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You made your bed, now you have to sleep in it and quite frankly, at age 48 your golden years are just around the corner so the age difference between the two of you is going to become less and less of a factor in the coming years. Also, the significant age difference between the two of you is something you should have thought about before you married him.
Those who are saying they've felt ashamed of the person they're dating or married to, because they're so much older or uglier or whatever, aren't really ashamed of that person.
They are ashamed of THEMSELVES. They are ashamed that they have exhibited such poor judgment or perhaps because they couldn't do any better than the person they're with. They are now unhappy with how others may perceive their relationship. The other person didn't do this to them - they did it to themselves.
I love it when I come across a gem like this, filled with wisdom. Excellent post TaoistDude.
Note to all the men in their late 20s and early 30s who plan on waving their wallets around when they're 50 to try to attract a woman in her 20s: This ^^^^ is what you have to look forward to in your dotage.
This needs to repeated again, and again.
I feel so sorry for the OP's husband. I don't think you can truly love someone and feel that way about them.
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Note to all the men in their late 20s and early 30s who plan on waving their wallets around when they're 50 to try to attract a woman in her 20s: This ^^^^ is what you have to look forward to in your dotage.
Yep, and I would all the men on the dating sites who intentionally seek much younger to realize this. This will happen and they only have themselves to blame.
if you don't know why involve him any further with it? speak your mind to him and either work through it to become a stronger couple or find out your initial feelings where the right ones and part ways to find where you can truly be happy.
there is no magic or easy formula to finding your happiness. you just have to follow where your interests take you.
Why does it only embarass you now? How long have you been married that you are still embarassed of the age difference? Was it an embarassment when you met? I doubt it, if you married him. Did you marry him for other reasons that weren't love? were you ever in love with him? Maybe this is cause of menopause? Don't do anything hasty. Think of the reasons you fell in love with him and what changed. A 24 yr old age difference is very large. You are at different stages in your life. You are at middle age and he is a senior. I believe in marriages no one stays attracted to each other it really is about personality and deeper things as people get older. They get more comfortable with one another. Sex life can be duller but for that you need to seek help from a marriage therapist perhaps or go on a getaway trip to somewhere you can experience something different and adventure worthy together.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kitkat42207
I'm usually not a rude person at all. Something just happened that made me stop to think.
I was out shopping with my husband and ran into a friend I hadn't seen in years. We chatted away for 10 minutes or so with my husband standing there. I didn't introduce him at all. Why was I being rude? Well, I'm embarrassed of my much older husband. I don't like to admit he's my husband to people. I'm 48 He's 72. I know, I didn't have a gun to my head to marry him. He has some good qualities. I'm just not attracted to him anymore. On the way home, it just really made me think, do I really want to be with someone I feel so negative about. I don't know sometimes. Any input? Insights?
We've been together 16 years, almost 9 married. When we were first together, I was attracted to him but lately over the last few years not so much. I do love him then and now. I am here for him as he is for me. He's a good man with wonderful qualities I just sometimes feel he looks so old and I don't want to admit sometimes that he is my man. I don't know I feel bad about it but that's how I feel sometimes.
We've been together 16 years, almost 9 married. When we were first together, I was attracted to him but lately over the last few years not so much. I do love him then and now. I am here for him as he is for me. He's a good man with wonderful qualities I just sometimes feel he looks so old and I don't want to admit sometimes that he is my man. I don't know I feel bad about it but that's how I feel sometimes.
Ya marry a guy in his 70s he's gonna look "old"! You will too when you reach that age! Did you not know that people age and their looks change?
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