Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
They used to study a few yrs back. They would meet up every weekend and go to a cafe to study. He even tried making a move on her. She denied him..
Today, she mentions how he hit her up. She needs his help with a math class. I tell her that ill just go with her so we can study together.
She flat out said that if he finds out about me, he will never talk to her/offer his help to her. I told her if he wanted to help you out, it wouldnt affect his willingness to assist you in the future bc of me.
I tell her that his true intentions are not to study and she knows that. She continues to tell me that she wants nothing to do with the guy in that way and blames me for not trusting her.
Lastly, i told her to change roles. She finally tells me that she wont do it bc she wouldnt want me to do the same to her.
They used to study a few yrs back. They would meet up every weekend and go to a cafe to study. He even tried making a move on her. She denied him..
Today, she mentions how he hit her up. She needs his help with a math class. I tell her that ill just go with her so we can study together.
She flat out said that if he finds out about me, he will never talk to her/offer his help to her. I told her if he wanted to help you out, it wouldnt affect his willingness to assist you in the future bc of me.
I tell her that his true intentions are not to study and she knows that. She continues to tell me that she wants nothing to do with the guy in that way and blames me for not trusting her.
Lastly, i told her to change roles. She finally tells me that she wont do it bc she wouldnt want me to do the same to her.
It sounds like you've solved your problem. Maybe.
I think there are two possibilities here.
One, she doesn't understand that it would be rare thing indeed for a guy to offer to tutor a woman at no charge unless he had an ulterior motive.
Two, she recognizes he has an ulterior motive, and is okay with that.
she is attracted to him and is just using an excuse. and unfortunately you are being needy about it because you dont want her to do it, but it's a challenge i know. give her the "listen, are we really compatible" talk. just like they do with the "where is this relationship going" talk. nothing peaks a woman's curiousity and interest in reaffirming her commitment like her SO's having doubts about her, especially since she hasn't connected with this guy yet. women typically need a bridge to go from one relationship to another. they don't want to get dumped without a safety net. it's also rough to explain to her girl friends that she's been dumped. good luck.
...and to follow up on what RPG said, she will do it again next time without making you aware.
The better answer in this transaction would have been: "Harry asked me to study with him again but I turned him down before more could be made of it, because he has ulterior motives and I like who I'm with right now (then leans over and kisses on the forehead)."
Most women understand innuendo from the start, and I would suggest it was likely she was tossing an idea out there, to see if you would bite. You did. Stop the games, her to you and you to her. I would further suggest she needs to make reparative gestures to you, as this was a disruptive comment to a peaceful relationship. She went immature and emotional; for what purpose and to what end? This should be nipped in the bud.
She's using him for free tutoring. She knows he'll help her for free because he's attracted to her, and she doesn't care as long as she gets free tutoring. A pretty unprincipled way to roll.
She's using him for free tutoring. She knows he'll help her for free because he's attracted to her, and she doesn't care as long as she gets free tutoring. A pretty unprincipled way to roll.
Hmm. I hadn't considered that possibility, but you're right. That could be it...
If you're studying, you shouldn't be taking any gf/bf relationship this seriously. It's a distraction.
Also, she is a free agent. She can see who she likes, she doesn't need your approval or opinions on that.
You either trust her or you don't. If you don't, end the relationship, it's dysfunctional anyway.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
