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Old 03-30-2013, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Way up high
22,237 posts, read 29,269,623 times
Reputation: 31306

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What does her sucking 35 cranks over 10 years ago have to do with the life you and her have built together?? Seriously?? GROW UP

 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:39 AM
 
1,454 posts, read 2,162,526 times
Reputation: 1072
Quote:
Originally Posted by himain View Post
What does her sucking 35 cranks over 10 years ago have to do with the life you and her have built together?? Seriously?? GROW UP
The OP is stuck in his high school and early 20's years.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:41 AM
 
Location: Hell, NY
3,187 posts, read 5,139,471 times
Reputation: 5704
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Here's the thing so many of us are trying to point out that you guys are missing...

THERE DOESN'T HAVE TO BE ANY LOSERS EITHER.

If there are, that's his choice.

But there are other choices.

You know what I'll agree. That's a very valid point. I didn't think of that because I myself don't think that I could have handled that. In fact I know I couldn't have. So that never even crossed my mind. I don't think that the op' can either. That's another reason why that never crossed my mind. But nevertheless, very valid point. I think it would take a very understanding, tolerant person to accept all of that. I'm alot of good things, but on this particular topic, I would not be capable of letting that go. I've been with the same girl long enough to be considered married, and had I found that out about her-I myself would be crushed. And I would leave her! Right or wrong. That in particular would exceed my limits on what I could tolerate. That's just for me. It doesn't mean that I could not tolerate alot of other things from women, but that is just not one of them. It wouldn't happen to me though, because I don't ever ask a women about their past sexual conguests/ behavior. I learned that lesson about twenty something years ago.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:43 AM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,972,596 times
Reputation: 20084
I think it's strange that you had a "sex talk" with your partner. Who does that? It's really none of your business what she did in her past as long as she's clean. She didn't tell you because she thought you would judge her, and you proved her right.

Going down on 35 guys is gross. I'm with you there, but it's over and done with.

I think you're more upset that you couldn't get in her pants on the first date. Would you be happier if she'd blown you under the table during your first meeting?

Get over yourself. Do her a favor and let her go to find a man who's not threatened by her past.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:44 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,489,477 times
Reputation: 40198
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
You know what I'll agree. That's a very valid point. I didn't think of that because I myself don't think that I could have handled that. In fact I know I couldn't have. So that never even crossed my mind. I don't think that the op' can either. That's another reason why that never crossed my mind. But nevertheless, very valid point. I think it would take a very understanding, tolerant person to accept all of that. I'm alot of good things, but on this particular topic, I would not be capable of letting that go. I've been with the same girl long enough to be considered married, and had I found that out about her-I myself would be crushed. And I would leave her! Right or wrong. That in particular would exceed my limits on what I could tolerate. That's just for me. It doesn't mean that I could not tolerate alot of other things from women, but that is just not one of them. It wouldn't happen to me though, because I don't ever ask a women about their past sexual conguests/ behavior. I learned that lesson about twenty something years ago.
Appreciate your willingness to see there are other ways of looking at this

Everyone is different, and it's always good to know your own limitations.

I said this back on post #113 and was dead serious:

When I fell in love with my husband I fell in love with him for who he is.

And who he is was shaped by all the experiences he had, good and bad, up to that point of me meeting and falling in love with him.

Short of finding out he was some kind of sociopath or criminal predator who hurt people, there is not much he could have ever told me about himself AFTER I fell in love with him that would have killed my love for him because true love accepts and loves UNCONDITIONALLY.

 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:44 AM
 
5,472 posts, read 7,592,324 times
Reputation: 5793
Quote:
Originally Posted by StabbyAbby View Post
She was drunk?
Yep, I am pretty sure alcohol is to blame. Just like in any other case of slutty behavior. The booze did it.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:52 AM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,972,596 times
Reputation: 20084
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post

You want him to love her and put it behind. Yet, she clearly didn't love herself when she was servicing half the university. Why should anyone love anyone who doesn't even have any love/ respect for themselves.
Didn't and doesn't are two very different things.

This happened many years ago. Are you saying that because someone had an issue with self worth and respect a decade ago that they never deserve to be loved?
 
Old 03-30-2013, 11:55 AM
 
10,005 posts, read 11,112,262 times
Reputation: 6298
Quote:
Originally Posted by the minx View Post
Didn't and doesn't are two very different things.

This happened many years ago. Are you saying that because someone had an issue with self worth and respect a decade ago that they never deserve to be loved?
Valid point and what makes the conversation so so difficult.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 12:00 PM
 
Location: Hell, NY
3,187 posts, read 5,139,471 times
Reputation: 5704
Quote:
Originally Posted by the minx View Post
Didn't and doesn't are two very different things.

This happened many years ago. Are you saying that because someone had an issue with self worth and respect a decade ago that they never deserve to be loved?

Not at all, but truthfully I'm tired of arguing. I'm even starting to suspect/ wonder if this is a troll post. Of course how one feels about themselves at one point in their life has little if nothing to do with weather or not they deserve love. Personally, I think that everybody deserves someone. That of course is within reason. People who kill, rapists, women beaters, men beaters, pedophiles, they in my opinion don't deserve someone. The fact that he is having such a hard time handling this makes me think that clearly they are not right for each other.

Before the last few posts. We who had been debating this had actually been making grounds. It seems like we're right back to where we were about an hour ago. But I digress. I am too tired of this petty sh t. Anyone can think what they want. This post is closed as far as I am concerned.
 
Old 03-30-2013, 12:15 PM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,972,596 times
Reputation: 20084
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
Not at all, but truthfully I'm tired of arguing. I'm even starting to suspect/ wonder if this is a troll post. Of course how one feels about themselves at one point in their life has little if nothing to do with weather or not they deserve love. Personally, I think that everybody deserves someone. That of course is within reason. People who kill, rapists, women beaters, men beaters, pedophiles, they in my opinion don't deserve someone. The fact that he is having such a hard time handling this makes me think that clearly they are not right for each other.

Before the last few posts. We who had been debating this had actually been making grounds. It seems like we're right back to where we were about an hour ago. But I digress. I am too tired of this petty sh t. Anyone can think what they want. This post is closed as far as I am concerned.
Making ground towards what?

I'm not arguing. I simply noticed that your statements conflicted.
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