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Old 05-29-2013, 09:47 PM
 
Location: South Florida
315 posts, read 396,630 times
Reputation: 162

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Hi everyone,
I am so sorry this type of post and it must have been made for the millionth time though I would love to get input on my specific type of situation.
I recently moved to a new town and had to pick up any job I get which is in retail. My orientation was back in February and it was a group orientation of me and about 6 other guys. There was this guy there that really caught my eye, he just seemed interesting. Also a college grad looking for some work (being educated is a real turn on for me).
So anyways all of us there were all asked to say something about ourselves in a circle and we would go one by one. I started first and I mentioned something that this guy, let's say his name is Phillip shared in common with me. Actually more than a few things are shared in common with him and I. At orientation Phillip mentioned the fact that he had a girlfriend and that he would go into the store with her all the time.
Why I bring this up now is because I have suddenly became more attracted to him. In the beginning I told myself, "well he is attractive but that is it, he has a girlfriend" Since these few months have passed we would occasionally talk or say "Hi". But most of the time I see him constantly staring at me! Like he cannot take his eyes off me and he stares at me with this blank stare. I am not sure what that means. He does not really smile, just stares blankly. I will look back at him and not smile sometimes and sometimes when I am not thinking I will just smile at him and then I would quickly look away. I think I have became more attracted to him because of this type of attention that he is giving me but I am unsure how to respond to it.
I think it is unhealthy for him to keep staring at me like that especially if he has a girlfriend but I do like the attention. I am curious if he still has a girlfriend, it has been a few months but then I think to myself that he might still have her and be happy with his relationship. But he totally stares at me all the time. Maybe it could mean nothing but I never heard of anyone staring at someone and not finding anything attractive about the person.
We work in different departments and every time he walks by he just stares. We do not really have matching schedules where I could catch him in the break room and get to know him more and recently we were talking and he mentioned that he may leave the job soon. My response was "I don't know what to say about that".. because I really didn't.
I would like your thoughts on this situation because I am unsure what to do. I am super friendly towards him but I am afraid he might still have his girl, I do not want to seem desperate. But this staring thing means something, right?
Thanks.
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Old 05-29-2013, 09:52 PM
 
86 posts, read 122,731 times
Reputation: 49
he wants you to make the first move this way if he cheats on his girlfriend he can say you come on to him.
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Old 05-29-2013, 10:24 PM
 
775 posts, read 514,853 times
Reputation: 494
All men, married or not, look at other women. ALL of 'em. Doesnt mean he wants to hook up or dump his girlfriend and start a relationship with you. It means he likes looking.
And what do you care if its "unhealthy" or not that he looks at you? Just means that if you did end up in a relationship with him you would be jealous and worried when he does it again to another woman

Last edited by Copsgirl73; 05-29-2013 at 11:17 PM..
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Old 05-29-2013, 10:37 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
13,685 posts, read 10,914,334 times
Reputation: 23173
Either he needs glasses or is really bad at flirting. I doubt it's both.

I do think you are reading WAY too much into this.
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Old 05-29-2013, 10:49 PM
 
Location: New Haven, CT
907 posts, read 1,125,714 times
Reputation: 755
I would be bold

Catch him looking at you and get up and go over to him. Ask him whats wrong lol.

Something like "dont you have a girlfriend?", If he says yes then tell him to stop teasing you

If he says no then the coast is clear and ask him to a drink.

Stir it up a bit, just dont get in trouble by your employer lol

Im saying be bold because of the way your describing how this guy is looking at you. Its either really creepy or hes in dreamland only imagining this actually happening.


He might be high on drugs lol
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Old 05-29-2013, 11:05 PM
 
Location: Miami, FL
3,440 posts, read 3,223,905 times
Reputation: 2121
Quote:
Originally Posted by ybflady13 View Post
Hi everyone,
I am so sorry this type of post and it must have been made for the millionth time though I would love to get input on my specific type of situation.
I recently moved to a new town and had to pick up any job I get which is in retail. My orientation was back in February and it was a group orientation of me and about 6 other guys. There was this guy there that really caught my eye, he just seemed interesting. Also a college grad looking for some work (being educated is a real turn on for me).
So anyways all of us there were all asked to say something about ourselves in a circle and we would go one by one. I started first and I mentioned something that this guy, let's say his name is Phillip shared in common with me. Actually more than a few things are shared in common with him and I. At orientation Phillip mentioned the fact that he had a girlfriend and that he would go into the store with her all the time.
Why I bring this up now is because I have suddenly became more attracted to him. In the beginning I told myself, "well he is attractive but that is it, he has a girlfriend" Since these few months have passed we would occasionally talk or say "Hi". But most of the time I see him constantly staring at me! Like he cannot take his eyes off me and he stares at me with this blank stare. I am not sure what that means. He does not really smile, just stares blankly. I will look back at him and not smile sometimes and sometimes when I am not thinking I will just smile at him and then I would quickly look away. I think I have became more attracted to him because of this type of attention that he is giving me but I am unsure how to respond to it.
I think it is unhealthy for him to keep staring at me like that especially if he has a girlfriend but I do like the attention. I am curious if he still has a girlfriend, it has been a few months but then I think to myself that he might still have her and be happy with his relationship. But he totally stares at me all the time. Maybe it could mean nothing but I never heard of anyone staring at someone and not finding anything attractive about the person.
We work in different departments and every time he walks by he just stares. We do not really have matching schedules where I could catch him in the break room and get to know him more and recently we were talking and he mentioned that he may leave the job soon. My response was "I don't know what to say about that".. because I really didn't.
I would like your thoughts on this situation because I am unsure what to do. I am super friendly towards him but I am afraid he might still have his girl, I do not want to seem desperate. But this staring thing means something, right?
Thanks.
You have a crush on him but you're trying to make it seem like only he has the interest in you.

Why can't you ladies find a single man???
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Old 05-30-2013, 12:41 AM
 
Location: Where Dance Music comes first
1,863 posts, read 1,437,072 times
Reputation: 2154
DO NOT PURSUE! Nuff said.
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Old 05-30-2013, 06:57 AM
 
Location: Norcross, GA
1,041 posts, read 566,033 times
Reputation: 896
He might think you're pretty, or you might remind him of a long lost friend/love. If you guys are acquainted already then the staring is a teeny bit less creepy. If he is attached, then friendzone him.... or keep things very casual and slightly distant.

The prize for getting a guy to cheat on his girlfriend is....(drum roll)... that you end up dating a cheater!
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Old 05-30-2013, 12:42 PM
 
Location: Hilo, Hawaii
4,557 posts, read 2,482,145 times
Reputation: 6592
agreed, if you pursue this, you're no better than a cheater yourself.
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Old 05-30-2013, 12:52 PM
 
Location: Alaska
5,154 posts, read 9,519,015 times
Reputation: 3505
Are there other female workers or customers? If so, observe him when he hasn't seen you. You may find he does the same thing to other women, meaning his staring at you is nothing special.
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