Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Well, if you think about it the most desirable mates are picked up and married off fairly early, which oftentimes means families are started. Since many marriages end in divorce, I suppose that would mean the most desirable people would probably have children. There are exceptions of course, especially considering the more educated you are the more likely you are to put off having children...but then again, women aren't judged on education and are judged on mostly looks so oftentimes the most attractive women do have children rather early.
I know quite a few single, childless women in their late 20s-mid 30s...but they're not the most attractive or the most desirable women. They generally do have issues dating or staying in relationships and their childless status doesn't seem to matter much.
I may not be able to have children physically, and add to that the ethics involved with passing on my genetic disorder but that hasn't helped me in dating at all.
In addition, I've found that many men feel they are childless even if they DO have children because they're simply not involved in their lives. Or my favorite, when random hookups turn up with a 5 year old kid and paternity tests show it's the guys. This has happened to at least 4 of my guy friends and their girlfriends (and wife in one instance) were none too happy about it. At least with women you know they have kids instead of having it as a happy little surprise down the road.
Alright, some clarification is necessary here. If the OP's concern is finding a woman who has not yet had children, such that the newly-formed happy couple could start their own family from scratch, then indeed it would be necessary to search in a younger age-bracket.
But being "child-free" is a philosophical position, often first espoused in one's teens, and maintained for life. This is why I say that a person who is child-free at 20 will remain that way at 50. Those who are uninterested in parenthood at 20, who later change their minds, had operative and personal reasons for not becoming parents. And those might have been very good reasons. But they are not philosophical reasons, or at least no zealously philosophical reasons.
As for "how I know"... I married a woman who was uninterested in having children from viewpoint of personal convenience. The stresses of motherhood worried her. In her late 30s, she changed her mind, and thus ended our marriage. So I emphasize again the importance of being child-free on such grounds as antinatalism, rather than personal convenience.
Again, this isn't the OP's concern. His concern, evidently, is not finding himself as stepfather to someone else's children.
The first definition is my concern, however, others are concerned about the second.
Well, if you think about it the most desirable mates are picked up and married off fairly early, which oftentimes means families are started. Since many marriages end in divorce, I suppose that would mean the most desirable people would probably have children. There are exceptions of course, especially considering the more educated you are the more likely you are to put off having children...but then again, women aren't judged on education and are judged on mostly looks so oftentimes the most attractive women do have children rather early.
I know quite a few single, childless women in their late 20s-mid 30s...but they're not the most attractive or the most desirable women. They generally do have issues dating or staying in relationships and their childless status doesn't seem to matter much.
Damn, what do you do if you are caught in circumstances that would make it unlikely for a relationship to last, such as moving around a lot in the 20's and maybe early 30's? What if you are both educated, and seeking an educated partner, and you want a large family?
Am I in a poor position to want it all, the education, career, and family?
Damn, what do you do if you are caught in circumstances that would make it unlikely for a relationship to last, such as moving around a lot in the 20's and maybe early 30's? What if you are both educated, and seeking an educated partner, and you want a large family?
Am I in a poor position to want it all, the education, career, and family?
You'll have to be super desirable and fine someone who is also super desirable who hasn't paired off yet.
Honestly...good luck with that. It can happen...but it's not going to be easy or even likely to happen.
I know quite a few single, childless women in their late 20s-mid 30s...but they're not the most attractive or the most desirable women. They generally do have issues dating or staying in relationships and their childless status doesn't seem to matter much.
This got me to thinking. Of course a woman's childless status wouldn't make any difference at all in dating, because no one would know they're childless, just by looking at them. It's not as if they're wearing a badge that advertises they're childless. There are lots of women who are child-free in their 20's, 30's and 40's, but if they're more average in looks, they don't get approached. A guy who's looking for childless women who also have integrity, intelligence and a caring nature would have to cast a pretty wide net to find them. There are plenty out there, but many are getting overlooked.
Damn, what do you do if you are caught in circumstances that would make it unlikely for a relationship to last, such as moving around a lot in the 20's and maybe early 30's? What if you are both educated, and seeking an educated partner, and you want a large family?
Am I in a poor position to want it all, the education, career, and family?
Not at all. By the time you get settled into a career, you'll still have 10 years, maybe more, to find someone. (And you may find that someone in grad school.) And as long as you're not picky about looks, you should have plenty of options. The challenge, as always, is to find the women who have the qualities you want, and prioritizing the qualities you want. It takes time and effort to find a good match. And a little luck.
This got me to thinking. Of course a woman's childless status wouldn't make any difference at all in dating, because no one would know they're childless, just by looking at them. It's not as if they're wearing a badge that advertises they're childless. There are lots of women who are child-free in their 20's, 30's and 40's, but if they're more average in looks, they don't get approached. A guy who's looking for childless women who also have integrity, intelligence and a caring nature would have to cast a pretty wide net to find them. There are plenty out there, but many are getting overlooked.
Yep. Funny enough, I was checking facebook a little bit ago and a 'friend' that I used to work with just updated her status to show she's 'In a Relationship'. She literally broke up with her last boyfriend less than 3 weeks ago, and has 2 children under the age of 4 with two different guys. She obviously has zero issues finding men who want to date her. On the other hand, here I am, single for nearly 4 years. Obviously the 'single Mom' stigma isn't as big of a deal in the real world as it is on CD.
Yep. Funny enough, I was checking facebook a little bit ago and a 'friend' that I used to work with just updated her status to show she's 'In a Relationship'. She literally broke up with her last boyfriend less than 3 weeks ago, and has 2 children under the age of 4 with two different guys. She obviously has zero issues finding men who want to date her. On the other hand, here I am, single for nearly 4 years. Obviously the 'single Mom' stigma isn't as big of a deal in the real world as it is on CD.
Well, think of it as this way:
The woman is either of these:
Puts out
Isn't cautious about men taking advantage
Hot
I was going to say something like that, but then realized we can't assume that the kids weren't planned. Maybe in both cases she thought the LTR was on the marriage track. Or maybe she's divorced. We don't know.
This got me to thinking of the reverse and how society thinks a woman with multiple baby daddies is easy, trashy, etc but if it's a guy it's often not the case. I personally think the same of both in that I would question why someone has multiple people they had kids with because to me in most cases shows irresponsibility.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
