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Old 05-31-2013, 04:51 PM
 
149 posts, read 205,966 times
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I've been dating a friend for a little over two months. We talk every day and really like spending time with each other. He lives with his mom, sister, and sister's husband/son. I live alone. I want to have him over for a movie night/some alone time, as I like spending time with him.

However, I'm still fairly new to the city I live in and haven't completely finished furnishing my place; I have a studio. Some of my stuff is still boxed up and I only have a convertible sofa and mattress; my bed frame hasn't even arrived yet so the mattress is just sitting behind the couch unwrapped.

He does usually take me out on the weekends. One time he suggested a hotel so I didn't have to leave his area late one Saturday night but I declined because I had only known him for like 2 weeks at the time. But I honestly only want to be in his space, watch movies and spend alone time together privately. I've been out of town for a week and haven't seen him in close to two weeks so I was thinking about getting a hotel room tomorrow but don't want him to get the wrong idea because I'm not ready for sex with him yet. I'm just anal about allowing people in my home if it's not "visitor friendly" yet. Should I just wait until my place is ready to accommodate visitors (that'll be in about another month when I'm done furnishing)? I know this seems like a crazy idea/suggestion..........
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Arizona
3,763 posts, read 6,675,067 times
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Well honestly from a guys POV if you get a hotel he will expect to get some.
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:16 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM
13,290 posts, read 15,229,314 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InNeedOfAdvice View Post
I've been dating a friend for a little over two months ... I was thinking about getting a hotel room tomorrow but don't want him to get the wrong idea because I'm not ready for sex with him yet.
You've been dating for two months and you haven't discussed sex yet? In my experience most people have sex before two months.

I agree with the above poster who says he may be expecting it.

If you want to get a room together, I'd have a talk first.
But I'd also be fine with someone coming over to my place
So, I guess we're all different
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:24 PM
 
149 posts, read 205,966 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok View Post
You've been dating for two months and you haven't discussed sex yet? In my experience most people have sex before two months.

I agree with the above poster who says he may be expecting it.

If you want to get a room together, I'd have a talk first.
But I'd also be fine with someone coming over to my place
So, I guess we're all different
No, we haven't...I haven't felt ready to with him yet. It varies from person to person, you know? I've had one boyfriend I never had sex with, and I've had a one night stand or two in my life as well.

Part of the problem is I hate the new place I have. It's the smallest and oldest place I've ever lived in, but I chose it because it was cheaper and I could afford grad school easier living here for a year or two. I have a friend or two from work that keep hinting for me to invite them over for drinks/hanging out/etc. but I refuse to have anyone over because I feel like my place is not up to my own standards For the first time in my life I feel like my living situation is affecting my social life.
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:48 PM
 
22,284 posts, read 21,594,109 times
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Why the hell would you get a hotel room together if you are not planning to have sex?! Oh yes, I forgot....cuddling. Guys love that.
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:51 PM
 
Location: Toronto
2,159 posts, read 2,800,502 times
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No. Don't get a hotel room.
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Old 05-31-2013, 06:00 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,961 posts, read 17,234,122 times
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I agree, hotel=sex (especially for a guy) I understand, Im quite anal inviting women over to my place too. I rather go to her place; which I usually do. However, Im not into dating for a relationship.

wait till your place is ready, or not, if hes cool, he wouldn't mind an unfurnished pad.
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Old 05-31-2013, 06:07 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,480 posts, read 24,963,132 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monemi View Post
No. Don't get a hotel room.
I agree.
Invite him to your place or do not but don't get a hotel room if you aren't planning on having sex.
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Old 05-31-2013, 06:08 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 7,208,089 times
Reputation: 11987
First of all - where the heck is your bed?

Did you move from the Artic Circle or something?

Unpack your stuff and make the space your own, or move somewhere you like better.

The guy knows he's dating a broke student. He'll be happy to shag you on the floorboards if he's into you...he might even help you out with some stuff/cash.
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Old 05-31-2013, 08:03 PM
 
149 posts, read 205,966 times
Reputation: 106
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
Why the hell would you get a hotel room together if you are not planning to have sex?! Oh yes, I forgot....cuddling. Guys love that.
Guys don't like cuddling?
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