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Look, you two have no clue what real love looks like.
Secondly, you both lack emotional maturity.
So spend time on your own now, don't date right now - you are not ready for a relationship.
Use that time wisely, maybe even with a therapist to make the most of it, for serious introspection.
Making sure you "don't make the same mistakes in the future" will only happen once you spend the time to understand the choices you've made so far and who you really want to be.
Best of luck.
Yes.
You have several serious issues that you seem to think are normal.
- you f*ck women you do not admire and respect (how to you think your 'rebound' gf would feel if she read the things you have written about her here?)
- you believe that there is something wrong with sex -- at least for women
- you cling to your double standards with no apparent awareness that they are irrational
- you use sex with another woman as a weapon, for 'revenge'
- you invade your gf's privacy and seem to feel no remorse for doing so
- you are unable to comprehend why 3.5 years with no commitment is a red flag
Get therapy. You will stop hating yourself and others, and your relationships will work out much better.
but the average number of sexual partners is around 7 isnt it?
Maybe in 1972. Most people I know had that many in college alone--and I went to college in the 80s. I would imagine average numbers are much higher now, although many women will not admit it because of crap like the nonsense spewed in the OP. The more men shame women about sex, the less women will be honest with them and/or the more women will tell them to buzz off with their misogyny. Count on it.
You have several serious issues that you seem to think are normal.
- you f*ck women you do not admire and respect (how to you think your 'rebound' gf would feel if she read the things you have written about her here?)
- you believe that there is something wrong with sex -- at least for women
- you cling to your double standards with no apparent awareness that they are irrational
- you use sex with another woman as a weapon, for 'revenge'
- you invade your gf's privacy and seem to feel no remorse for doing so
- you are unable to comprehend why 3.5 years with no commitment is a red flag
Get therapy. You will stop hating yourself and others, and your relationships will work out much better.
Something tells me OP is the same guy who came on here a couple of months ago talking about how he was angry that while he and his GF were on a break, she slept with a semi-famous DJ. Come to think of it, that guy was probably the same guy who came on here a few months before that talking about how he found out at a reunion that his GF slept with some fraternity guys 10 years ago.
All three of them sound the same. Same anger, same hatred of women, same double-standard.
Thanks for feedback. This is not a fake thread. She didn't choose to stay employed as a cocktail server. The job market in LA for PR is very challenging. @johna151 aren't forums a medium to get advice on actual life situations? This was my longest relationship and it was great until the final 6 months. I did want to marry her but saw changes/dislikes that I wanted corrected. Instead gf becomes moody, uneasy about the fact that we weren't engaged while seeing our friends get married(actually attended 3 of my friends weddings). Yes, I was immature in certain aspects of the relationship and yes I need to move on. Requested feedback to see what other guys/women think and ensure I dont make same mistakes in the future.
Honestly? I think that you should have forgiven her...granted, she made a mistake, but it seems like she tried very hard to make up for it to you, based on your earlier posts in the thread...
OP, I can see why her recreational activities bothered you. But in reality...."We were on a Breaaaaak!" ~ Ross
sorry I couldn't resist.
I think both of you are in the wrong. I really think going through her phone was totally wrong. AND letting her pay for a trip for you. Yes, she's been devious but you have too, gotta admit that right?
Cut your losses, move on (sounds like you've already decided to). Learn from her mistakes and your mistakes, realize you're just as much to blame. Learn what you don't want to repeat in your next relationship.
Good luck to you, and I hope your next relationship is smoother.
You had a fling and she had a fling. So far, so good.
Re: the threesome -- are you really going to tell me that if, during the time you were separated, two hot women came up to you in a bar and asked you to have a threesome with them, you would have refused?
I don't see how she is more of a **** than you are. Looks to me like you are not good enough for her.
This thread reminds me more of the movie "Clerks" than it does "Friends."
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I think that you should have forgiven her...granted, she made a mistake, but it seems like she tried very hard to make up for it to you, based on your earlier posts in the thread...
