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It is a basic need. None of us would be here without it!
It is not a basic need because there are people who live their lives like everyone else without feeling the need to have sex. Maybe some people aren't slaves to such simple feelings. Also let's be honest there are many people whose parents made a mistake.
I think that type of chickensh*t-sky-is-falling doomsday speech is much more unrealistic than the reality of the OP's situation
Nobody knows the reality of the OPs situation except the OP. Maybe even he doesn't know it. There's a reason he's been avoiding sex all these years despite his protestations to the contrary.
Nobody shuns sex for 52 years because they've been too busy or have had no time or they've been in Europe.
Perhaps some councelling is in order, depending on how important it is to him to get to the bottom of this.
I'm 52 and a virgin. The other day I was listening to a specialist saying that sex was needed as food or sleep.
I've always lived quite a normal life without it and never noticed any difference in my health from that. If I didn't eat or sleep, I'm sure there would be consequences.
Doesn't that preconceived notion that sex is a basic need sound ridiculous to you?
I don't believe it's ridiculous. It may not be like water or food but it is another very important thing for us as a species and as individuals.
Everyone needs a release. I believe that is what sex (this includes the M) does for you. there also has been studies saying occasional Os can be beneficial for a person. In men it helps keep the prostate healthy and prevents prostate cancer. I'm not completely sure of the benefits in women.
There are also the psychological effects of sex. If you in a relationship people tend to feel more connected to their partner which can be good longevity wise. Besides that, people of both genders get that release. As I understand it people who are stressed tend to release themselves using the M a lot more often. Also, for many people there is a buildup of tension psychologically that can cause other types of stress. You've heard of Sexual frustration? Well, it exists and can become a big problem.
There is one more benefit that sex has. That is reproduction. We, as a species have a natural desire to pass our genetic material to future generations. It's the best way for us to achieve immortality at the moment. It also keeps the genepool healthy and thriving.
A few people mentioned it earlier but sex as a basic need comes from Maslow. He came up with his theroy in the 1950s. And while it is not a basic need like food, water, oxygen, etc it is a basic need to reach the top level of self actualization. Also on a less important level it is needed for the survival of the human race. Now remember he came up with this in the 1950s.
What if you didn't masturbate and say the only way you could get off was through sex? Would you consider it a need then?
That's a good point Trimac. He obviously has a strong sex drive. Plus after reading that one of his fears of getting into a relationship with a woman was that he has a bad/quick temper leads me to believe he might actually be fearful of becoming an abuser. Maybe he watched his mother be abused by his father and is horrified by the thought of becoming like him. That would certainly give me pause in his situation. I think, or my theory is, he threw himself into his work at an early age to avoid this and now he feels lonely and confused. I do give him kudos for not wanting to hurt a woman or any possible children from the relationship but nowadays there are plenty of great counselors out there and medications he can take that perhaps can hinder or completely put an end to his temperament. However, these medications will also lower his sex drive. Most of all, as many posters have suggested, I think he should seek some counseling so that maybe he can begin enjoying a "normal" for lack of a better word, life.
Although there are many monks and nuns who can live without sex given the fact that he's masturbating so much it shows he cannot - it is a need with him but he is terrified of taking it to the next level - as in having sex with a woman.
I'm curious if my theory is anywhere close to the truth? OP?
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