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Old 09-27-2013, 07:19 PM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,458 posts, read 11,498,637 times
Reputation: 7783

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Davros View Post
It hurts to know that you'll always be rejected and that you know they're right to reject you. That's what hurts. To know that you deserve it.

That's what you people will never understand about what it's like to be me.
You see thats b/c of an underlying low self esteem issue. Been ages since I've been rejected, but when it does I brush it off pretty quick, as I think highly of myself and what I offer.

Stop blaming girls and solve your low self esteem, if you want your situation to change.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:21 PM
 
3,605 posts, read 5,038,218 times
Reputation: 3348
Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth View Post
Maybe when you're 17. As an adult who has dated for years, when someone says no, you just move on to someone else. It's disappointing, but it's hardly the kind of major traumatic life event that you keep a running tally of.
You can't understand what it's like to be undateable.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:22 PM
 
2,087 posts, read 2,356,109 times
Reputation: 1527
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Exactly.

But spinning his wheels this way is probably just a great distraction from actually having to do anything to get what he wants
Actually, I've had GFs before. And I'm not sure I want one right now.

Sex would be nice, but I've never had a one night stand, and I'm not about to start pursuing that type of angle at this age.

Also, I approached a woman less than 2 weeks ago, asked her out was rejected, and am completely over it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by nearnorth View Post
Bingo.
OK. Then. I assume you're here to try and help other guys instead of being just high and mighty. So, you tell me how a guy who has rejection on his mind often can not care. And I don't mean walking up to a woman, getting rejected, and not caring. I figured that part out. I mean, not caring about all of the women you like that have rejected you in the past and the numbers of women. Cause I admit, I'd rather think like you. Who wouldn't? PM me if you like. I didn't mean for this at all to turn into a JJS shrink session.

I actually want to keep this thread going.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:23 PM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
3,795 posts, read 3,845,876 times
Reputation: 3341
Quote:
Originally Posted by Davros View Post
You can't understand what it's like to be undateable.
True. I can understand what it's like to read pointless whining on the internet, though.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:23 PM
 
Location: Milwaukee
1,999 posts, read 1,982,892 times
Reputation: 568
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJS99 View Post
I was just curious about this and thought it'd be an interesting perspective on how often men THINK women get approached or have clear interest expressed to them.

OK. First, let's define average. It's a wide range for sure, but let's say:

-White (just for simplicity, not racism)
-Average to cute face. Based on headshot alone, would get ranked anywhere from 5 to 7.
-5'3"-5'5"
-About average weight for her height
-About average body type. Works out but not religiously. Good metabolism.
-Fairly social, regularly social. Has a solid group of friends and gets out regularly.
-Lived at college for 4 years
-Frequented bars and clubs, but not a hardcore partier
-Pleasant personality.
-Has had a 'career' where she works in a 'city', goes home to her apartment, goes to the gym, walks her dog, grabs drinks with friends, etc, etc.

Let's say she is now age 30 and still single. Rejections count as turning down a guy at a bar/club, in the street, rejecting her friends, teachers' advances, co-workers, etc, etc. Other women/lesbians do not count for now.

Hookups of any form and dumping, and breakups don't count as rejections. Even a totally drunk regrettable hookup with a total regret in the morning does not count.

I would like to hear answers from GUYS. What's your guess? I know there's variation. Just ballpark it.
I would estimate it out....

Let's say beginning at age 12 an average of 2 males a day (it may be more or less than that on any given day or time period but I'll just average it out to 2) approach her, 365 days a year, for a total of 18 years.

She rejects an estimated: 13,140 males.

That's probably a rather conservative figure.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:24 PM
 
3,605 posts, read 5,038,218 times
Reputation: 3348
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post


Are you still in therapy honey? I sure hope so!
Yes. I'll quit hijacking another's thread, though. That was rude of me, and more proof that I'm basically and fundamentally a bad person.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:25 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 88,310,401 times
Reputation: 39845
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
Hmmmm I was rejected. What would you call it? Wanton of different scenery? A second thought?
Real rejection is when someone you have been having a relationship with, someone you have real feelings for, calls it quits.

Being shot down when you ask someone on a date is not true "rejection" - it's just someone not interested in you, for one of any number of reasons - none of which have to be because you aren't "worthy", or "cute enough" or "tall enough" etc.

People are supposed to have learned some very basic lessons by the time they become "grownups"

#1 - life is not fair

#2 - not everyone you meet in life will like you

#3 - we are each responsible for our own happiness, and we must choose it for ourselves

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Old 09-27-2013, 07:26 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 88,310,401 times
Reputation: 39845
Quote:
Originally Posted by Davros View Post
Yes. I'll quit hijacking another's thread, though. That was rude of me, and more proof that I'm basically and fundamentally a bad person.
Actually, I think you're kind of cute, and I would never think of you as a "bad person"!
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:27 PM
 
Location: The Puget Sound
568 posts, read 563,652 times
Reputation: 688
Quote:
Originally Posted by Davros View Post
You can't understand what it's like to be undateable.
I don't think there is a man or woman currently living that's actually undateable. Stop being such an over dramatic *****.
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Old 09-27-2013, 07:29 PM
 
2,087 posts, read 2,356,109 times
Reputation: 1527
Quote:
Originally Posted by dave nz View Post
You see thats b/c of an underlying low self esteem issue. Been ages since I've been rejected, but when it does I brush it off pretty quick, as I think highly of myself and what I offer.
That actually makes a lot of sense. I would say though, that once a lot of damage has been done, it's hard to reverse it.

I'd say I'm better than I used to be though. Sometimes it helps to get some breaks.
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