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Old 01-15-2013, 07:50 PM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,345,998 times
Reputation: 9451

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I can feel my interest level fading away due to this girl taking hours to respond my texts and contacts me every 5 days. So I want to make it easy for her and ask......

"Are you dating someone right now? Because if so I can stop contacting you"


I really hope she gives me a honest answer because I just can deal with a "inactive friendship" right now and see no point in having her number in my phone if we only talk once a week and have yet to see each other face to face. So I do plan to ask her this on the phone and not over text. And I hope she can be honest so I can just move forward with my life.


The Latest thing that she did was respond to a text I sent after I called her and I said......."Just saying hi and wanted to talk briefly, call you later"

Her response was..........."Hello" instead of......."Hello how are you?. So not going to play around anymore.
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Old 01-15-2013, 07:58 PM
Status: "Beach time!" (set 27 days ago)
 
Location: Fredericksburg/Virginia Beach, VA
10,701 posts, read 11,102,931 times
Reputation: 14035
How much time do you spend with her in person? How much of your contact with her is limited to texting and phone calls? When you are with her does she receive a text and respond right away? Or do you not notice at all? It could be that she just doesn't pay close attention and takes a long time to reply.

If you do ask her that, be prepared for it to end either way. She may not take too kindly to the motive behind the question (lack of trust) and decide to move on. Proceed with caution.
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:00 PM
 
14,445 posts, read 17,389,188 times
Reputation: 11240
Wait, is this long distance?

It's fine that she just said "Hello" in response, but perhaps she is just not attentive enough for you overall. Not communicating frequently with a BF would bother me too.
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:04 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,906 posts, read 36,360,192 times
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Sure, I think most women would be honest about dating someone else. However, if she answers, "No, just you," that doesn't solve what's bothering you, which is that she's not as responsive as you like.
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:13 PM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,345,998 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
Wait, is this long distance?

It's fine that she just said "Hello" in response, but perhaps she is just not attentive enough for you overall. Not communicating frequently with a BF would bother me too.
She is not a girlfriend, we went out on 5 dates and we stopped talking for a year. So I ran into her again and then she invited me to come meet her at the bar while she was with her girlfriend. I told her no because it was too last minute and seems like things were not the same since then.

And she is not long distance. And I don't need to talk everyday but do want to talk atleast 2 or 3 times a week. Not once a week which is mostly texting and one phone call. So I rather just put my energy on someone because I never been a fan "Inactive friendships"
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:16 PM
FBJ FBJ started this thread
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 50,345,998 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
Sure, I think most women would be honest about dating someone else. However, if she answers, "No, just you," that doesn't solve what's bothering you, which is that she's not as responsive as you like.

In 2011 when we went out five times she always called me and vice versa so now I'm not feeling the same interest. And I did stop talking to her for a entire year so if she is interested in someone else that's completely understandable. So it's not a frustration thing just rather not continue to contact someone who has inconsistent contacts
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:17 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,898 posts, read 70,695,524 times
Reputation: 76855
Quote:
Originally Posted by iknowftbll View Post
How much time do you spend with her in person?.
He said they've never met face-to-face.

OP, I think it's a very fair question that's likely to get a straightforward answer, under the circumstances.
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:21 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,906 posts, read 36,360,192 times
Reputation: 42509
Quote:
Originally Posted by TVandSportsGuy View Post
In 2011 when we went out five times she always called me and vice versa so now I'm not feeling the same interest. And I did stop talking to her for a entire year so if she is interested in someone else that's completely understandable. So it's not a frustration thing just rather not continue to contact someone who has inconsistent contacts
Hmm. There might not be anyone else in the picture. She might just be busy and not that into you at the moment. People who take a long time to respond irritate me too.
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:23 PM
Status: "Beach time!" (set 27 days ago)
 
Location: Fredericksburg/Virginia Beach, VA
10,701 posts, read 11,102,931 times
Reputation: 14035
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
He said they've never met face-to-face.
whoops...hehe
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Old 01-15-2013, 08:25 PM
 
1,133 posts, read 1,914,289 times
Reputation: 1239
JJ's spot on. Your question will lead to 2 answers:

A) Girl who is already seeing someone else and not interested in you
B) Girl who is not seeing anyone but shows no interest in you

Either answer sucks. Why not spare yourself and move on?
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