Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The only danger sign for me was single mothers who were looking for a father for their children more than they were looking for a romantic relationship. The single mother i married had no such wishes, thankfully.
good post,,,when you get pulled into situations, unplanned,,its very different with kids..
most like kids, and it was wrong for that father to put you on the spot,,and even the kids ,,to do so,,
thats one of my pet peeves too..if the kids are animals...
the deeper you fo into the relationship, the deeper YOU are in a position to be leaned on,,,and the fine lines,, are so inconsiderate,,because while you can bring alot to the relationship, and actually help the kids out alot,,, why should this be your burden,,when the single parent is so disrespectful..
the flipside of this--- half the marriages and in divorce, both single parents and kids,,and shell-shocked.
parents... tend to shower the kids with gifts, and back off discipline,,because they feel guilty for the divorce-wasnt the kids fault,,,
and this isnt good for the kids,,
anyways..ive always had a soft spot for kids,,
and ive met many single mothers... many great woman trying to balance it all out while sacrificing themselves,,,,with a focus on the kids,,id much rather date a waitress that has kids, that is a very good mother, than an exec. that is selfish, self-centered
i had a dating rule,,,didnt introduce/meet kids for at least 3-6 months,,
and the "lines" were well established at first-
women/mothers for the most part, are the natural nesters, single mothers have a huge burden of responsibility of raising kids...while sacrificing themselves..and with little appreciation anywheres
many single fathers dont have the kids full time,,and have more time/flexibility- much easier to date because he doesnt have the demands,,the single mother has
when meeting a single parent..listen closely to what they say-if one spouse is blaming the rest of the world on the x , and is dumping all over him/her, this is a red flag..
when my kid was younger andi was dating,,i was honest,,,said my x was a very good mother,,never an ill word...and this is what the single moms picked up on,
dating a single parent isnt easy, you can go 0 to crazy in a month,, a single mother has to be much more responsible, and mature,,than if she didnt have kids,,,actually, you can tell alot about someone, much more,,if they are a single parent,,than if they are not-not the fact they have kids or a failed relationship,,its how they conduct themselves in trying times..
I have to say single fathers have the hardest time dating.
From personal experience, most of the women I had interest in didn't like the fact I have a child. I don't know what it was but they didn't seem interested. I sometimes lied, told them I was just single and childless. I eventually told them I lied, that I have a daughter, and in which they turned around and simply walked away.
That was a long time ago, though. I felt guilty lying to these women and trying to hide my daughter, just to get into a women's pants.
Now, I just don't bother with dating. Unless someone does come my way, but it'll be my daughter before anyone.
That's how I am with my son, he comes first. Many can't handle not being #1.
How about the single parents date each other? Surely they would be more understanding of the other's situation.
I'm sure many of them do. But just because there is a single father and a single mother both looking for a partner does not mean the chemistry will be automatic simply because they understand each other's situation. All the same rules of preference, attraction, and chemistry still apply. They can't (or shouldn't) force it simply because both are single parents. That would likely be a disaster for the kids involved.
I'm sure many of them do. But just because there is a single father and a single mother both looking for a partner does not mean the chemistry will be automatic simply because they understand each other's situation. All the same rules of preference, attraction, and chemistry still apply. They can't (or shouldn't) force it simply because both are single parents. That would likely be a disaster for the kids involved.
I think it's hard for both men and women. I'm a single dad, and even though I'm in my early 40s, and in my prime in terms of looks, physical fitness, and career success, I have found it really hard to find a woman who wants to date me and who isn't threatened by my devotion to my son.
I think it's hard for both men and women. I'm a single dad, and even though I'm in my early 40s, and in my prime in terms of looks, physical fitness, and career success, I have found it really hard to find a woman who wants to date me and who isn't threatened by my devotion to my son.
The only danger sign for me was single mothers who were looking for a father for their children more than they were looking for a romantic relationship. The single mother i married had no such wishes, thankfully.
That's my sister in law's case as well, she was not looking for a father for her children at all, she was looking for love. My sister in law was a super tall blonde fashion model/ designer. She is even several years older than my brother. She had two children from her first marriage and bringing children to the family is a HUGE adjustment for my brother and my entire family.
At the very beginning, it was so awkward. My parents even asked my brother, "Are you sure this is what you are looking for? Raising one's own child is hard enough, but raising two of other people's children? You need to think about it."
Well, next thing we know, my brother told us he was getting married. I spent 2 nights crying my eyes out because I was so convinced my brother was doomed. I didn't like those two kids at the very beginning..
Turned out, my sister in law is the best choice for my brother. When he went through a serious sudden surgery, she was in the hospital taking care of him. She has made many sacrifices throughout the years and I can honestly say she put my brother's needs in front of her own. My brother is very successful and she never asked him to buy her or her children any gifts. But then again, my brother is paying for everything, including her children's private school expenses. (their own bio father is pretty much a deadbeat. )
When my nephew was born, the first moment I held him in my arms, I knew my brother made a right choice marrying this woman. I love her for giving me such a beautiful nephew, I also thank her everyday for loving my brother.
I told her once that I understand she would put her children's needs first, but if she decided to treat my brother like a doormat, I'd kick her a@@. She told me she married my brother because she loved him, she was looking for a husband, not a substitute father for her children. Gee, what a relief!!
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 07-07-2013 at 07:38 AM..
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I didn't like those two kids at the very beginning.. 
)
