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Old 05-18-2013, 06:20 AM
 
17 posts, read 39,274 times
Reputation: 14

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Hi guys I have a dilemma for you and I would like your advice. To make a long story short, my husband and I have been married for about 2 months and we are on vacation here in India. He is Indian btw, anyway we went up to the hills the other day and we were looking for a room and we saw a young girl around 18 and he asked her about a room and she was like ok I will show you MY HUSBAND around and that I ME can stay there and she and my husband will go and look for the room and for me to rest. But I was like no I want to come because I need the exercise

Anyway the next day we went walking and we met into the 18 year old girls brother and he and my husband were talking and stuff and then they wanted to go back up to the hills where they live with his 18 year old sister that girl that showed us around the other day. So my husband was like come with us but me I was like no baby I want to stay here. And he was like you sure and I was like yes. So that was around 6:30pm in the evening and he came back around 9pm that night. When he came back, he seemed different or strange. I couldn't put my finger on it. Almost distant like his mind was somewhere else and I was like you ok? And he was like Yes. But it was just words because his face and just his ora seemed different. Like his mind was somewhere else. Anyway that night we went to bed and do you know the very next morning he got up and went straight back up them hills? He said he tried waking me up to come with him I think I remember him pushing me but I was tired. Anyway when I finally got up I realized that he was not there at 9:30am and so I called him and asked him, where are you? And he was kind of stumbling like well you know dear I tried waking you up to come with me. I'm like come with you where? Where are you? And he said that he is at Aunties house. Auntie is the 18 year old girls mother that he calls Auntie. So I was like what the hell is so important up in those hills that you wake up early in the morning to go back up there from last night? So he was trying to give excuses. And so I said, You know what, stay there, I'm leaving and going back to America. And he kept trying to explain but I hung up the phone on him

Let me tell you that those hills from where we are staying is at least 30 minutes away from our hotel, that guy got to my hotel room in literally like 10 minutes. I really don't know how he did that. But he grabbed the internet stick away from me to stop me from calling the airlines. And I was like I don't know what is so important that you leave early in the morning to go back up to those hills. So I asked him, are you having sex with somebody up there or with that 18 year old girl. And he said no, I swear and that he just loves going up there because Auntie is Punjabi just like him and the part of INdia that we are in is for foreigners and not Indians from Punjab.

Anyway ever since that day May 6, 2013 when he came in that night, he seemed different. Now let me tell you something else. He does take me up there with him everytime he goes up there. But I sense this 18 year old girl is too friendly with him. Right in front of me. BUT in all sincerity, she is friendly with all the guys and foreigners there. But he just met this girl the other day and calls her his sister. And that I am crazy and nasty. He says here is India once you say someone is your sister, they don't even think of anything sexual like that. He says that my mind is very dirty. It's not that my mind is dirty, It's just that I know men. Then she's gonna tell me that I must trust him Also right in front of me, she asks me for his skype Id, and at first I was like ok but then I asked her why and she was like WHY NOT HE IS MY BROTHER. So at that time my husband was high on marijuana it is legal to smoke it there and he said to her, the reason why is because she don't trust me and I was like that is not true and she was like ok alright it is ok no fighting.

Also ever since that day May 6, 2013 those people in the hills act like they own my husband. The mother he calls Auntie, that 18 year old girl and the brother. Constantly calling him and if he does not go because I don't feel comfortable with him going up to the hills to be around that 18 year old girl, then those people get angry WHY. Perfect example is when he was leaving the hills because I told him to stay that and I'm going back to America, The Auntie mother woman said why are you going and he said because my wife and she said SO. And then he said, I'm sorry I got to go. These people don't respect me. What the hell is going on. And now last night there was the brothers birthday party and we did not go and they kept calling him like crazy and he said that he is not going and I heard him in the bathroom talking to the 18 year old girl lets call her Priya and it looked like he was trying to explain and then it seemed like she might have hung up the phone because next thing you know he stopped saying Priya Priya and then all of a sudden he started saying Auntie and was explaining to Auntie.
After he got off the phone, he said to me, WE ARE GOING TO THAT PARTY. And I said," No I am not going. And he started yelling and then all of a sudden he said," GO BACK HOME TO AMERICA AND I WILL SEND YOU ONE PAPER AND YOU SIGN IT FOR A DIVORCE and I was like WHAT? HE WAS LIKE BOOK YOUR TICKET NOW. I started crying and was like ok I will and I will leave you alone but as I was crying I said you are very ungrateful and what goes around will come around. So as I was booking my ticket he stopped me and said that he loved me and that not to go. He was angry. That was yesterday. Do you know all day today this man's mind is somewhere else. Looking into the ceiling, blank stares into the wall. What the hell is going on? His mind does not seem to be here with me at all. I ask him are you ok what's wrong and he keeps telling me nothing. Nothing. Keep in mind that I've done alot of things for this man. His family abandoned him. When he was in trouble nobody was there for him but me. I've helped him out with money. How can he put his attention on people he just met a week ago and he has known me for 3 years?[SIZE=5]What the hell is going on guys can you please tell me and also tell me what do you think I should do thanks. I really need all your replies. Thanks[/SIZE]
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Old 05-18-2013, 06:24 AM
 
35,121 posts, read 36,948,368 times
Reputation: 61781
Talk to your husband he is the ONLY ONE who can tell answer ALL of your questions.

I will say I did not read the entire novella you wrote because it is just way too much for one post.
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Old 05-18-2013, 06:40 AM
 
518 posts, read 1,294,916 times
Reputation: 322
I read through the first paragraph and then stopped reading. Can you shorten?
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Old 05-18-2013, 06:43 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,411 posts, read 19,143,462 times
Reputation: 11044
Sounds very strange. Your post doesn't make much sense, but because you kept threatening to leave him and did not participate in what was going on, you might as well leave.

Essentially you did not trust him. Was he this way back home?
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Old 05-18-2013, 06:47 AM
 
Location: Midwest
706 posts, read 919,595 times
Reputation: 875
No idea, only he knows. Do you live there or is this a vacation. If its a vacation END IT.
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Old 05-18-2013, 07:29 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
31,050 posts, read 17,879,326 times
Reputation: 11971
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prescious View Post
he said to me, WE ARE GOING TO THAT PARTY. And I said," No I am not going. And he started yelling and then all of a sudden he said," GO BACK HOME TO AMERICA AND I WILL SEND YOU ONE PAPER AND YOU SIGN IT FOR A DIVORCE and I was like WHAT? HE WAS LIKE BOOK YOUR TICKET NOW.

Keep in mind that I've done alot of things for this man. His family abandoned him. When he was in trouble nobody was there for him but me. I've helped him out with money. How can he put his attention on people he just met a week ago and he has known me for 3 years?[SIZE=5]What the hell is going on guys can you please tell me and also tell me what do you think I should do thanks. I really need all your replies. Thanks[/SIZE]
You really don't need internet strangers to tell you what is going on.

"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
― Maya Angelou

“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”
― Maya Angelou


You need to find a good counselor for you. If there are no children involved, you are lucky. This is a self esteem issue and it's about you and you need to find the LOVE for yourself to move on to find a man that will VALUE what you have to offer. You are valuable and beautiful and you need to have someone treat you kindly, respectfully and bring as much to the table as you do.

He is not going to change. The only ace in his pocket is that you don't value yourself. You need to start preparing for another chapter of your life. He won't follow you, he'll find the next sucker!
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Old 05-18-2013, 08:05 AM
 
Location: Rochester, N.Y
2,725 posts, read 3,906,567 times
Reputation: 4649
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prescious View Post
Hi guys I have a dilemma for you and I would like your advice. To make a long story short, my husband and I have been married for about 2 months and we are on vacation here in India. He is Indian btw, anyway we went up to the hills the other day and we were looking for a room and we saw a young girl around 18 and he asked her about a room and she was like ok I will show you MY HUSBAND around and that I ME can stay there and she and my husband will go and look for the room and for me to rest. But I was like no I want to come because I need the exercise

Anyway the next day we went walking and we met into the 18 year old girls brother and he and my husband were talking and stuff and then they wanted to go back up to the hills where they live with his 18 year old sister that girl that showed us around the other day. So my husband was like come with us but me I was like no baby I want to stay here. And he was like you sure and I was like yes. So that was around 6:30pm in the evening and he came back around 9pm that night. When he came back, he seemed different or strange. I couldn't put my finger on it. Almost distant like his mind was somewhere else and I was like you ok? And he was like Yes. But it was just words because his face and just his ora seemed different. Like his mind was somewhere else. Anyway that night we went to bed and do you know the very next morning he got up and went straight back up them hills? He said he tried waking me up to come with him I think I remember him pushing me but I was tired. Anyway when I finally got up I realized that he was not there at 9:30am and so I called him and asked him, where are you? And he was kind of stumbling like well you know dear I tried waking you up to come with me. I'm like come with you where? Where are you? And he said that he is at Aunties house. Auntie is the 18 year old girls mother that he calls Auntie. So I was like what the hell is so important up in those hills that you wake up early in the morning to go back up there from last night? So he was trying to give excuses. And so I said, You know what, stay there, I'm leaving and going back to America. And he kept trying to explain but I hung up the phone on him

Let me tell you that those hills from where we are staying is at least 30 minutes away from our hotel, that guy got to my hotel room in literally like 10 minutes. I really don't know how he did that. But he grabbed the internet stick away from me to stop me from calling the airlines. And I was like I don't know what is so important that you leave early in the morning to go back up to those hills. So I asked him, are you having sex with somebody up there or with that 18 year old girl. And he said no, I swear and that he just loves going up there because Auntie is Punjabi just like him and the part of INdia that we are in is for foreigners and not Indians from Punjab.

Anyway ever since that day May 6, 2013 when he came in that night, he seemed different. Now let me tell you something else. He does take me up there with him everytime he goes up there. But I sense this 18 year old girl is too friendly with him. Right in front of me. BUT in all sincerity, she is friendly with all the guys and foreigners there. But he just met this girl the other day and calls her his sister. And that I am crazy and nasty. He says here is India once you say someone is your sister, they don't even think of anything sexual like that. He says that my mind is very dirty. It's not that my mind is dirty, It's just that I know men. Then she's gonna tell me that I must trust him Also right in front of me, she asks me for his skype Id, and at first I was like ok but then I asked her why and she was like WHY NOT HE IS MY BROTHER. So at that time my husband was high on marijuana it is legal to smoke it there and he said to her, the reason why is because she don't trust me and I was like that is not true and she was like ok alright it is ok no fighting.

Also ever since that day May 6, 2013 those people in the hills act like they own my husband. The mother he calls Auntie, that 18 year old girl and the brother. Constantly calling him and if he does not go because I don't feel comfortable with him going up to the hills to be around that 18 year old girl, then those people get angry WHY. Perfect example is when he was leaving the hills because I told him to stay that and I'm going back to America, The Auntie mother woman said why are you going and he said because my wife and she said SO. And then he said, I'm sorry I got to go. These people don't respect me. What the hell is going on. And now last night there was the brothers birthday party and we did not go and they kept calling him like crazy and he said that he is not going and I heard him in the bathroom talking to the 18 year old girl lets call her Priya and it looked like he was trying to explain and then it seemed like she might have hung up the phone because next thing you know he stopped saying Priya Priya and then all of a sudden he started saying Auntie and was explaining to Auntie.
After he got off the phone, he said to me, WE ARE GOING TO THAT PARTY. And I said," No I am not going. And he started yelling and then all of a sudden he said," GO BACK HOME TO AMERICA AND I WILL SEND YOU ONE PAPER AND YOU SIGN IT FOR A DIVORCE and I was like WHAT? HE WAS LIKE BOOK YOUR TICKET NOW. I started crying and was like ok I will and I will leave you alone but as I was crying I said you are very ungrateful and what goes around will come around. So as I was booking my ticket he stopped me and said that he loved me and that not to go. He was angry. That was yesterday. Do you know all day today this man's mind is somewhere else. Looking into the ceiling, blank stares into the wall. What the hell is going on? His mind does not seem to be here with me at all. I ask him are you ok what's wrong and he keeps telling me nothing. Nothing. Keep in mind that I've done alot of things for this man. His family abandoned him. When he was in trouble nobody was there for him but me. I've helped him out with money. How can he put his attention on people he just met a week ago and he has known me for 3 years?[SIZE=5]What the hell is going on guys can you please tell me and also tell me what do you think I should do thanks. I really need all your replies. Thanks[/SIZE]

If he's not cheating he might as well be. He seems like a crappy husband no offense. Seems to take you for granite and that is probably not what you want. Do yourself a favor and run..If he can tell you to sign papers that quick, then he doesn't understand what a "relationship" is..

Good luck. You seem like a very nice, caring person. I hope things get better for you.
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Old 05-18-2013, 09:07 AM
 
426 posts, read 426,864 times
Reputation: 466
make him get a checkup when u get back home.
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Old 05-18-2013, 09:11 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
37,481 posts, read 36,330,237 times
Reputation: 70562
Is this really how you're supposed to vacation in India??

Just go up into "the hills," wander around and ask strange 18-year-old girls, who are known worldwide as experts in international lodging , if they know about any ROOMS??

You say he's FROM INDIA, yet he made no arrangements in advance for you to have a place to stay??

I did read the whole thing, unfortunately. Your story is just too weird to be believable.

One thing I will say ... at least you didn't begin your post with, "OK, so ...."
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Old 05-18-2013, 10:41 AM
 
6,451 posts, read 9,360,542 times
Reputation: 10718
Drop the "he was like" and "I was like"'s and I'll bother to get more than 1/4 of the way thru your post.
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