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I'm horrified and can't imagine. But I believe you.
I'm not and never have been part of the "oh, it's just sex" mentality. To each his/her own on that.
However the "most men" in her post is flat out not true.
Sadly with a good percentage, anything goes.
As for the decreasing marriage rate, to me it's like a potpourri of reasons although some stand out more than others.
Now the marriage rate is decreasing because my generation is now seeing that they don't have to get married out of necessity. We're seeing so many successful independent people.
Average income for a single woman is 30K. That is not very good living. Average income for married households where both work are 90K and they can share costs. That means you can have much higher standard of living being married.
Also average woman who get married is happier than woman who don't get married. 28% of single woman are depressed, 16% of married woman are depressed. This is the number of people who say they are very happy.
http://wps.ablongman.com/ab_henslin_...ent/index.html
That is true for men as well. But in America it is perceived that you sacrifice career to get married, but most of the women focusing on career will get almost no where. Also, it is not marriage that prevents you from focusing on your career, but children. And getting children outside marriage is worse for your career, yourself and the children. And getting children late will make your career suffer too. But most of these single people want children eventually. Then when they finally decide to date, they have a much harder time, because young women are in much higher demand.
But young people don't want that to be true. They want to play around, they want to have fun while they are still young and demanded. Since, they want to remain single, they make up arguments and tell their friends. People want others to do the same thing as they do. Hence, they will tell their friends how amazing it is to be single. That leads to big forces in society pushing for people to focus on career/having fun instead of family.
I am not saying people can't focus on career/having fun instead of family. But the problem is that people are not getting to know the risks of waiting. They are also fed misinformation by people who want people to wait.
If you want to get married and having kids eventually. Is it really a good idea to wait till the mid 30s, when you are very close to be unable to have children. Why would men want you instead of a more fertile and often prettier younger woman? A lot of these women are never able to lower their requirements, and often end up single, poor and unhappy. That is the reality today, and that was the reality 50 years ago. Nothing has changed, just the perception.
Also average woman who get married is happier than woman who don't get married. 28% of single woman are depressed, 16% of married woman are depressed. That is true for men as well..
This isn't what studies show. They show that single women are happiest, married men are next, married women are one step up from the bottom, which is represented by single men, the most miserable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Camlon
If you want to get married eventually. Is it really a good idea to wait till the mid 30s, when you are very close to be unable to have children. Why would men want you instead of a more fertile and often prettier younger woman? A lot of these women are never able to lower their requirements, and often end up single, poor and unhappy. That is the reality today, and that was the reality 50 years ago.
Scare tactics, nothing more. Most men in their 30's want to marry women close to their age. Most women can have kids well into their 40's. I know women who had kids at 50 and 51. Women are capable of a lot more than you give them credit for.
Scare tactics, nothing more. Most men in their 30's want to marry women close to their age. Most women can have kids well into their 40's. I know women who had kids at 50 and 51. Women are capable of a lot more than you give them credit for.
But at what risk?
There is a noticeable decline in the fertility rate starting at age 35 to a level of about 10% per month. A woman seeking pregnancy over 35 should consult a fertility specialist after only 6 months of actively attempting to become pregnant. The pregnancy risk over 35 is higher as well as evidenced an increase in the miscarriage rate and the incidence of genetic abnormality in pregnancy. At 35, the miscarriage rate is 25% and the risk of Down syndrome becomes about 1/350 ...
Estimates from embryo biopsy reveal that at least 90% of a woman’s eggs are genetically abnormal when a woman is over 40. This is explains the increased pregnancy risk over 40. The miscarriage rate is 33% at age 40. Genetically abnormal pregnancies are more common as well with an incidence of 1/38 at age 40. For this reason, there are many women over 40 who choose to use an egg donor to become pregnant ...
The pregnancy risk over 45 is also increased. In the unlikely event that a woman over 45 becomes pregnant with her own eggs, the pregnancy risk over 45 results in a miscarriage rate of at least 50% and the incidence of a genetically abnormal pregnancy of 1 in 12
This isn't what studies show. They show that single women are happiest, married men are next, married women are one step up from the bottom, which is represented by single men, the most miserable.
Scare tactics, nothing more. Most men in their 30's want to marry women close to their age. Most women can have kids well into their 40's. I know women who had kids at 50 and 51. Women are capable of a lot more than you give them credit for.
This part. I just completed my clinicals in a L&D unit and I can honestly say that it blew me away that the majority of people who were having babies, their first child, were 35+. Some had their first child at 46, 47 when they didn't even think they COULD get pregnant and their husbands doted on them and actually loved them for what they had to offer as individuals and it wasn't all about having kids and having a family. We women are worth far more than our baby-making ability and people in general are coming to that realization.
This isn't what studies show. They show that single women are happiest, married men are next, married women are one step up from the bottom, which is represented by single men, the most miserable.
I have given you 3 sources that your statement is wrong. I have no problems with people marrying late, but stop making up facts to support it.
One of the reasons marriage rate is low, is because people like you have been spreading misinformation. Reality is that married people are happier, richer and in better health than people who don't get married. That doesn't mean all marriages are good, but single life can be rewarding, but also very punishing.
Quote:
Scare tactics, nothing more. Most men in their 30's want to marry women close to their age. Most women can have kids well into their 40's. I know women who had kids at 50 and 51. Women are capable of a lot more than you give them credit for.
Then reality is scary. Women over 35 are a lot less demanded than women under 30. Nor just due to a preference of younger women, but also because of a lack of availability. Most men who wait that long are either losers or players. And getting children after 40 is not recommended.
There is a noticeable decline in the fertility rate starting at age 35 to a level of about 10% per month. A woman seeking pregnancy over 35 should consult a fertility specialist after only 6 months of actively attempting to become pregnant. The pregnancy risk over 35 is higher as well as evidenced an increase in the miscarriage rate and the incidence of genetic abnormality in pregnancy. At 35, the miscarriage rate is 25% and the risk of Down syndrome becomes about 1/350 ...
Estimates from embryo biopsy reveal that at least 90% of a woman’s eggs are genetically abnormal when a woman is over 40. This is explains the increased pregnancy risk over 40. The miscarriage rate is 33% at age 40. Genetically abnormal pregnancies are more common as well with an incidence of 1/38 at age 40. For this reason, there are many women over 40 who choose to use an egg donor to become pregnant ...
The pregnancy risk over 45 is also increased. In the unlikely event that a woman over 45 becomes pregnant with her own eggs, the pregnancy risk over 45 results in a miscarriage rate of at least 50% and the incidence of a genetically abnormal pregnancy of 1 in 12
And then there are the women who get pregnant at the drop of a hat at 35+. Declining fertility at a rate of 10%/month makes no sense. That would mean that by 37 women would be completely infertile, which isn't at all the case.
Keep trying, though. Keep digging up the factoids, and "proof" that women should rush into marriage in their 20's. With enough effort, you'll probably manage to scare somebody eventually.
I have not given you 2 sources that your statement is wrong. I have no problems with people marrying late, but stop making up facts to support it.
lol! You said it, I didn't!
Not making up facts. Study results saying single women are happiest, and the rest of it, made the rounds in the media back in the 90's. Similar studies were done in Russia with the same results. Sounds like you're scared that women won't have you, so you have to scare them into rushing into marriage. Any port in a storm.
And then there are the women who get pregnant at the drop of a hat at 35+. Declining fertility at a rate of 10%/month makes no sense. That would mean that by 37 women would be completely infertile, which isn't at all the case.
They are not saying fertility drops by 10% per month whatever that should mean. They say the rate drops to 10% per month.
Apart from infertility, here is another problem.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
lol! You said it, I didn't!
Not making up facts. Study results saying single women are happiest, and the rest of it, made the rounds in the media back in the 90's. Similar studies were done in Russia with the same results. Sounds like you're scared that women won't have you, so you have to scare them into rushing into marriage. Any port in a storm.
Good luck with that.
What studies? I have now given you 3 studies, you have given 0. Saying you heard about a study from the 90s does not count. I want the actual study.
I am not scared woman won't have me. I am in a safe and secure long term relationship. I am just pointing out the reality, a reality you don't want to be true. The reality is that people who are married are richer, happier and healthier than single people. In fact they are also more sexually satisfied.
As pointed out, I think people should be free to choose what they would like to do. What I don't like is people spreading misinformation.
Keep trying, though. Keep digging up the factoids, and "proof" that women should rush into marriage in their 20's. With enough effort, you'll probably manage to scare somebody eventually.
Wrong call, Ruth - where's the Truth? I'm not the idiot who made that claim - are you an idiot for not checking your facts? I'm just saying that your "information" on fertility and risks are wrong. I provided a reputable source. Do you have a reputable source to refute it?
Oh, and the decline in fertility rate slows with time, so your math is wrong, which you might have realized if you'd bothered to check the article and figure it out.
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