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You said it yourself that you don't date obese men.
If you were happy, smiled, and were fun to be with, I'd date you, Kid, obese or not. But...that's just me, I guess.... You (currently) look like a guy I hung out with at the end of my college years, who was also a bit overweight, maybe not quite as much as you. But he was really cute and really sweet. And he smiled. All that counts for a lot.
OP you just need a current better picture. Selfies are rarely good pix though so have a friend help you. Present yourself in your best light but don't lie--you would be with the second pic b/c that's not what you weigh now. Most people will need to take a lot of pictures to get 1 or 2 good ones--not just you. I've read that models in agencies have thousands taken on a single shoot just to get those few good ones for a spread in a magazine so why are you any different? For me, out of every 100 pix that I have had taken of myself, I've only seen one that I would consider good enough to post on facebook or a dating site.
If you like the hair, keep it--I'm a fan of long hair on men myself but I'm a lot older than you so my input on this may not be helpful. But yeah keep it and get lots of pix and then come back and show us if you want. Do get busy too so your unhappiness isn't so obvious to dates--not attractive in the least and not your best foot forward--that's much more important than your weight.
If you like the hair, keep it--I'm a fan of long hair on men myself but I'm a lot older than you so my input on this may not be helpful. But yeah keep it
YESSS! That's two votes for keeping the hair! Shave the beard, cut the hair. get a good shirt that fits, and spring for a professional photog. That's fair, it's not misrepresenting yourself.
You said it yourself that you don't date obese men.
OK look a bunch of people here told you to lose the weight, yeah sure it's nice if you do, but here is the thing;
pic 1; ur dressed up, cleaned up you got your hair in order, a nice facial expression.
pic 2; pad posture, showing gut, ur face looks like you dog just died.
if you take 2 pictures with that different "setups" 3 minutes apart from each other they're also gonna be 3 points away from each other on the 10 scale.
Look at womens profile pictures, think of which ones you like and which ones you just click "next" when you see.
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say u like the ones where the woman is looking like she's reasonably happy but not laughing, in a nice backround.(your living room or whatever with bad lighting is not a nice backround.)
Call one or a bunch of your friends, go out do something you like that is socially accepted, ask him to be photographed during/after whatever fits, where you look well-placed, and your beard and hair come off as well-groomed.
You don't need to be clean-shaved or whatever, but look like your appearance looks the way it does because you want it to. It's controlled, wanted & shaped by you for the way you like it.
By something that is socially accepted I mean avoid making the activity; drinking, gaming/other nerdy stuff, guns, includes other womens sex appeal (like a posing ex-girlfriend/stripper/model next to u)...
You want a "mainstream"-acceptable, happy(bot not laughing) photo, reach as wide audience of women as possible...
If you use a pic from the gym or something that often brings minds to certain stereotypes, make sure you have it coupled with another photo of something else like holding a test-tube in a lab or something that balances it out. In any case don't have multiple gym-photos or a lot of prejudist women are gonna think ur a meat-head, a lot of bar-photos will make them think you're a drunk etc.
And unless you're ripped and want women between 15-19 don't use shirtless pictures, exception might be if the setting calls for it like if you're surfing. We want to be guessing how her tatas really look under that dress, let the women do the same guesswork.
Always present your best self. Always always always. I can't stress that enough, but don't be misleading. Confusing huh? Lol. I would shave the beard and get a decent haircut because the vibe you are sending out with your current look is that you are unemployed or working a minimum wage job. The older pic looks like a guy who is happy and actually doing something with his life.
Smile and put a shirt on. That's not being dishonest, but it would be much better. It at least looks like you care about putting in a bit of effort, and makes you look happy and fun to be around. I don't think you look bad, but geez you look like you just don't give a crap and why should anyone want to date someone with an attitude like that? I mean, if you don't give a sh** why should anyone else? And that's what you come across as in the first one. I have no issue with the hair, facial or what not, even the weight. My husband is big like you, so I have no problem with that. But the look on your face and your stance and the no-shirt just says "I don't care, I can't even bother to make an effort with my profile picture" so it gives the attitude that you care about nothing else and it's not going to attract anyone fun or worthy.
I'll tell ya right now I don't even have an issue with the gut. You just look pissy and down. I want someone happy and goofy and fun, not boo-hoo my life sucks. And that is the idea I get from the photo.
I cant see the older pic of you. Only the current is showing up for me. I just think lose a bit of the gut and shave and you will be fine. You look handsome under all that face fur! LOL
I cant see the older pic of you. Only the current is showing up for me. I just think lose a bit of the gut and shave and you will be fine. You look handsome under all that face fur! LOL
Ok I looked at your profile I can see your older pic now. Yeah you are cute. Like I said before a shave and a drop of the gut a bit and you're okay. U have a nice face under the fur. Remember to have CONFIDENCE too, that's a big thing.
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Shave the beard, cut the hair. get a good shirt that fits, and spring for a professional photog. That's fair, it's not misrepresenting yourself.
Remember to have CONFIDENCE too, that's a big thing.
