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The younger guys that I "date" totally dig this "older chick", they admit an attraction for the "cougar type". I love the short refractory periods of the younger men and try to wear them out.
GoCubs: You just made a great point. Men have a generalized sex drive. Many are not all that selective, they just want it. Women are very selective, indicating that their sex drive is not just pure sex drive, but is situational, depending on how attractive the man is. So there are all kinds of other things going on, not just pure sex drive. Maybe they just wanted a trophy. For example, my wife's sex drive has always been situational. It takes something to really get her in the mood, like a movie, vacation setting or like when she wanted to get pregnant. IE it wasn't pure sex drive, there were other things going on. People are very complicated and behavior is not just contingent on one factor.
Agree, women tend to be more selective.... But maybe it's more selective on how they act upon their sex drive? Maybe the strong pure sex drive is still there, but they may repress it more then men, for various reasons... Agree that it can be very complicated and everyone is different. For me, I pretty much want my hubby regardless of context/situation.... Any day, time, place is good for me - I'm pretty much always in the mood for him, and he knows it and takes full advantage of that...LOL
What's interesting is I think many women, if they've only had sex with men and don't talk openly about sex with their woman friends, don't realize how much women vary from person to person with sexual response. They know they get off a certainly way, and they know the guys they've been with have mostly gotten off similarly to each other, so it's natural for them to assume that women must get off similarly to each other, too. Not the case!
The way I once heard Dr. Drew put it is, "The male sexual response is like a light switch. The female sexual response is like the flight deck of a 747," to which he added, "If 747s were all different from each other."
The quote by Dr. Drew is priceless.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoCUBS1
Just because a woman may be more careful (due to physical risk, disease, pregnancy, social pressure, etc.) on who they sleep with and when they do it - it does not mean they have less of a sex drive....
QFT.
One may have an impulse/urge, but inhibit/override that physical response with other factors
(emotional, other sensory variables, hormonal fluctuations, etc.) which influence decisions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LexusNexus
Common sense says that sex drives are as varied as food preferences. Some women have a high sex drive, some don't. Some have no sex drive.
The comparison to food preferences is apt,
in that one may be have a drive to consume food, but not just any old food will be palatable-
that doesn't necessarily prove there is less hunger, just because someone is choosy/selective about what he/she eats.
Sexuality is a spectrum/gradient, as are many of our actions/behaviors-most of use exist between the extreme polarities.
While experience may come with age. I also believe that sex has changed a lot over the last 10-20 years.
Many younger girls nowadays look at anal sex and blow jobs like something that's completely normal for most sexual experiences. Many older women I have been with are like "whoa no way" or like a "whoa that was a first time in like 20 years."
I would imagine the same goes with older guys and younger guys as well. Definitely notice that in the older men I talk to. I do have some guy friends in their 40's that can go like 4-5 times a day like a lot of younger guys. So it definitely depends on the guys.
Yeah, I think (honest, fully consenting) polyamory is the answer to a lot of these sex drive issues.
Sounds good on paper but haven't met a woman yet that was interested in having a real relationship with two men. Though, 1/2 of the women Ive dated over the last 5 years were open to an occasional woman. Ive only recently come to terms with that.
Last year, I brought my 23 year old cousin to the local bar to watch a game. He is a NYC model (heterosexual) and had a local commercial. For reference, he looks just like Leonardo DiCapprio, but better looking face, with a better body.... Well, all these 40 y.o. married women/moms/professionals from my town were all over him - It WAS extremely creepy. One mom even asked me if I was ever with him - wtf - he's my cousin, weirdo.... I was creeped out by all the women leering at him. Some of these women still ask about him... These "normal" women indeed "lost their mind" around him - they were so worked up...
See it before to, Apparently, some men and some women Exude attractiveness and desireability to the point of creating mass hysteria in other people. I have a cousin that has this power too, and he does not look like a movie star. He's my Cuz, but I hate him for his powers
While experience may come with age. I also believe that sex has changed a lot over the last 10-20 years.
Many younger girls nowadays look at anal sex and blow jobs like something that's completely normal for most sexual experiences. Many older women I have been with are like "whoa no way" or like a "whoa that was a first time in like 20 years."
I would imagine the same goes with older guys and younger guys as well. Definitely notice that in the older men I talk to. I do have some guy friends in their 40's that can go like 4-5 times a day like a lot of younger guys. So it definitely depends on the guys.
Yes. And I believe that more women are opening up to their sexuality because they can, and not be labeled as much as several decades ago. I have several close female friends in their late 30's that are just starting to let themselves really let loose, at my encouragement and coaching, lol.
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