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BIG difference between "space and alone time" and never sleeping in the same room (you do realize that's at least a THIRD of your life spent apart?) and never sharing the same sections of the house because we need to "escape" from one another.
There is no need to "acknowledge" something that holds no value or truth to us personally - surely you don't expect us to say you are right when we don't agree that you are?
If they aren't even aware of that third, what difference does it make? Most people also spend at least another third apart, awake, when they go to work. What matters is that the time they do spend together, they enjoy.
I think Mr. Spock has a very good point about people getting divorced when one retires. At the very least, it can drive the other spouse nuts when the retiree expects that spouse to be a constant source of entertainment and company. If I only had a dollar for every time I heard, "OMG, he's under my feet all day every day. I wish he'd just go fishing or something."
Run a search for "husband retired driving me nuts." It's telling.
I'm sure it happens with women, too, but I suspect the biggest issues crop up between women who were SAHMs and homemakers and their retired husbands.
You definitely are. I need far more "me time" than my BF, but so far we are managing.
I am like that too and it's not just with my husband. I really like my space. There are some days I come home from work and I really don't have the desire to talk to anyone.
So far it's not a major issue, however I can see it turning into one when we retire.
If they aren't even aware of that third, what difference does it make? Most people also spend at least another third apart, awake, when they go to work. What matters is that the time they do spend together, they enjoy.
I think Mr. Spock has a very good point about people getting divorced when one retires. At the very least, it can drive the other spouse nuts when the retiree expects that spouse to be a constant source of entertainment and company. If I only had a dollar for every time I heard, "OMG, he's under my feet all day every day. I wish he'd just go fishing or something."
Run a search for "husband retired driving me nuts." It's telling.
I'm sure it happens with women, too, but I suspect the biggest issues crop up between women who were SAHMs and homemakers and their retired husbands.
Yes I've wondered about the retiring thing too with some couples, especially with workaholics. I think it's one cause of the "grey divorces" being on the rise.
I would love to retire with my spouse just as long as we have our time apart and I can go down to my basement hideaway to have my alone time, she feels the same way. But we love to have our time together too.
I would love to retire with my spouse just as long as we have our time apartand I can go down to my basement hideaway to have my alone time, she feels the same way. But we love to have our time together too.
Why dont you guys get separate homes that way you dont interrupt each other's alone time....and only meet when a get together is scheduled. just a suggestion
My parents have been married for going on 53 years, and my mom has always said that their longevity has been because they're not up each other's noses all the time. My dad retired early, and they've been on a completely different schedule. He wakes up late and stays up late reading or watching old movies; she gets up at 5 am and is dozing on the couch by 8 pm. They both belong to separate activities and organizations. They do travel and go to the theater and concerts, and they always, always have dinner together, but other than that, they do their own thing.
I absolutely agree, Mr Spock. My husband and I have been married 34 years. We moved into our own bedrooms, about a year ago. We both get better sleep and aren't grouches all day from getting restless sleep! Our relationship has not suffered at all. We have more sex now, because we are more rested and have more energy for the fun things in a marriage and we have two beds to enjoy our together time in, lol.
But why get married in the first place, if you need to escape or hideaway from the other person. Seems pretty stupid to me. I am really failing to see any benefits of marriage to a young man today.
But why get married in the first place, if you need to escape or hideaway from the other person. Seems pretty stupid to me. I am really failing to see any benefits of marriage to a young man today.
Not escape or hideaway in a bad way. Just time to yourself to maybe read a book while he watches golf, etc...
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I need far more "me time" than my BF, but so far we are managing. 
and we have two beds to enjoy our together time in, lol.
