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^^ Ms. Lilac, you are clearly a hard-core feminist. You are not my target market, so I'm sure we will disagree on pretty much everything because feminism defined itself in opposition to traditional femininity and destroyed it in the 60s, 70s, and 80s.
Apparently it is "laziness" now to want the kind of wife my grandfather had. And "narcissistic". Ridiculous.
I think the word you're looking for is not so much "lazy" or "narcissistic" as "unrealistic."
You don't life in the same society your grandfather lived in.
The women you have to choose from do not live in the same society your grandmother did.
You can wish all you like that the world is the same now as it was then, but it's not, and it isn't producing the same people with the same beliefs, wants, goals, or aspirations. Deal with it.
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Great post. I am not looking for the childlike woman, but for my equal, in intelligence and in other traits. And absolutely it is true that it all starts from within- what kind of people you attract comes from who you are within. If you are a good person within, people will WANT to do things for you. Forcing never works. Very good insight here.
Any woman who is your equal (or, in fact exceeds you in these areas) is not going to be interested in being treated like something less than an equal. When you are aspiring to "run someone's life," you are not treating them as an equal, so I'm unsure why you'd claim that that's what you're looking for.
^^ Ms. Lilac, you are clearly a hard-core feminist. You are not my target market, so I'm sure we will disagree on pretty much everything because feminism defined itself in opposition to traditional femininity and destroyed it in the 60s, 70s, and 80s.
Be sure to write back and let us all know how referring to potential partners as "your target market" works out for you. Are you sure you don't want to call them "applicants?"
You were doing fine until you got to the very end of your OP, with the phrase "legitimately womanly woman."
#1 Not fitting your list of "wants" does not make OTHER women less womanly. In your book or anyone else's.
By using the phrase womanly woman, I was distinguishing from a woman with a lack of femininity, which I would find difficult to take seriously or legitimately.
Be sure to write back and let us all know how referring to potential partners as "your target market" works out for you. Are you sure you don't want to call them "applicants?"
You know, you have a very bad attitude for a woman
^^ Ms. Lilac, you are clearly a hard-core feminist. You are not my target market, so I'm sure we will disagree on pretty much everything because feminism defined itself in opposition to traditional femininity and destroyed it in the 60s, 70s, and 80s.
You have no idea what feminism is. Feminism is believing women have the same rights as men. Sure there are radicals, but even the most conservative women I know believe women should have choices such as career. Men like you though hate it because women don't need to depend on men to support them. You remind me of my friend who feels the same as you. He's now married to a woman who caters to him but he is miserable and tells me how he wishes she looked like me and that he fantasizing about me.
I think the word you're looking for is not so much "lazy" or "narcissistic" as "unrealistic."
You don't life in the same society your grandfather lived in.
The women you have to choose from do not live in the same society your grandmother did.
You can wish all you like that the world is the same now as it was then, but it's not, and it isn't producing the same people with the same beliefs, wants, goals, or aspirations. Deal with it.
It's a complete shame. Hopefully there are still a handful who think like me.
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Originally Posted by TabulaRasa
Any woman who is your equal (or, in fact exceeds you in these areas) is not going to be interested in being treated like something less than an equal. When you are aspiring to "run someone's life," you are not treating them as an equal, so I'm unsure why you'd claim that that's what you're looking for.
Let me put it another way: Equal means she's just as good at being a woman as I am at being a man.
By using the phrase womanly woman, I was distinguishing from a woman with a lack of femininity, which I would find difficult to take seriously or legitimately.
Good post, though; thanks.
And what is femininity to you? Being submissive? Obeying a man? Being quiet and not being heard?
All we need now is a discussion of masculine feet.
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Originally Posted by josephkonrad
^^ Ms. Lilac, you are clearly a hard-core feminist. You are not my target market, so I'm sure we will disagree on pretty much everything because feminism defined itself in opposition to traditional femininity and destroyed it in the 60s, 70s, and 80s.
Yep, that's me, with my shaved head, Birkenstocks, hairy legs, and flannel.
Look, kiddo, you come on here asking about realistic expectations. I'm old enough to be your mother, and I'm telling you, as the vast majority of people here are telling you, that you are being unrealistic. The chances of you finding an emotionally healthy, secure woman like what you describe in anything other than the Third World or a mail order situation are nearly infinitesimal--and even then, you'd just be a meal ticket.
You know why? Because most Baby Boomers and early Gen-Xers--the parents of the women in your dating pool--did not raise their daughters to be shrinking violets. You're looking for the daughters of women who either fought in the sexual revolution or were born during it. Baby Boomers rejected your grandmother's way. Gen-Xers never knew it: our mothers worked.
But please, by all means, sit around lamenting something that died out three generations ago. Go out on your mission, and, like I said earlier, come back in 5 years and let us know how it went.
Men like you though hate it because women don't need to depend on men to support them.
No, I dislike it because it leads to problems raising children and providing a stable home.
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All we need now is a discussion of masculine feet.
