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How significant are looks to you, as a part of your attraction to your partner? Is it mainly the shape of their body that makes you want to have sex with them, or does other stuff play a big role? If so, what? And how much of a role?
im just creeping up on 13 years...not quite 15 yet, so feel free to look over my post if need be.
for me,
with my wife im still extremely physically attracted to her (specifically figure and face) so its the first thing that i will always notice to "kick things off" but its her charm, nature and personality that end up taking it the whole way.
its practically a 50/50 split of importance to one another since one never happens without the other. physical traits just happen to be in the forfront since they do not require interaction to get the full scope of...just a some working eyes
How significant are looks to you, as a part of your attraction to your partner? Is it mainly the shape of their body that makes you want to have sex with them, or does other stuff play a big role? If so, what? And how much of a role?
My parents have been happily married for over 30 years. (interracial marriage) My mom told me once that sex is not everything, (whatever that means) My dad told myy brother once that he would consider taking viagra if he had to because he wanted to satisfy my mom (whatever that means)
Well, my mom depends on botox to stay young, my dad still works out on daily basis. But I don't think they really care about "looks" anymore to be completely honest. They just want to stay young as long as they can.
It certainly grosses us out thinking about our parents' sex life. But I guess older folks are worrying about losing their looks as well, so I try to be sensitive.
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 05-18-2013 at 01:30 PM..
My wife has a very lovely body (5'7, 115-120), and I appreciate it. But that's not the most important thing to me by far. It's her smile, her laugh, her touch and her gentle ways that really attract me. Those long and luscious legs are very nice, but it's what's above the shoulders that gets me. I've felt that way about any woman I've cared for from the time I was 16. Most have been physically beautiful, and I suppose that's been the initial attraction, but my interest quickly turns to the heart and mind.
My wife has a very lovely body (5'7, 115-120), and I appreciate it. But that's not the most important thing to me by far. It's her smile, her laugh, her touch and her gentle ways that really attract me. Those long and luscious legs are very nice, but it's what's above the shoulders that gets me. I've felt that way about any woman I've cared for from the time I was 16. Most have been physically beautiful, and I suppose that's been the initial attraction, but my interest quickly turns to the heart and mind.
This is the ideal relationship that I am looking for. You are very lucky, your wife sounds lovely.
How significant are looks to you, as a part of your attraction to your partner? Is it mainly the shape of their body that makes you want to have sex with them, or does other stuff play a big role? If so, what? And how much of a role?
For me looks are important for the "initial" attraction. However, If in time my gf loses her looks. Then I will still love her. Because looks "intially" attract, it is the heart, soul, how they treat you that make you want them still. We all are going to lose our looks someday, what's left is what counts..If you love someone, you love them inside and out. So, when they lose their looks, it's not really going to matter. If you truly love them..
After 33 years, DH and I are still trying to look the best we can, considering a bit of fat and sagging. We do not look as good as we used to, but we still make each other laugh and are on the same wave length about most things.
For me looks are important for the "initial" attraction. However, If in time my gf loses her looks. Then I will still love her. Because looks "intially" attract, it is the heart, soul, how they treat you that make you want them still. We all are going to lose our looks someday, what's left is what counts..If you love someone, you love them inside and out. So, when they lose their looks, it's not really going to matter. If you truly love them..
My sister in law was a professional model and her looks has been her everything. I don't think she views the world like the rest of us do. Her biggest fear is losing her look. It doesn't matter how much my brother reassured her that he loved her, she somehow just doesn't believe it.
Well, When you browse through the threads on city-data relationship forum, you see people posting questions like "Are my standards too high" "Will you date a girl like her?" "Eating habits turned me off", I kind of wonder what exactly are people's standards when it comes to dating and marriage.
It is hard not to have some kind of insecurities about oneself knowing everything is a turn off nowadays.
My family paid a lot of attention on appearance, we couldn't help it. Growing up, everything is always all about looks. I can understand where my sister in law is going through 100%. She is in her 40s now, and perhaps is going through some kind of hormonal changes. It is not easy to see her husband (my brother) been approached by hot women in their 20s. She although was a model, has never been approached by any men.
I am still in my 20s, but in 15 years, I would have to worry about menopause, mid age crisis. I am not worry about losing my looks now, but I cannot deny the nagging thought of losing my looks hasn't crossed my mind.
We all have our insecurities, no matter how old or young we are. It is painful to see my sister in law going through identity crisis. Her whole life is about looks, even though she is a very sweet mature person, I don't think she can ever see herself as a valuable person to her husband (my brother). Her insecurity has created a lot of doubts in my brother's marriage. I wish I have some wisdom to share to help them out, but I know I don't.
My Grandparents were in their 80's and still having fun so that tells me that looks definitely are not everything in a relationship. They were married for about 60 years (I don't remember exactly how long) before my Grandpa passed away and my entire life they absolutely adored each other and always treated each other with respect and showed their love in lots of little ways.
My sister in law was a professional model and her looks has been her everything. I don't think she views the world like the rest of us do. Her biggest fear is losing her look. It doesn't matter how much my brother reassured her that he loved her, she somehow just doesn't believe it.
Well, When you browse through the threads on city-data relationship forum, you see people posting questions like "Are my standards too high" "Will you date a girl like her?" "Eating habits turned me off", I kind of wonder what exactly are people's standards when it comes to dating and marriage.
It is hard not to have some kind of insecurities about oneself knowing everything is a turn off nowadays.
My family paid a lot of attention on appearance, we couldn't help it. Growing up, everything is always all about looks. I can understand where my sister in law is going through 100%. She is in her 40s now, and perhaps is going through some kind of hormonal changes. It is not easy to see her husband (my brother) been approached by hot women in their 20s. She although was a model, has never been approached by any men.
I am still in my 20s, but in 15 years, I would have to worry about menopause, mid age crisis. I am not worry about losing my looks now, but I cannot deny the nagging thought of losing my looks hasn't crossed my mind.
We all have our insecurities, no matter how old or young we are. It is painful to see my sister in law going through identity crisis. Her whole life is about looks, even though she is a very sweet mature person, I don't think she can ever see herself as a valuable person to her husband (my brother). Her insecurity has created a lot of doubts in my brother's marriage. I wish I have some wisdom to share to help them out, but I know I don't.
This is true. I think that when you truly love someone, it should be this way. No matter who you are, you are going to lose your looks. Perhaps your sister and law had a huge issue with this. Perhaps her whole life was wrapped around "looking good" and when that starts to go/ factoring in menopause, she didn't know how to handle it..Perhaps, it is more difficult for her since she was a model..
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