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Old 06-28-2013, 01:25 PM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
3,795 posts, read 3,698,022 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
Many high-sex, low-promiscuity people, at least the ones I know, are involved in the polyamory community
The people I've known in that community are some of the most promiscuous people I've known. They were basically people who wanted all the benefits of being married with all the sleeping-around benefits of being single. I'm not knocking it...I'd love to have that, too! (Especially if I had been married in my 20's or 30's.) It seemed to work for very few in the long term, though. Jealousy eventually became an issue with most.
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Old 06-28-2013, 01:26 PM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
31,479 posts, read 18,451,347 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post

But seriously folks, if someone you are dating is concerned and educated about this stuff, do you consider it a red flag for a sexually repressed future?
To be completely honest, this has never been my issue. I don't do one night stand and I have always been in monogamous relationships. I don't judge anybody, I just truly don't care about other people's sex life.

My sex education came from OB/GYN and my annual physical examination. The knowledge I got is good enough for me to prevent STD or unexpected pregnancy. I don't have a particular curiosity towards human sexuality, so my knowledge about sex is very limited.

To answer your question, if somebody I am dating is concerned and educated about this stuff, I DO NOT consider it a red flag for a sexually repressed future.
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Old 06-28-2013, 01:30 PM
 
Location: Toronto
2,161 posts, read 2,254,389 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TaoistDude View Post
Many people can't afford frequent testing even if it's indicated based on their behavior.
Isn't testing free in the US? Even if you aren't eligible for healthcare as a newcomer in this province, any sex clinic will give you free testing.
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Old 06-28-2013, 01:30 PM
 
1,255 posts, read 1,238,952 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
And does learning about and applying basic prevention indicate that someone has a high sex drive or a low one?

I was surprised by someone assuming the latter in a couple other threads yesterday.

I always thought the whole point of safe-sex education and STI testing (like the point of feminism and birth control) was more and better sex for everyone. Have I got this stuff backwards?

If I prefer to have sex every day multiple times, but I used condoms for the first 6 months and quizzed my bf about his testing and history before we ever did anything... does that mean I have a low sex drive and I hate sex? Cause if so, I'd better break the news.

But seriously folks, if someone you are dating is concerned and educated about this stuff, do you consider it a red flag for a sexually repressed future?
I think the answer to this thread is quite simple by checking the general attitude of two types of people. First people are strictly into delayed sex and monogamy, second group is very much the opposite.
It doesn't mean anything on default but it means that first group is so-called "sex conservative" and second is "sex liberal" by general audience. It generally follows the similar reasoning difference on many other issues regarding sex as well, or at least there is a very strong correlation with certain attitudes.
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Old 06-28-2013, 02:01 PM
 
Location: USA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monemi View Post
Isn't testing free in the US? Even if you aren't eligible for healthcare as a newcomer in this province, any sex clinic will give you free testing.
I paid myself, but I have heard there are free clinics. I wouldn't want to go through the bureaucracy of a government run free clinic. The mens health place I used is extermel clean, professional and fast. I remember taking my girlfirend down for a preganacy test when I was young. The waiting line was terrible.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
Sometimes I wish I could be a man for a day, so I could see what it is like. But I guess what y'all are saying is that it would have to be for decades, to really get the idea.

I can't imagine having a sex drive that changes like that. But I know all my guy friends say the same thing you all do. Mine has been pretty much the same since puberty -- a bit higher than my male partners, even in my teens..
"Mine has been pretty much the same since puberty"
Even though I have dated a few women that match your experience, most women I have been in realtionships with have had a much greater appetite and much improved experiences past the 30 years old mark. Your one of the luckier ones

Last edited by LS Jaun; 06-28-2013 at 02:11 PM..
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Old 06-28-2013, 03:03 PM
 
1,235 posts, read 1,125,631 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Neither. It strongly implies you are not an idiot.

I concur. In my PERFECT world, STD/AIDS test MUST be mandatory before anyone engage in sexual relations ESPECIALLY ONS.

In fact I wish everyone thinks like me and the OP - make sure the other person is disease free.

The AIDS epidemic in 80s MUST be mandatory video to watch in HS sex education. I think it's BEST option rather than passing condoms, SERIOUSLY.
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Old 06-28-2013, 04:11 PM
 
6,758 posts, read 7,908,723 times
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Quote:
Isn't testing free in the US? Even if you aren't eligible for healthcare as a newcomer in this province, any sex clinic will give you free testing.
In the US, health care is considered a privilege, not a right. One hopes that may change.

Quote:
I paid myself, but I have heard there are free clinics. I wouldn't want to go through the bureaucracy of a government run free clinic. The mens health place I used is extermel clean, professional and fast. I remember taking my girlfirend down for a preganacy test when I was young. The waiting line was terrible.
The women's clinic near me is extremely clean, professional and I have never seen a line linger than one minute there. They provide free testing for everything except HIV, and there is free HIV testing at a couple other places in town. Their funding is via private donations, IIUC. I think the HIV place also has some government grants and is run by volunteers from the community.

I have never encountered a free, government clinic in the US? Do they exist?

I have been to the Public Health office for immunizations, though, and it was rather humorous (to my mind, anyway). Their very nice, professional, knowledgeable staff work in this 70s era building that, although very clean, looks like it has not been painted since it was built... and the parole office is down the hall.

They are still not free, but a good price if you need a tetanus shot. and I think they do free HIV testing.
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Old 06-28-2013, 04:15 PM
 
6,758 posts, read 7,908,723 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth View Post
The people I've known in that community are some of the most promiscuous people I've known. They were basically people who wanted all the benefits of being married with all the sleeping-around benefits of being single. I'm not knocking it...I'd love to have that, too! (Especially if I had been married in my 20's or 30's.) It seemed to work for very few in the long term, though. Jealousy eventually became an issue with most.
Gosh, we must be talking about different communities! I am talking about the one where people typically have two multi-decade relationships and take 6 months to have sex with a new partner . And jealousy is looked at sort of like alcoholism is in the mainstream -- a mental health problem that any responsible person should be working hard to cure.

I HAVE run into 20-somethings who use 'polyamory' as a fancy term for 'everything that moves', but have not known them to be involved in organised support groups and potlucks and stuff.

(I comment on the 6 month wait because I, personally, found it frustrating.)
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Old 06-28-2013, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
3,795 posts, read 3,698,022 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones View Post
In the US, health care is considered a privilege, not a right.
That being said, most places do have county health clinics where you can get tested for free. They're just a giant pain the arse.
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Old 06-28-2013, 04:23 PM
 
Location: Toronto
2,161 posts, read 2,254,389 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth View Post
That being said, most places do have county health clinics where you can get tested for free. They're just a giant pain the arse.
So then, no one has an excuse in the US to not get tested who needs testing?
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