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Having been married to a man with children from a previous marriage, it's more than enough when you're attached to an ex-spouse through shared children and all that entails, but shared pets and vehicles?
Having a responsibility to children you created is not the same as having a dog, and I wouldn't want to have to worry about arranging my life around an ex/vehicle/dogs. I would move on and find someone whose life isn't so entwined with his ex-fiance.
I agree with this.
IMO, i sounds like the guy isn't sure the sacrifice of the pets is worth it to him. We all know relationships fail. If he gives his truck and dogs to the ex, andthen the OP andthe guy break up, the guy lost the truck and dogs for good.
That being said, the guy needs to move on from his ex. Frankly, if I dated a woman who SHARED her pets andtruck with an ex, I would probably not even commit long term to the person.
I can't understand how this issue would not be a problem for most people with regard to new relationships. I am surprisedhow many posts there are stating the OP is wrong.
The guy WAS engaged. Now he is single. It is time to act like it and move on. It ishard, but I have never heard ofshared custody ofpets from any couple.
I am a pet lover, and once I had to give a pet to my family to care for because my gf who I lived with was allergic. I gave up the pet. The relationship was more important then the pet. It wasn't easy, and I wasn't happy about it. But I don't regret it.
Honestly, OP, IMO you are not out of line. Very few people will deal with this 'shared pet custody' garbage.
There are country music songs that state "my ex got my truck, dog, and the house". So yes, normally, one or the other loses thepet.
OP, you have given the guy a year to figure out what to do with the pets. Either the ex gets them, or he does.
Also, smart people can see risks from miles. It's the same kind of people who won't mind writing a 5K check to the vet to treat the dog's cancer in its testicles.
Such an attachment to an animal reflects poorly on an adult. It could be a lot of things like loneliness or only child issues growing up. I can reconcile with some personal issues as that. But then, dog attachment with an ex is too much baby pup papa drama. It's bizarre I wonder if he cuddles with his dogs and watches the notebook.
. It's bizarre I wonder if he cuddles with his dogs and watches the notebook.
'The Notebook' isn't really my style, but curling up on the couch next to the fireplace with a warm dog pillow and a furry foot warmer can make cold winter nights pure heaven. The only downside is the creation of the potential love triangle that I have discussed before on this forum:
Dogs are not a substitute for human interactions, but interactions with dogs (or other pets) can be very special themselves. I am not really interested in a woman that wants to deny me that relationship due to her own insecurity.
It is time to act like it and move on. It ishard, but I have never heard
ofshared custody ofpets from any couple.
My nephew and his ex shared custody of their dog until his death. It worked out fine. As far as I know no ones current gf/bf had a problem with it. My nephew has been in a LTR that just ended. He is still friends with his ex dogging momma and I am hoping they reunite.
yeah it sucks yeah it gets in the way but everyone has baggage or issues, these are his. you expect him to either tell the ex the dogs are his and she cant see them, or you expect him to just give up and not see his dogs.
you dont seem like a dog person so maybe you wont understand this but to me my dogs are my family as well. would you want to be with someoen who doesn't have loyalty and will dump his dogs just because someone says so?
he came into this relationship with coowning dogs. you knew this. this is your issue not his. if it makes you more comfortable he not drop them off alone then bring that up but to say get rid of your dogs makes you the bad person not him
People attached to their pets "this much" are not capable of being in a strong human relationship because they always place the human one at the second rung.
A "grown" man sharing "dogs" with an ex is completely lame and ridiculous. It's like doing child support. You will never be able to connect with the man like the connection he has with the other woman.
someone who is willing to dump a pet who's been friend and family for YEARS for someone who came into their life less than a year ago is not someone id want to be with. no loyalty to animals probably have no loyalty to people either.
I'm not quite buying this one. I didn't see anything in the OP that mentioned bad behavior by his ex or anything that should really cause stress. Even if the OP and ex don't like each other, it shouldn't be that big of an issue for her to go another room or go for a run while the ex is over.
If the boyfriend is real, he should probably find someone else.
BUT he is still sharing his 2 dogs he got with his ex-fiance from 3 years ago. I am NOT ok with this!! I have made this EXTREMELY clear, that if this doesn't change, that it will cause detrimental problems to our relationship;
I find it curious that this is so upsetting to you. Is there something to this story that you're not telling us? Plenty of people are friends with or at least on good terms with their exes and see them sometimes. Heck, lots of people share custody of children with their exes, which as you may know is more involved than sharing dogs.
Are you afraid they're going to get back together? If so, that's more of a problem of lack of trust in the relationship than anything. If not, there shouldn't be a problem. Either way, it's not really about the dogs.
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I wonder if he cuddles with his dogs and watches the notebook.
