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For the relevance of this post, I am 23 years old and studying a master's program. This is my second master.
My question is for your opinions.
With all my friends getting married or engaged and with me not even having a bf/steady relationship/dates for that matter sometimes makes me nervous. I am a very social person and I go out with my friends all the time but at times I tend to think that I will never meet anyone. I have had only one relationship that last for 2 years.
My observations when I go out: Guys usually don't approach me, Idk why or if I am intimidating. I think I am pretty good looking. The ones who approach me are either creepy or not my type.
I prefer guys with diversity in personality and someone who can engage in variety of topics.
Is something wrong with me that I don't find anyone, am I being VERY choosy? or I should not panic just yet.
I don't go on dates very often because I don't find men interesting enough. What can be done to change my scene?
I am not desperate neither do I go hook up with guys but I think it's good to have someone who cares about you, spend weekends with etc etc. But the frequency of meeting interesting men with me is very slow.
Like I told my friend E, who is 28yo "Don't start to get nervous until you are on your deathbed". For now howl at the moon without abandon, be spontaneous, live without regrets, and enjoy the ride.
I am rather more nervous about something being wrong with me. I don't want to get married or anything anytime soon, I am only surprised because I think am not a dumb girl and I fail to attract men who are NOT just looking for hook ups and are decent enough. I thought about joining one of those online dating sites but my ego doesn't let me do it, nothing against those sites but I think there are more creeps on those sites than actual decent guys and I honestly believe in more normal ways of meeting new people.
I tend to think it's the other way around. I think that men in their 20s who want a serious relationship, not just a hookup, find one via online dating.
That's because most women and men at that age just want the hookup, and online dating lets you screen them out.
Try out OKCupid. Answer at least 100 of the match questions, don't reply to the 95% of guys who message you but aren't a good match, and send messages yourself to the ones who are.
OP, 23 is very young to have a lot of friends getting married or engaged already. I would have a hard time believing that, unless you live in a very traditional part of the country.
There's nothing wrong with you. Probably you're very intelligent and have trouble finding men who are on your level. Be patient. Since you're still in grad school, you may meet someone through classes or campus activities. Get involved in a group or club, or some kind of outdoor activity group in the community, like hiking or working on a community vegetable garden, or whatever the options are in your school or community that appeal to you. Work on meeting more people in real life. When you're involved in an activity with someone, there's a natural opportunity to get to know everyone in a low-key way, without anyone having to do a cold approach. Friendships can develop naturally.
It's my best friends I am referring to here. And I don't think there's an 'official age' to get married. I think it just happens and I have nothing against people marrying early, it's their choice. So one of my best friends just got engaged and the other one has been dating the same guy for 3 years. So with them I am always the third wheel and on fb I keep seeing people changing status's haha which is why I felt a bit pressurized. I know I am still young but like I said, it's good to have someone waiting for you and spend time with.
I do think I am quite intelligent but come on, there are smart men out there too, its just that I don't meet them hahaha. Also, I think guys do like smart women so yeah what goes wrong in my case god knows.
For the relevance of this post, I am 23 years old and studying a master's program. This is my second master.
My question is for your opinions.
With all my friends getting married or engaged and with me not even having a bf/steady relationship/dates for that matter sometimes makes me nervous. I am a very social person and I go out with my friends all the time but at times I tend to think that I will never meet anyone. I have had only one relationship that last for 2 years.
My observations when I go out: Guys usually don't approach me, Idk why or if I am intimidating. I think I am pretty good looking. The ones who approach me are either creepy or not my type.
I prefer guys with diversity in personality and someone who can engage in variety of topics.
Is something wrong with me that I don't find anyone, am I being VERY choosy? or I should not panic just yet.
I don't go on dates very often because I don't find men interesting enough. What can be done to change my scene?
I am not desperate neither do I go hook up with guys but I think it's good to have someone who cares about you, spend weekends with etc etc. But the frequency of meeting interesting men with me is very slow.
Any advices? Are/were you in a similar situation?
There is something wrong with everyone in someone's opinion. Have you thought maybe you have been too busy with your studies to really put yourself out there much? Maybe quit comparing yourself to your friends and let life happen and quit worrying with all the "what if's".
It's my best friends I am referring to here. And I don't think there's an 'official age' to get married. I think it just happens and I have nothing against people marrying early, it's their choice. So one of my best friends just got engaged and the other one has been dating the same guy for 3 years. So with them I am always the third wheel and on fb I keep seeing people changing status's haha which is why I felt a bit pressurized. I know I am still young but like I said, it's good to have someone waiting for you and spend time with.
I do think I am quite intelligent but come on, there are smart men out there too, its just that I don't meet them hahaha. Also, I think guys do like smart women so yeah what goes wrong in my case god knows.
Agreed, there is no official age to get married. It's just that in some parts of the US, it would be very unusual for someone to have all their best friends already married or engaged at 23.
There are smart men out there, but not very many. And among those smart men, not all are mature at 23 or even 25 or 26. Some have emotional baggage that would make them unmarriageable. Others might not have much, if anything, in common with you. It's not easy to find a match at any age, or even to find someone you'd be remotely interested in dating. But you're starting a new graduate program, so something may turn up in the course of that. Also, as I mentioned before, do what you can to circulate and meet new people outside of your program. Do you have any opportunity to do internships?
you might be limiting yourself quite a bit if you insist on someone who is "on your level" intellectually. there are plenty of smart, loving men who just aren't into academic stuff
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