyfriend dropped me off and I had a guy RUN across the street to try and wedge his foot into my door so he could get into my building behind me. That was truly frightening and I called the cops. I also broke up with the guy who dropped me off. If you can't wait to see someone safely inside, you aren't worth dating.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:29 PM
 
Location: North of 60
1,452 posts, read 2,035,056 times
Reputation: 1864
It's really simple to get rid of guys that are in hot pursuit if you're not interested, I'm not really sure why girls complain about it like it's some major issue...

Honestly, if you don't like the attention and want a guy to never talk to you again, simply say: "Earlier today I gambled on a fart... and lost." He'll stop talking to you instantly. Situation handled.
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