Career oriented woman with blue-collar worker relationships (hubby, family, kids)
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i would date a waitress who makes me happy over an equally educated who doesn't treat me as well. not sure it would work the other way around.
I agree and it seems that men don't mind that much if a woman has no higher education but place more focus on both her looks and if she's sweet in personality. The way J describes, he started off by saying describing how cute I was the first time he saw me, then went on to my personality and lastly about how he likes that I'm smart too. Overall, having a higher education seems to just be an additional but not the main aspect men notice the most.
It's different for women but I didn't mind that J doesn't drive nor his lack of interest in pursuing a degree. I felt there was an immediately chemistry and it went on from there. My father didn't approve of him at the time because of that reason and starting going on saying ''Have you thought about how your life will be, what will you gain out of just dating a man with no interest in pursuing a career, that doesn't even have a car, he's a loser etc'' while in my mind I was thinking ''Dad, so what, if he's at least working in a stable work, which he has for years (and still is) and isn't into drugs nor is an alcoholic and isn't cheating nor abusing me what else matters''.
If any of "you" (out there) think you are better in any way than your partner, you are in for a lot of trouble and unhappiness.
That's true but it works in reverse too. A partner can feel intimidated by a mate who is more educated or more cultured. Eventually both these things pop their head up and cause irreversible problems within a relationship. Best to keep an eye out for it before committing.
parents always want the best for their kids, which i'm sure you know. but if he makes you happy, then they tend to be more forgiving, unless the relationship becomes more challenging.
p.s.: just in case anyone thinks otherwise, i've met several servers with college degrees recently. even when they could find another job in their chosen major, many times they will say it didn't pay as much.
a woman from an affluent background with a lower class fella? never seen it as a serious relationship but have as an ons. imho, and generally, woman are very concerned about social status, "compatibility". i think it happens all the time with online dating sites, you pretty much can tell one's social-economic background by their pics and what they write. but there are exceptions to the rule.
i had a friend who was a prosecutor and she was cute, very personable, maybe just a little bit too much junk in the truck but some guys like that. anyway she had the most difficult time keeping relationships, and it think it was more male insecurity about a woman with a strong career than the guy --it's just social programming about men being providers, the "stronger person" in the relationship, and stuff like that. she ended finding some guy that was very dominant (in the macho sense) and she loved him. in fact, he pretty much told her to stop hanging out with me (and we were good friends too) if she wanted to stay together with him. when i asked her about it once, she says that at work she is hard as nails and tough, and when she comes home, she just likes someone else to be in control. i'm sure he screwed her brains out too, which probably helps. don't know what happened but i think they got engaged later.
oh one more example, met a middle class educate 20s girl (cute, avg body) who was married to a guy she met in guatamala i think. he was good looking, gentle/suave, guitar playing type.
I know of a similar situation - one of my former supervisors (female, only slightly older than me). She was a very strong and admirable leader at work - the best I've ever experienced. And just drop-dead gorgeous. But she told me that at home, she is submissive to her husband, who was a mechanic! She said she likes someone else to be the boss at home.
Well, I'm more educated than my spouse but there's no way I'd ever feel "better" since he's the one that can find a better job and I still can't find a real career. Besides, why would you marry someone you feel superior too? That's not how I work. He's a wonderful man with good values. Who cares what's on his paper veruses mine? That's crazy. Like Nokiddin, I can't find much work in my field, but he finds work in his field and does an amazing job. We both work hard and have the same high standards. We are equals at home and help each other. We've both had times where we were unemployed; we support each other. I wouldn't have my degree if not for him, anyway; we build each other up, not knock each other down. We don't keep score. We got married to be supportive partners, not compare and see who has more of this or who's better at that.
I know of a similar situation - one of my former supervisors (female, only slightly older than me). She was a very strong and admirable leader at work - the best I've ever experienced. And just drop-dead gorgeous. But she told me that at home, she is submissive to her husband, who was a mechanic! She said she likes someone else to be the boss at home.
I've heard stories about powerful CEO type men at work in charge of several hundred employees and they come home and the wife runs amok over them.... LOL
It goes both ways and whatever works for each couple......
As long as the people involved have similar values, and each respects the type of intelligence that the other brings to the table, what's the problem?
I have a white-collar background, and my ex is blue-collar. The reason that he's my ex has nothing to do with that. We just have different types of knowledge. One is not superior to the other, they're just different. As a matter of fact, I'd like the person I'm with to have different skills than I do. I don't get people that are overly obsessed with social circles or look down on a person based on a chosen vocation. I know people that maybe don't look so great on paper, but they're smart and good at what they do. I know other people that are educated (credentialed) and aren't smart enough to come out of the rain. If they're on the same page, really who cares?
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