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Old 09-05-2013, 06:07 AM
 
215 posts, read 296,737 times
Reputation: 229

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I wonder though why this is such a serious issue for the OP on online dating sites, when women write in their profiles they look younger than their age when they are over 40.

With online dating, women will lie about their age and weight. Men will lie about their height and income.

The OP wrote that he is 5'8" and some what self conscious about that. Most men will claim they are at least 5'9" and when you meet them, you can tell they are not.

And also, women are pressured more to maintain a youthful appearance. It really can be depressing for a woman over 40 to look around and see what her male peers look like. Many men that age are bald, overweight with large guts, and they don't even try to look better.

I think it's easier if a woman maintains her weight and takes care of her health and colors her hair to have a youthful appearance.

If the OP is turned off by women who seem vain online by commenting that they look younger than their age, then just filter those profiles out. It's obviously a turn off for him.
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Old 09-05-2013, 02:09 PM
 
361 posts, read 723,318 times
Reputation: 380
Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyCrane View Post
If you read online dating profiles, you'll often see people say they look younger than their age. And I'm sure a lot of those people truly believe it. But the more I read it, the more it comes across as insecurity. Don't apologize for your age. Don't add a qualifier to it. I'm 45, but look younger. Really? According to who. Your friends who might just be saying that to be nice? Your family who don't want you to feel old? The waiter who just wants a big tip?
I don't understand how someone can say they look younger when they profile picture says otherwise...but again, I don't do online dating so I don't know how it works.

I don't need to add a qualifier to my age as I already know I look younger when I look at myself in the mirror. I got it from my mom. Whenever people see my parents together they think my mom (who just turned 60) is actually my dad's daughter but both my parents are just 5 years apart.

I get hit on by high school kids quite a lot. That's why I have to dress a certain way -especially when going for interviews. I certainly can't wear flats. Also, last time I was going to a festival with friends and you had to be at least 18; I got asked for ID but my friends didn't!
I'm going to turn 26 in a few days and this can be very frustrating!
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Old 09-05-2013, 02:16 PM
 
896 posts, read 1,175,048 times
Reputation: 1283
Quote:
Originally Posted by curly_Q View Post
I wonder though why this is such a serious issue for the OP on online dating sites, when women write in their profiles they look younger than their age when they are over 40.

With online dating, women will lie about their age and weight. Men will lie about their height and income.

The OP wrote that he is 5'8" and some what self conscious about that. Most men will claim they are at least 5'9" and when you meet them, you can tell they are not.

And also, women are pressured more to maintain a youthful appearance. It really can be depressing for a woman over 40 to look around and see what her male peers look like. Many men that age are bald, overweight with large guts, and they don't even try to look better.

I think it's easier if a woman maintains her weight and takes care of her health and colors her hair to have a youthful appearance.

If the OP is turned off by women who seem vain online by commenting that they look younger than their age, then just filter those profiles out. It's obviously a turn off for him.
I find that men lie about their age just as much as women, possibly more often, especially over the age of 40.
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Old 09-05-2013, 02:17 PM
 
Location: My House
34,937 posts, read 36,163,891 times
Reputation: 26547
I don't do online dating and never have.

That said, I think that the safest thing is not to mention how old you may or may not look. Just post a good picture and let people decide for themselves.
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Old 09-06-2013, 09:39 AM
 
8,518 posts, read 15,616,747 times
Reputation: 7711
Quote:
Originally Posted by AZDesertBrat View Post
So, anyway, people often DO look a lot younger than they are and there's really no denying that. You just don't like the idea that they might be kinda proud of that and say so! lol
Being proud of something doesn't mean you have to tell everyone. You might be proud of your degree or your income, but do you feel the need to tell people that you're highly educated or a high earner? Of course not. Modesty is an admirable trait. But we live in a world where, increasingly, everyone wants to brag. That's fine if you're writing your résumé or selling a product. But when it comes to relationships, it reeks of insecurity.
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Old 09-06-2013, 01:40 PM
 
4,078 posts, read 5,400,248 times
Reputation: 4958
For me personally, when someone REALLY does look much younger than their age, rarely do they notice.

In fact, they're harder about their looks than anyone and wouldn't even say "I look younger than my age, as I've been told countless times." Kinda vain.

Even if people compliment someone for being younger than their age, it's like so what.

People say crap all the time to make others feel good.

Now, if you secretly want to look younger? Keep yourself staying young. You won't even have to think about whether or not you look your age, because let what shines inside out and take care of yourself so you don't have to go around touting how much younger you look. (You, not directed at OP). It's all about keeping that pizzazz no matter what.
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Old 12-26-2014, 09:19 PM
 
1,013 posts, read 908,012 times
Reputation: 489
for men before age 30-40- perhaps

men do not want to look too young early on
because women mainly find 30 year old men in their prime to be most attractive.

if you are 30 and look 20s women find it not so good actually.
especially at 30 you want 25 year old women but you look too young for them because at 30 you look early 20's.

I have this type of face and body...
I find it a curse more than a blessing at times.

I always have to lie or let them guess my age.

then they guess from 20,21,22,23,24,25 etc and go all the way to 30 even.
then I say you guessed everything so whats the point sorry.

Brrr. no answer then.

Even when I tell them my true age they are really surprised.
like wow you don't look it...

especially since I know I look like I am still in high school sometimes.
Some people think I am still early in college.

Yes pretty much a curse.
You do not get taken seriously because of it.

for men it would be best to be 40s and look 30s. though

but if you are 30s looking like you are 18-22 years old...
oh boy it's going to be really hard.

and you feel bad because society is going to say you are a pedophile when in fact
the women are the ones whom approached you not you to them....

like...I didn't even want to or try...

while the older women in 25 range for 30s would ignore you because you look younger than them...

It's a curse for men until mid 30-40 years old

(but are men in 30s looking like 20s really in mid life crisis when they never reached mid life because of their youthful look?
they never experienced 20s-30's because of their face/younger look)

but for women looking young is a blessing though no doubt.

so women do not ask a guy their age if they look young.
thanks we are sensitive too.

We know you want older looking guys.
unless they are 50s acting like 30s.

if we are 30s that look 20s
or 20s that look 18
don't ask tyvm
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Old 12-26-2014, 09:59 PM
 
Location: Earth
4,575 posts, read 5,175,502 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by gen811 View Post
for men before age 30-40- perhaps

men do not want to look too young early on
because women mainly find 30 year old men in their prime to be most attractive.

if you are 30 and look 20s women find it not so good actually.
especially at 30 you want 25 year old women but you look too young for them because at 30 you look early 20's.

I have this type of face and body...
I find it a curse more than a blessing at times.

I always have to lie or let them guess my age.

then they guess from 20,21,22,23,24,25 etc and go all the way to 30 even.
then I say you guessed everything so whats the point sorry.

Brrr. no answer then.

Even when I tell them my true age they are really surprised.
like wow you don't look it...

especially since I know I look like I am still in high school sometimes.
Some people think I am still early in college.

Yes pretty much a curse.
You do not get taken seriously because of it.

for men it would be best to be 40s and look 30s. though

but if you are 30s looking like you are 18-22 years old...
oh boy it's going to be really hard.

and you feel bad because society is going to say you are a pedophile when in fact
the women are the ones whom approached you not you to them....

like...I didn't even want to or try...

while the older women in 25 range for 30s would ignore you because you look younger than them...

It's a curse for men until mid 30-40 years old

(but are men in 30s looking like 20s really in mid life crisis when they never reached mid life because of their youthful look?
they never experienced 20s-30's because of their face/younger look)

but for women looking young is a blessing though no doubt.

so women do not ask a guy their age if they look young.
thanks we are sensitive too.

We know you want older looking guys.
unless they are 50s acting like 30s.

if we are 30s that look 20s
or 20s that look 18
don't ask tyvm
I am a woman, and I hate my looks. I am in my mid 20s. But apparently, I look 15.

1. When getting my nails done, the lady offered wine to all the women there. No problem. But me, she needed to see ID for.
2. When repair men come to my house, the 1st thing they ask is "You are 18, right?"
3. And while setting up said appointment on the phone, at the end, they tell me "Oh, be sure an adult is there when they come."

Not a compliment in the slightest. Rather insulting. As if my self-esteem wasn't low enough, to no-existent, already.

My mother, of course, says it's good. But I tell her it's good at 60, not 20. What 20-year-old wants to look like a teenager?

I am almost wishing for some wrinkles now, or some kind of distinct lining. IO think many people's faces also thin and slim down as the age. I look forward to that, always thought my face was face. Maybe that's the problem.

Last edited by HappyRain; 12-26-2014 at 10:09 PM..
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Old 12-26-2014, 10:02 PM
 
Location: Spokane, Washington
619 posts, read 650,085 times
Reputation: 1124
If someone thinks I look younger, I'll do a bit of a booty shake over it. I'm old enough to appreciate it, especially since in my teens and early twenties, people often thought I was older.
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Old 12-26-2014, 11:37 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,763 posts, read 52,766,074 times
Reputation: 25362
At my old job they were ticked that the boss hired a 22 year old.I told them I'm older than that.
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