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Where do you hang out with a woman when you want to talk? Hanging out and talking probably hasn't changed in 60 or 70 years.
So wouldn't that be a date? You go out for a beer or drinks or dinner or something? At least, I would define that as going out on dates even if you didn't meet him on a date.
I dated from 1974-1982. It was through school/work/friends that I met everyone and involved lot's of phone conversations (luckily I had my own phone in my bedroom so privacy wasn't an issue). Cars were the main place to mess around until someone got their own place. Sex wasn't something me or my friends jumped into...we took the long road there (you can do a lot while building up to actually having sex...some of the best times ever!) and people miss so much by jumping into it too fast. I moved out in part because I wanted to get on the pill and sleep with my then-boyfriend, and I wouldn't have DREAMED of doing that while living with my parents since I didn't want them knowing what I was up to! I'd have been mortified! HAHA! But even a "good girl" like me managed to get a little action, and have a one night stand, before meeting the guy I ended up marrying.
And seriously, who needs to shave everything? TMI? Some guys today just don't know what a woman looks like.
In the 80s and 90s, I though 'dating' was something people used to do in the olden days. Like in the 50s. I never heard of anyone doing it in modern times.
So wouldn't that be a date? You go out for a beer or drinks or dinner or something? At least, I would define that as going out on dates even if you didn't meet him on a date.
Well, yeah, but these days they don't always call it a date, they call it hanging out. Like if you go over to her place, and she makes lunch or dinner, or visa versa, or you're just having coffee or tea and a snack and talking. Or you leave the group or the group breaks up for the day, and you take a walk together. Is that a date? At what point does hanging out end and a date begins? What if three of you decide to leave the group and go for a walk together, and stop at a coffee shop? Is that a date or hanging out, still?
Some aspects of this informal courting process can be nebulous. We had a whole thread on that awhile ago; there's been some media attention to the drift away from formal dating toward "hanging out", or inviting someone to join a group activity, and how confusing that can be for women. It's nothing new, though, it's been around for a long time, except it was more spontaneous before. I think it probably started in the 60's hippie era, when communal living became popular in some parts of the country.
Well, yeah, but these days they don't always call it a date, they call it hanging out. Like if you go over to her place, and she makes lunch or dinner, or visa versa, or you're just having coffee or tea and a snack and talking. Or you leave the group or the group breaks up for the day, and you take a walk together. Is that a date? At what point does hanging out end and a date begins? What if three of you decide to go for a walk together, and stop at a coffee shop? Is that a date or hanging out?
Some aspects of this informal courting process can be nebulous. We had a whole thread on that awhile ago; there's been some media attention to the drift away from formal dating toward "hanging out", or inviting someone to join a group activity, and how confusing that can be for women. It's nothing new, though, it's been around for a long time, except it was more spontaneous before. I think it probably started in the 60's hippie era, when communal living became popular in some parts of the country.
If it's two people with a romantic interest, hanging out alone, it's a variation of a date in my mind.
My friends were few and all girls when I was a teenager. I saw guys at the half-pipe and skateboarding parks. But if they approached, I usually tried to score weed and left. I didn't have much experience talking to guys when I was younger with all the moving and the group thing just never happened. Might have been nice to have that kind of back up.
Are you talking about Maine? On the West Coast houses had phones on each floor. I'm told that by the 70's some teenagers had phones in their own room, in addition to the phone in the parents' room and the phone in the kitchen on the main floor. Few people were phone-deprived back then. Now back in the 40's, I imagine that was a 1 phone per household time, In the 1st half of the 20th Century, people had "party lines", meaning a phone line shared by neighbors. So you might pick up the phone to call someone, and the neighbor would be on the line. You had to wait until they were done, or if it was an emergency, ask them to free up the line.
I grew up in various parts of Ohio in the eighties, and the great majority of families that I knew only
had one phone. I can't think of anybody that I knew that had more than two. Maybe this is
something that was a regional variation? Not saying that there weren't families in Ohio that
had three or more lines, of course, but maybe the likelihood of that occuring varied significantly
from place to place. Interesting question.
I am sure it depends but from what I heard from my parents and my wife's parents, the late 70s and early 80s were some wild times. Some older people I've talked to said that by the 90s and on it was almost like Victorian Era times by comparison to the anything goes 70s and early 80s.
Something tells me that there was a big counter-counter cultural shift brought on by the Reagan administration that was also engineered by some higher ups who hated the free spirit of the late 60s and 70s. By the mid to late 80s, that All American consumerist culture of the 50s was back.
Anyone notice that most of the mid to late 80s movies and music had a nostalgia for the 50s? It's similar to how there was a 60s/70s craze for a while during the late 90s, early 2000s and how today there is a big 80s craze?
AIDS, fear of which reached reached paranoia level due to the newness of the disease and lack of knowledge, both at the individual and at the scientific levels,
dampened things tremendously in the 80s. I can recall hearing many people at the time citing this as being the main reason why they weren't as sexually active as they would have been in earlier years. People feared that it could be transmitted through mosquito bites,
sharing toilet seats, casual contact such as merely touching an infected person, etc. Parents would panic if they believed that atudent attending the same school as there children had it.
And for many years there were no effective treatments. None. An HIV diagnosis was a guaranteed death sentence. And for however much time you had left you would be treated like a leper, possibly even by friends and family members, since due to lack of knowlege and understanding of the disease most people would be deathly afraid that you would transmit it to them somehow.
We have came a long way. Maybe you have to have lived through that time period to truly understand
the fear that surrounded the disease through much of the eighties and the degree to which it shaped many
people's behavior.
Their was a definite swing toward conservatism such as you described, but in terms of the
nation's attitudes and behaviors toward sex, that swing was largely driven by the fear of AIDS. Countering
what they believing to be neglect by the Reagan administration in promoting and funding AIDS research
amd awareness was a major focus of those who advocated for those who suffered from HIV.
I remember that many televangelists, polticians of a certain bent, and others of their ilk who, as you say opposed the freewheeling
style of.the preceeding decades , took full advantage of this is to push their agendas.
Last edited by robertbrianbush; 12-12-2013 at 06:51 AM..
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