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I was 17 (she was a few months younger), we didn't intend for it to happen, feelings sort of just developed after around 3 months of friendly IM chatting. Then we talked on the phone (every night for a year, literally), which eventually included video camera chatting. We couldn't meet because she was 1,200 miles away.
After a year of talking I flew to meet her, and it was eery how effortless the transition was. I remember she picked me up from the airport - yep, I knew the clothes she was wearing, how her hair was, exactly what she looked like, the only new thing was the smell of her perfume. And that I could hug her.
We got 10 years out of that relationship, it was my first ever relationship, and her first serious one. Within the first year, I turned down a girl at my school, and she did the same with a guy who was pursuing her.
I definitely would not do it again, but it does happen..
Sweet. You're probably an exception though. Often the fantasy is better than reality.
Sweet. You're probably an exception though. Often the fantasy is better than reality.
Not so sweet. If you take a minute to remember his threads and story, you know his fantasy ultimately turned into a nightmare of a marriage he's only just gotten out of - mentally ill wife, multiple suicide attempts, in-laws from hell etc....
Not so sweet. If you take a minute to remember his threads and story, you know his fantasy ultimately turned into a nightmare of a marriage he's only just gotten out of - mentally ill wife, multiple suicide attempts, in-laws from hell etc....
You're talking about the end of a 10 year relationship - made when we were teenagers.
That doesn't take away from the good that we had, and we did have a lot of good throughout the 10 years together.
Thanks for trying to undermine though..and very nice how a 5 year marriage/10 year relationship = a "fantasy."
You're talking about the end of a 10 year relationship - made when we were teenagers.
That doesn't take away from the good that we had, and we did have a lot of good throughout the 10 years together...
Thanks for trying to undermine though..
Wasn't trying to "undermine" anything (what could I be undermining, the relationship is over?)
Was only saying to the poster minx that yes, while your initial meeting as you described it was "sweet" it turned into a nightmare of a marriage so she shouldn't think you really had "made it" as the one successful couple who supposedly falls in love without ever meeting in person, that's all.
Wasn't trying to "undermine" anything (what could I be undermining, the relationship is over?)
Was only saying to the poster minx that yes, while your initial meeting as you described it was "sweet" it turned into a nightmare of a marriage so she shouldn't think you really had "made it" as the one successful couple who supposedly falls in love without ever meeting in person, that's all.
Um..we did successfully make it as per the topic of the thread.
You're talking about marriage trouble years and years and years down the line - that's what got us in, after 10 years together, during the teenage/young 20 years...people change immensely then...
We met online, spent a year talking online, developed strong feelings for one another that eventually turned into a marriage (5 years later). We divorced 5 years after saying "I do."
Um..we did successfully make it as per the topic of the thread.
You're talking about marriage trouble years and years and years down the line - that's what got us in.
We met online, spent a year talking online, developed strong feelings for one another that eventually turned into a marriage (5 years later).
No offense, as I really mean you no harm, but you are kind of making my point here.
You met online but didn't meet in person for a long time. Then when you did meet in person you had to travel like 1200 miles for that one time visit - which is not the same as actually living in the same city and getting to date one another to really get to KNOW one another. Were you even living in the same city when you married? And if so, how long had you been in the same city?
See, my point is, some of what eventually was the hell your marriage became could have very likely been avoided if you'd actually had time together, in person, to get to date and know one other and each other's families over an extended period.
I am happy you feel you had a few good years together. But the fact it all ended so badly means it wasn't really very successful as far as the topic of this thread goes, see?
No offense, as I really mean you no harm, but you are kind of making my point here.
You met online but didn't meet in person for a long time. Then when you did meet in person you had to travel like 1200 miles for that one time visit - which is not the same as actually living in the same city and getting to date one another to really get to KNOW one another. Were you even living in the same city when you married? And if so, how long had you been in the same city?
See, my point is, some of what eventually was the hell your marriage became could have very likely been avoided if you'd actually had time together, in person, to get to date and know one other and each other's families over an extended period.
I am happy you feel you had a few good years together. But the fact it all ended so badly means it wasn't really very successful as far as the topic of this thread goes, see?
Are you kidding (bold)?
Of course.
We were practically inseparable. I moved in with her dad for a few months (8ish), she moved back to my state for 4 years (I was at the university, she wasn't in school). We drove up/flew to spend vacations and time with her family repeatedly over the years.
I went camping numerous times with her family and genuinely had fun with them. What you're confused about, is you don't seem to understand the dynamics changed. You want to condemn the whole 10 years based off the very end of it. Sorry, but no.
Keep in mind the topic of this thread is falling in love online. NOT - "falling in love online with a relationship that lasted your whole life. Only people aged 90 and above may post."
For some reason, you have a bone to pick, and think you know more about my marriage and life than I do.
Um..we did successfully make it as per the topic of the thread.
You're talking about marriage trouble years and years and years down the line - that's what got us in, after 10 years together, during the teenage/young 20 years...people change immensely then...
We met online, spent a year talking online, developed strong feelings for one another that eventually turned into a marriage (5 years later). We divorced 5 years after saying "I do."
I'm with you TEBM, no disrespect LM, but he knows his situation, if he considers it success, it is success. Very interesting story and you certainly seem to be the exception to the rule. the 1% that works for. I too consider your marriage successful. 10 years together absolutely means something in my book.
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anything (what could I be undermining, the relationship is over?)
