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The original story is sweet.... I'm glad they are so happy together. If I saw that couple walking down the street I'd probably assume they were not in a romantic relationship based on my preconceived notions - but that is my problem - and I would never be rude enough to say anything about it.
I don't think people try to rub you the wrong way by using "chubby chaser"
I never used that term, but I think a lot of people are just overly sensitive.
But that is just my opinion anyway. Many men call themselves "chubby chaser". It is just a term, of course if one has to be politically correct all the Freaking time, they would find that term offensive I guess. (shrug)
I call myself a chubby chaser. What's more, my wife calls me a chubby chaser. It's a simple description of guy who like a certain type of woman, in this case chubby or overweight women. The term certainly is not offensive to me or my wife who happens to be chubby herself and the recipient of this chubby chaser's affection.
I can also appreciate joe's objection to the term. As near as I can figure, the mere fact that we have such a description for men who like chubby girls seems to be indicative of something outside the norm. For example, it is perfectly normal for some guys to like blondes only. Or a certain ethnicity only. Do we have descriptive terms for these? It is perfectly normal for some of us to pursue chubby girls exclusively, so why the description here? It's a valid question, though as a chubby chaser myself I maintain the term is not offensive to me or my wife.
This is why I've never understood why some people are so judgmental about overweight men and women. We are not all on an even playing field. We all have different talents and abilities. This applies to weight loss and fitness as well.
And this is why I don't judge when I see an overweight person. I don't know that person's story. I don't know how hard their circumstances are, or how hard they're trying to improve, or if they are simply happy with themselves. It's not my place to surmise that person is lazy and full of excuses. Maybe it's true, but it's still not my place to judge. Nor is it anyone else's. I wish more people realized this.
Dating is to some extent judging. It's one thing to dislike or disparage a person for his/her weight in regular life, say for example a colleague at work. There indeed we have no business to judge. But in the context of dating and attraction, judging occurs all of the time. Hopefully a partner's weight is not the primary criterion for whether the relationship evolves further, but it is a criterion after all.
Also, I find it to be important to draw distinction between a person struggling with some flaw, vs. triumphantly celebrating it and expecting others to indulge in the person's fancies. I have bad teeth. I didn't brush when I was a kid or teenager. Lots of cavities, root canals and extractions. Having recognized this, I take steps to improve my dental health... dentures, braces and eventually implants. While I don't wish to be condemned for my poor teeth, I recognize that it's a flaw and I take responsibility for the poor choices that led to my present predicament. It's true that my teeth grew crooked and were difficult to keep clean. They always looked bad, so I wasn't motivated to take care of them. It's not "entirely" my fault, but ultimately, well, it is.
Now compare that to a young person, say in her/his 20s, who is 100 pounds overweight. I don't mean a few pounds here and there, or a woman gaining weight after childbirth, or the natural weight-gain of middle age. Should we condemn said young person for being obese? No. But what if this person says: "Damn it, I eat whatever I like, and exercise is pointless. My beauty is the beauty of rotund corpulence. If you fail to understand that, you're shallow and baselessly judgmental."
What if I said, "Straight teeth are for effete runway models. Real men show gaping holes when they smile. My missing teeth are beautiful. They're a testament to me not bothering with stupid fripperies like brushing teeth. If you don't understand that, you're shallow and baselessly judgmental".
Well, the vituperative self-promotion of bad teeth is pretty stupid, isn't it? Why not the same about obesity?
Last edited by ohio_peasant; 06-20-2013 at 10:25 AM..
I call myself a chubby chaser. What's more, my wife calls me a chubby chaser. It's a simple description of guy who like a certain type of woman, in this case chubby or overweight women. The term certainly is not offensive to me or my wife who happens to be chubby herself and the recipient of this chubby chaser's affection.
I can also appreciate joe's objection to the term. As near as I can figure, the mere fact that we have such a description for men who like chubby girls seems to be indicative of something outside the norm. For example, it is perfectly normal for some guys to like blondes only. Or a certain ethnicity only. Do we have descriptive terms for these? It is perfectly normal for some of us to pursue chubby girls exclusively, so why the description here? It's a valid question, though as a chubby chaser myself I maintain the term is not offensive to me or my wife.
yes, I agree with you.
My brothers and I are mixed Asian/white/Hawaiian.
My older brother Leon dated and liked many women. LOL But he was /is a darn good man who NEVER cheated. He is one woman kind of man. His wife is a blond girl who is 5'11". (My bro is 6'2") =) To me, my sister in law looks like a chopstick, she is very tall, skinny, has no curves. But hey, my brother loves her and so do I. She doesn't mind people calling her skinny, but we do have to compliment her because she used to be a fashion runway model.
My other older brother Kyle also dated many many women LOL, but he has a thing for black girls. His ideal woman is Venessa Williams (NOT beyonce) lol My brother has been called "N lover" and got into many fights because of this. His best friend has called him a "chubby chaser" and my bro had to explain to him that "I am not into fat girls, I like lean black ladies."
by the way, I think your wife is beautiful. You two make a great good looking couple.
Well, the vituperative self-promotion of bad teeth is pretty stupid, isn't it? Why not the same about obesity?
I'm not sayin obesity is somethin to celebrate. I'm saying it ISN'T something to judge. You make the dental health comparison, so I'll run with it. The basics include brushing and flossing daily, regular exams, preventive maintenance, etc. But even if someone does all that, we are all a little different. Some of us are NATURALLY more resistant to cavities, gum disease, etc. Why is it so hard to understand weight maintenance is not as easy for some as it is for others. Why is it so hard to understand attraction to an overweight woman is perfectly normal. If something is perfectly normal, there really is no reason to celebrate it or decry it. But as a fairly athletic guy who likes overweight women, I can attest firsthand that people think I have a fetish. I don't have a fetish, I have a wife. She happens to have a big butt and some extra pounds on her belly. I like it that way. She is gorgeous. Nothin abnormal about liking a gorgeous woman, right?
. She happens to have a big butt and some extra pounds on her belly. I like it that way. She is gorgeous. Nothin abnormal about liking a gorgeous woman, right?
There is nothing gorgeous about fat deposits derived from laziness and poor eating habits.
I've said it numerous times, fitness and weight loss comes easier for some than others. If you had to follow my wife's gym routine for a week you probably wouldn't be calling her lazy. If you had to take the level of effort relative to her and normalize to yourself, I doubt you'd be able to keep up.
Nor is there any redeeming value in opinions spouted off from a standpoint of ignorance. I've said it numerous times, fitness and weight loss comes easier for some than others. If you had to follow my wife's gym routine for a week you probably wouldn't be calling her lazy. If you had to take the level of effort relative to her and normalize to yourself, I doubt you'd be able to keep up.
For the record, any exercise routine in the world can be out eaten. 6 packs are made in the kitchen.
Orphaned. I've said it numerous times, fitness and weight loss comes easier for some than others. If you had to follow my wife's gym routine for a week you probably wouldn't be calling her lazy. If you had to take the level of effort relative to her and normalize to yourself, I doubt you'd be able to keep up.
That's true too. Remember the old quote: "Beauty is skin-deep...but ugly goes to the bone." Yeah, it's meant as an insult but I've always seen as: what's deep inside can be pretty fuggin' ugly indeed.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 06-21-2013 at 08:45 AM..
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You two make a great good looking couple.