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Old 08-14-2013, 09:28 AM
 
2,350 posts, read 3,909,912 times
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If you didn't have any, how "good" would the marriage really be?

For example what happens if you aren't friends OR you don't have sufficient "benefits" OR you have practical (financial, home economic, "working together", home logistical, life practices, etc) incompatibilities?

What happens to the "love" if those above aren't strong?
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:33 AM
 
12,308 posts, read 14,621,961 times
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Then its not even a marriage of convenience or functional and that's the bare minimum needed.

Some people are missing these things but stay together for appearances (I.e so the kids and everyone else won't be hurt or to avoid the public embarrassment of divorce). Sometimes one wants to divorce but doesn't want to hurt their spouse so they stay (actually I read this was the #1 reason people don't leave). I wouldn't call that love though.

Last edited by srjth; 08-14-2013 at 09:44 AM..
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Newcomer to the Cleveland area
1,411 posts, read 1,313,973 times
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I don't try to break it down like that. We have a business aspect to our relationship (as managing household finances), we ARE best friends, and lovers too.
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:37 AM
 
Location: Pa
42,183 posts, read 39,150,176 times
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You are a team.
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:39 AM
 
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Its all intertwined... well except the business stuff which just is. But the love, sex, intimacy, friendship, trust all grow together.
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:39 AM
 
Location: Emerald Coast, FL
5,025 posts, read 7,234,695 times
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No. A FWB normally has a significant flaw (incompatibility) that precludes a long-term romantic relationship. A business relationship is independent - and it can exist with a spouse, a FWB, or just someone with a skill you need.

A good marriage will mean different things to different people, but to me it means a loving relationship with someone who is highly compatible in all or most ways (and not incompatible in any), including sexually, where both parties actively support the health and happiness of their partner.
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Old 08-14-2013, 12:27 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,199 posts, read 18,494,067 times
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I don't think I would ever think of my marriage in terms of business or FWB. But that's just me.
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Old 08-14-2013, 12:33 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,264 posts, read 81,794,788 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
I don't think I would ever think of my marriage in terms of business or FWB. But that's just me.
It's NOT just you

Sad how many here really are clueless about what a good marriage looks like.
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Old 08-14-2013, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Whereever we have our RV parked
7,698 posts, read 6,211,393 times
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In a good marriage its about "We." Its about our health and well being, our enjoyment of sex, our finances. If my wife is ill, it should be a serious concern of mine also. Maybe she needs to see a doctor, so I make sure she goes or I take her if necessary. Its not her house, we mutually agree on decor, location, size etc.
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Old 08-14-2013, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Newcomer to the Cleveland area
1,411 posts, read 1,313,973 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by augiedogie View Post
In a good marriage its about "We." Its about our health and well being, our enjoyment of sex, our finances. If my wife is ill, it should be a serious concern of mine also. Maybe she needs to see a doctor, so I make sure she goes or I take her if necessary. Its not her house, we mutually agree on decor, location, size etc.

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