Is this how a handful of guys talk to each other regarding relationships? (dating, wife)
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I've been reading the relationship section in the male oriented bodybuilding forum and two known phrases I've seen from guys were (shockingly, some were even in their late 20's and there was a 34 year-old too):
1) ''You can't turn a sloot into a housewife'' or ''You can't wife-up a sloot''
2) ''Bros before sloots''
I wonder how much do they actually believe that? I would be offended if I was dating a man with that mentality. While I've only been with 1 man in my life whom I still talk to (my ex bf), I have no interest in becoming just a housewife nor reproductive machine (I'm currently paying for my classes; very much career oriented for now) and finding out that's the only reason he marry me. I'm not an object nor property to be wife-up either. i'm a person that decides if I want to be with that man or not. If I said no, then he can't do anything about it.
Secondly, if he would have his friends in first place then why is he even dating me? There should be no preferences. Wouldn't both me and his friends come in first place? I wouldn't want to be considered last. This would lead me to believe that if his friends invented a lie about me and it was absolutely false, he would believe them 100% and break up with me. I would obviously be very hurt and never want him in my life again.
I know. I shouldn't have read that but I was curious in seeing how they talk to each other. Those two phrases I would have a very hard time not getting hurt. I find it insulting. I've seen those phrases elsewhere too.
I've been reading the relationship section in the male oriented bodybuilding forum and two known phrases I've seen from guys were (shockingly, some were even in their late 20's and there was a 34 year-old too):
1) ''You can't turn a sloot into a housewife'' or ''You can't wife-up a sloot''
2) ''Bros before sloots''
I wonder how much do they actually believe that? I would be offended if I was dating a man with that mentality. While I've only been with 1 man in my life whom I still talk to (my ex bf), I have no interest in becoming just a housewife (I'm currently paying for my classes; very much career oriented for now) and finding out that's the only reason he marry me. I'm not an object nor property to be wife-up either. i'm a person that decides if I want to be with that man or not. If I said no, then he can't do anything about it.
Secondly, if he would have his friends in first place then why is he even dating me? There should be no preferences. Wouldn't both me and his friends come in first place? I wouldn't want to be considered last. This would lead me to believe that if his friends invented a lie about me and it was absolutely false, he would believe them 100% and break up with me. I would obviously be very hurt and never want him in my life again.
I know. I shouldn't have read that but I was curious in seeing how they talk to each other. Those two phrases I would have a very hard time not getting hurt. I find it insulting. I've seen those phrases elsewhere too.
It's guy talk...AKA BS. I wouldn't and don't put much stock into what men say to each other about their relationships and women.
It's guy talk...AKA BS. I wouldn't and don't put much stock into what men say to each other about their relationships and women.
Don't take it so personally.
I know but I get the feeling many truly feel that way but won't say it to their girl for obvious reason; she'll basically dump him right away. But that intention and belief is there.
I know but I get the feeling many truly feel that way but won't say it in their gf's face for obvious reason; she'll basically dump him right away. But that intention and belief is there.
The belief for most men is only there when they are surrounded by other men talking the same way.
Boys will be boys. Got to learn to pick your battles. If he treats you well and with respect, don't worry about what he says when he is with his guy friends. The influence of men who are single or struggling with dating will often times make men in successful relationships downplay their own. If you are a confident women who is confident in her relationship, you should know if your man is just shooting s*it with his buddies or he actually feels this way about you.
Why would you find it insulting if you're not a sloot?
They're probably not making a general comment about all women (just sloots) besides, guys in those forums are just ridiculous and not indicative of how all men talk.
I know but I get the feeling many truly feel that way but won't say it to their girl for obvious reason; she'll basically dump him right away. But that intention and belief is there.
OK look, I was the captain of my football team when i was 21(youngest allowed was 20, oldest player was around 35 y.o.) , and locker-room talk is good for team morale, and yes 99% of it is pure BS. Guys talking stuff about each others moms and sisters, having stupid slogans like "bros be fore hoes", "real men shave their balls with chainsaws" whatever. It's all in good fun. It's not like anyone actually believed our QB would down 30 women on a slow Tuesday...
You might love your future husband/boyfriend, and he might love you very much in turn. But if he tells his friend "bros before hoes" he's probably talking about his friend being a doormat who should man-up and not be a wuss, not so much about himself rather being with his friend than with you. (equally if his friends tell him, it means they think he should stop doing everything you say, and start having his own mind)
But the thing is when he's with his friends he is theirs, and when he is with you he is yours... otherwise he can never be a true friend to them and a true husband/boyfriend to you.
The "bros before hoes" term also applies to not trying to steal each others women, etc of course...
Why would you find it insulting if you're not a sloot?
No, I'm not but neither I'm I an object nor maid. Something better could have been ''You can't change a sloot into a respectful girl''.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
They're probably not making a general comment about all women (just sloots) besides, guys in those forums are just ridiculous and not indicative of how all men talk.
Yeah, it's like they were venting out or something since I'm willing to bet their relationship wouldn't last longer if they talk that way to the girl.
The bodybuilding forum is not a good representation of the general population (just like this forum isn't).
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