1. Overweight or looks like he's about to give birth to ten puppies (there are very, very, very few
valid excuses for a man to be overweight; men naturally have more muscle than women and muscle burns calories 24/7, soooooooooooo...)
.
2. Poor personal and dental hygiene (e.g., rarely brushes his teeth, rarely flosses, never visits a dentist to have his teeth cleaned – ever, has breath that could start a brush fire, doesn't wash his face every morning, doesn't use antiperspirant, smells like a billy goat, etc.).
3. Doesn't watch sports (I don't need him "breathin' on me" 24/7; he needs something else – besides me – to occupy his free time, and I'd prefer that it be sports, preferably football).
4. Possessive/Controlling/Jealous/Insecure (if you don't trust me, you don't need me; yes, it really is that simple)
.
5. Smoker (kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray; it's a very unpleasant experience – in my opinion).
6. Homophobic (he doesn't need to be friends with any gay people, however, he does need to be respectful of my gay friends, especially the "closeted" ones).
7. Financially insecure (he doesn't have to be a millionaire, but he does need to have enough money to pay at least half of the expenses for a weekend getaway – hiking, fishing, shrimp festival, chili cook-off, classic car show, auto show, animal sanctuary, spontaneous road trip, etc. – about once a month).
8. Single parent (I don't care if he has kids, I just don't want a guy who's a single parent because in my mind, he's probably looking for a woman to take care of his kid(s) because he's finally realized that being a full-time parent is expensive, time-consuming, and very, very stressful).
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Michigan supporters rule the world....j/k
