Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
've always liked this guy I work with. We worked within the same department and got a long extremely well. We talked a lot, joked a lot, played card games during our break, etc. He always seemed interested in my personal life and always gave great advice. Honestly, I was drawn to him the moment I laid eyes on him. I felt like we had a strong connection. By the way, he's white and I'm black/hispanic. To make a long story short, I transferred out of the department due to growing tired of working third shift. Within a few months he transferred out too. Two years passed and we stopped communicating. We worked in different departments, however, from time to time, we would encounter each other in the parking lot, hallway, or meetings. We would lock eyes, and then either he would greet me or I would greet him. I always sensed that he wanted to say more, but didn't and I always wanted to say more, but I didn't. I always disguised my feelings for him in fear of rejection.
Fast forward some more. I was sent to his department to work, temporarily and I was honestly happy to be working with him again. The minute I walked into his department, a female coworker shouted out "This is Hilary. She's nice and has a good soul. I have no soul." And he just stared at me after that. She had no clue we worked together in the past. He greeted me with a huge smile on his face and asked me how I was doing, I responded, and I couldn't stop smiling. The entire day he was very kind to me and also seemed very happy to be working with me again. I noticed wherever I was in the room, he appeared. I also took notice to something he never did in the past ....he would come extremely close to me, shoulder to shoulder, and we would just stand in silence. He would begin filling out paperwork and I I would just stare at his arms and hands. He did this more than three times within the same day. At one point, it got really quiet in the room we were working in and me missing him so much, I decided to break the silence. Long story short, he was very receptive when I began asking him questions about his weekend plans and current hobbies. I also caught him glancing at me from across the room then turning his face when I would catch his gaze. The following day, he used vacation time and came in an hour late, didn't talk much, and was quite distant, or shall I say, very into his work.
I don't know what to do because my feelings for him are growing stronger and I don't know why. Maybe me working in his department is a bad thing because it's bringing back old feelings. What should I do? I don't want to throw myself at him, I'm not that type of person. I also don't want to pursue someone who isn't interested in me. When I think about the past, he showed a lot of signs that he was interested, and I totally overlooked it because I was dealing with a broken heart at the time.
He would share his meals with me, give me a ride home, joke with me a lot, and seemed really interested in me. There were also times he would come into work, and randomly tell me how he was thinking about me and also tell me how he was proud of me and all that I accomplished. Back then, I didn't think anything of it, but now ....ah man. :|
It's hard/too soon to tell with the info you provided. You need to give it more time, and see what his consistent behavior is, in order to get better advice.
But in my experience, when a man switches from hot to cold often, he's either Emotionally Unavailable or Just Not That Into You.
When a man likes you, YOU KNOW. There's no confusion.
He's putting the bait out but you are not biting. Or there may be an HR no-dating policy that he wants to maintain. He's engaged in harmless flirting, which certainly passes the time of day. Eating where you p**p is dangerous. I would walk away or otherwise maintain this distance until you leave the business altogether. Sometimes two people meet, have chemistry, and can go no further due to circumstance. This may be one of those circumstances.
Sounds like sexual tension, confused by mutual attraction and fear of rejection. Approach him and ask him to go out with you.
Hopefully it will spark a relationship that leads to that Happily Ever After that we all dream about! Enjoy it!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
