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Old 03-13-2013, 07:43 PM
 
2,650 posts, read 3,008,305 times
Reputation: 3466

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110 View Post
Not as funny as the crab's reading comprehension.

How about you actually read my post, in which I said his snoring WOKE ME UP?

But by all means, continue to presume you know what went on in my marriage. Your inaccurate assumptions are a good demonstration of how ignorance and presumptuousness often go hand in hand.
Does this mean if I send a friend request I'm going to get denied? lol

Sleep ties in deeply with my work. I'm required to constantly gauge the level of my mens performance and watch for a point where their awareness falls off to a dangerous level. I'm moderately well read on the subject of sleep and have to take recurring training on sleep deprivation and exhaustion annually. This is to say nothing of real world experience with sleep deprivation and exhaustion that is very very extensive, in depth, and of long duration. Its just possible I might know a little more about sleep than you think. Regardless my post was just a friendly word about something I find interesting and many people don't seem to know, much of what a good nights sleep is lies in the belief that one was had.

You know where I learned that little trick I described? When I was brought up (when you move up from the deck its called being brought up) my captain told me when he gave me the boat. He laughed so hard I thought he might break something looking at my face filled with the realization that I had been had. He in turn learned it from his captain when he was brought up. I don't actually know when that started but on boats going all the way back to the sailing days the captain has always owned the clocks and I suspect shenanigans with time have probably been going on for a long long time. Nowadays thats over, everyone and their brother has a smartphone and/or other devices and most commercial boats outside of the smallest possess satellite data connections. There is no manipulating the time anymore. Something thats vaguely makes me sad because its part of a simpler time which most of us up here miss.

As to you Lilac you can choose to believe that I'm so offensively stupid I believe I know what happened in someone elses bedroom or you can choose to believe that I was talking about the fact that sleep and how good or bad it was often just depends on how good or bad someone thinks it was. Your choice girl but before I let you go IMO if you want to see presumption, look in a mirror.
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Old 03-13-2013, 10:21 PM
 
Location: California
37,097 posts, read 42,103,316 times
Reputation: 34962
The thing about adult children....it's not usually a problem with bio-parents, just when a new guy/gal get's introduced into the picture. The child/parent relationship isn't something you can usually change late in life, especially if a person was in a long term relationship with the other bio-parent and raised their children up in a specific way. Some families do live all together under one roof, some get out ASAP and see each other on Holidays. There is no right or wrong, it's just preferences. It's just one more thing to add to the list of what you don't want in someone; no smokers, no dogs, no NASCAR, no country music, etc. Of course that list will vary by person
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Old 03-14-2013, 05:46 AM
 
246 posts, read 387,284 times
Reputation: 205
Quote:
Originally Posted by deliz View Post
Really I'm 53 have been divorced for 8 years and love my independence. Do I like the time I spend with my guy. Indeed. Does he or anyone ever come above my kids. Even when I'm 100 and their 70?? Probably not. You guys better learn what a child means to a mother. I go weeks and not see my kids. But .. If they needed to move back in - always. Same for his kids too
There is a line. Kids that need help due to a health issue, job loss, divorce etc. may need help from a parent and I support that. But in my case the oldest son and his wife moved in because their 1BR was too small. They should have gotten another larger apt right away instead of moving in with mom for 6 mos. I understood the law school grad moving in the 1st time, but the 2nd time was due to him not lining up another apt before his lease ran out, so mom's house became the temporary quarters. That's when I got booted. Won't happen again."
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Old 03-20-2013, 01:48 PM
 
5 posts, read 6,746 times
Reputation: 29
By solipsistically convincing themselves that they are "over relationships", it eases the pain that they are pretty much done for in the dating world after 50. It is a manifestation of denial, an convenient deflecting opiate that they ossified in their rigid minds afraid of dealing with the jarring cognitive dissonance of pain.

What a sharp contrast to when they were in their twenties and they were rude to everybody and believed that they were so superior that men had to PAY for them as if the women were "superior" (while subsequently claiming male oppression) and men had to "pay" becuase that's "how just things are".

Here's the deal.

Outside of your own immediate family, life is all about exploitation and leverage, just exercised in different ways depending on various factors (for men, intelligence and business prowess, for women, youth and beauty, by and large).

Humans didn't evolve from dust from the nebulas without exploitation and maximizing the situation in the harsh elements of the vast universe.
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Old 03-20-2013, 07:49 PM
 
4,253 posts, read 9,436,984 times
Reputation: 5140
Laughing here at the words of the 42-yo poster who is repulsed by 50-yo men.... 'Cause I met my SO when he was 55 and we started having babies like rabbits... (well, made 2 of them).

Not sure how I'd feel when/if I am single ... At first, need to raise those kids and by then I'll be into my 60s.... We can't predict how we'll feel 10 years ahead.... Similarly, I don't know how it feels to be a grandma - even as the OP's ex-gf is a grandma at approx. my age... Am feeling more like a young mother now - but I would imagine having produced 2 generations would make you feel aged and therefore more sensitive to the question of age; and make you more sensitive to pairing with someone who could potentially alter the well-being (or expectations) of your kids/grandkids. I could see women who are more easy-going by temperament, laid-back or childless as more willing to travel, act on a whim, feeling freer, revel in their new love etc.

Last edited by nuala; 03-20-2013 at 08:52 PM..
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Old 03-20-2013, 09:01 PM
 
4,253 posts, read 9,436,984 times
Reputation: 5140
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeekingWomanMyAge View Post
I understood the law school grad moving in the 1st time, but the 2nd time was due to him not lining up another apt before his lease ran out, so mom's house became the temporary quarters. That's when I got booted. Won't happen again."
Ah! This sounds as the real reason for the break-up, not the "age" or "other women". Did you try to tell her about your views of "the line"?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SeekingWomanMyAge View Post
There is a line.
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Old 03-20-2013, 11:52 PM
 
Location: Southern Illinois
10,364 posts, read 20,757,242 times
Reputation: 15643
Quote:
Originally Posted by chairlift040 View Post
By solipsistically convincing themselves that they are "over relationships", it eases the pain that they are pretty much done for in the dating world after 50. It is a manifestation of denial, an convenient deflecting opiate that they ossified in their rigid minds afraid of dealing with the jarring cognitive dissonance of pain.

What a sharp contrast to when they were in their twenties and they were rude to everybody and believed that they were so superior that men had to PAY for them as if the women were "superior" (while subsequently claiming male oppression) and men had to "pay" becuase that's "how just things are".

Here's the deal.

Outside of your own immediate family, life is all about exploitation and leverage, just exercised in different ways depending on various factors (for men, intelligence and business prowess, for women, youth and beauty, by and large).

Humans didn't evolve from dust from the nebulas without exploitation and maximizing the situation in the harsh elements of the vast universe.
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Old 03-21-2013, 09:16 AM
 
246 posts, read 387,284 times
Reputation: 205
Quote:
Originally Posted by nuala View Post
Ah! This sounds as the real reason for the break-up, not the "age" or "other women". Did you try to tell her about your views of "the line"?
She's finally speaking after 2 mos. and wants to remain friends ... Whatever. I brought up the family and she says no way that was the reason for her breaking up. She insists that the cause was my remarks about younger women and that I didn't "lust" for her. I'm hard pressed to recall many discussions in the last 2 years where I discussed women and their attractiveness other than when she brought it up (one of her phrases was "get your girl on" when observing an attractive woman ... She could do that but not me. So I did a little research (on the Internet for what it's worth) regarding the desire for lust in 50+ women. It's apparently not uncommon and if they don't get it from their SO then it's bye bye. So it is. I tried many times, all unsuccessfully, to reunite. So now am dating a woman in her 40's. See how that goes. She says she will seek what she's looking for (a lustful man that never talks about other women). I'm not sure her chances for an LTR are that good but maybe that's not what she wants ...
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Old 03-21-2013, 09:53 AM
 
Location: Chicagoland
5,749 posts, read 10,354,809 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by chairlift040 View Post
By solipsistically convincing themselves that they are "over relationships", it eases the pain that they are pretty much done for in the dating world after 50. It is a manifestation of denial, an convenient deflecting opiate that they ossified in their rigid minds afraid of dealing with the jarring cognitive dissonance of pain.

What a sharp contrast to when they were in their twenties and they were rude to everybody and believed that they were so superior that men had to PAY for them as if the women were "superior" (while subsequently claiming male oppression) and men had to "pay" becuase that's "how just things are".

Here's the deal.

Outside of your own immediate family, life is all about exploitation and leverage, just exercised in different ways depending on various factors (for men, intelligence and business prowess, for women, youth and beauty, by and large).

Humans didn't evolve from dust from the nebulas without exploitation and maximizing the situation in the harsh elements of the vast universe.
Awww... You're sweet... A true romantic!


There once was a man, so jaded, so disappointed, who lived in a world where everything was about control, leverage and manipulation. It was a competitive, selfish world with every one out for only themselves, everyone seeking to exploit another for their own power and status.

They were after their trip to the top of the chair lift, not just to chairlift040 - but to the golden gondola of life. Sometimes they paired up to leverage combined power, sometimes the power was created unwittingly only by their pairing. There were also those content to not take the ride at all, they sat on the deck, sharing moments, while others fought to rise to the top of the mountain.

And as some undoubtedly tumbled down over the moguls placed in their way, they sought rescue from their circle. For those with superficial connections, they have a jarring dissonance of pain when they realize what they could not achieve - a deeper, life-supporting connection to another. That humans perhaps evolved from dust with desires to connect spiritually with one another, to show deep empathy and love that goes beyond the bounds of simplistic superficiality. To fight against the harsh elements together. The examples are all around us.
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Old 03-21-2013, 10:32 AM
 
3,501 posts, read 6,153,579 times
Reputation: 10039
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeekingWomanMyAge View Post
So I did a little research (on the Internet for what it's worth) regarding the desire for lust in 50+ women. It's apparently not uncommon and if they don't get it from their SO then it's bye bye.
WTH? Seriously? This is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. Some anecdotal whining from some insecure people on the internet, and now we have a new phenomenon? This is me, rolling my eyes -->
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