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- Genuienly Altruistic
- Not concerned with the Joneses
- Nurturing/Sweet/Feminine
- An avid adventurer/not a pansy about breaking nails, etc.
- Unentitled
- Not obsessed with decadence/fairly wholesome
- Live music connoisseur
- Creative in general with a ride range of interests
- Soft spoken and mild mannered
- Intellectually curious
- Well informed on politics (may have different views than mine, as long as we are able to engage in lively debate about issues)
- Efficient in an erotic sense
I am curious to see what specific cities as well as what specific events I would most likely encounter this type of woman. I am going to guess that my best bet are libraries/coffee shops/music/art festivals/museums, etc; And the best cities would most likely be in the Northwestern united states. I am hoping there are some people with some insight that could elaborate on this topic. Thanks a lot.
married my friend. You have to snag a woman like that in High school or college.
This list looks familiar. Didn't you have this up in another thread recently? We still don't know what "efficient in an erotic sense" means. Aside from whatever that means, your list describes all the women I know. Just go outside and talk to women wherever they cross your path. In order to meet women, you have to talk to them. Did you say you're living in Florida? Try NYC, Boston, the West Coast, Colorado, art towns in northern New Mexico.
I did post this as a response to another thread but I wanted to invoke a separate discussion. I will not be living in Florida for much longer and will be relocating to Seattle in September. I am hoping I will have better luck up there because I am not pleased by the dating ambiance here at all.
I'm curious what you mean by feminine. I'm a woman, and I'd say most women I know fall into the feminine category. What specific characteristics are you talking about?
Looks feminine. Takes care of herself and appearance. Nurturing and sweet. Doesn't try to act like a man by being abrasive or aggressive. The last one is really unattractive. No man is looking to compete with his wife.
married my friend. You have to snag a woman like that in High school or college.
Not true. In college most guys who are into dating go for sexy-looking women, not the sweet, innocent types the OP is looking for. Shy guys are interested in the OP's type, but they're too shy to ask anyone out. So the kind of women the OP's looking for often go through college without dating. Being creative and adventurous, they tend to participate in study abroad programs, take a semester off to travel, volunteer with the Peace Corps after college, and are out in the world working for social change (their interest in politics put to constructive use). It sounds like the OP needs to get out and about more, and engage with the world more in order to find these women.
Looks feminine. Takes care of herself and appearance. Nurturing and sweet. Doesn't try to act like a man by being abrasive or aggressive. The last one is really unattractive. No man is looking to compete with his wife.
I really don't know very women I'd consider abrasive or aggressive.
I doubt you'd find soft spoken and an adventurer and all that other stuff. But maybe you should do volunteer work. I used to volunteer with a group that helped troubled teens learn skillsets that employers are looking for. Or you could help at a food bank. It's a good way to stand out from other men and you would be more likely to find a woman like that.
This is the score, exactly! These women are contributing to their communities and to the world. Something that the OP doesn't seem to be doing, himself. Try volunteering for Habitat For Humanity or at your local animal shelter, OP. Volunteer with your local or regional parks department to build and maintain trails. Get involved in environmental organizations, or join a canvassing group during the next Presidential or local Congressional campaigns. Take a theater improv acting class or attend local arts events. Also, try taking a couple of vacations on the West Coast.
I doubt you'd find soft spoken and an adventurer and all that other stuff. But maybe you should do volunteer work. I used to volunteer with a group that helped troubled teens learn skillsets that employers are looking for. Or you could help at a food bank. It's a good way to stand out from other men and you would be more likely to find a woman like that.
You can't create a recipe for the perfect woman and just go find her. All the things you list are fine qualities, and I'd say there are many women out there that possess those.
All the things you listed are more quick gratification qualities or surface qualities to an extent. Have you figured out what your real life goals are? Do you just want a trophy woman, or do you want a true partner to take care of you while you are sick and old?
I feel like this is the reason a lot of couples break up quickly, or divorce quickly. People think they can have everything they want in a partner, or they can change them if they try hard enough. It's simply NOT true. You need to make a list of what is really important to you in life, what is an absolute dealbreaker, and find a woman in that spectrum. You will only be initially attracted to the women who display at least 70% of what is on your list. After that, I'd say you need to learn that not every woman will EVER have every single quality you desire.
I've dated all sorts of men, and loved them for different reasons. However, I was too hung up on my "instant gratification" and not enough on my life goals.
Boyfriend #1: Attractive, charismatic, athlete, we had amazing chemistry. He cheated on me and was emotionally abusive.
Boyfriend #2: Not as attractive, but a complete sweetheart. Put me first before everything. Paid for all our meals (his insistence), treated me like a princess, wonderful family. No chemistry, but he had all my "qualities" I needed. Stayed 9 months too long.
Boyfriend #3: Exotic, athletic, model looks. Was the best at giving presents. Extremely "manly" and assertive. He was a really, really good time. He emotionally/sexually abused me and was spoiled, a liar, and abusive to his own parents.
Boyfriend #4: My current. He has issues with self confidence, but is an amazing man. He and I have the same goals in life and we have a very mutual relationship. I plan on marrying him in a few years. Plenty of qualities I dislike, but I can put those aside. Wonderful career drive, and has stuck with me and been supportive through the worst times of my life. Never puts me down. Fights fair. Cute to boot
What I'm saying is, my recipe list on my current may be less robust than my recipe list for my "ideal" man, but the ingredients my current brings to the table are 100x more potent than what anyone else I have EVER met could bring to the table.
It really bothers me that you want a woman who will never challenge you. It sounds like you want a pawn, not a partner. A partner will keep you on your toes and constantly push you to be a better man (or woman). If you feel like you want to be the "big man" of the house, you may have trouble finding yourself a woman without mental instabilities or daddy problems. A lot of modern women want an equally beneficial relationship. I need an equivalent power dynamic in my own.
[quote=lmw36;29823527]You can't create a recipe for the perfect woman and just go find her. All the things you list are fine qualities, and I'd say there are many women out there that possess those. [quote]
Bingo.
What is it about shopping lists? It is very unrealistic to expect a perfect combination as well as physical attraction. Sometimes you just have to let go of all that expectation and allow the natural flow of meeting someone and actually connecting on some far deeper level.
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