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oh my gosh this does not describe me at ALL. I am a full time student with an internship and a job and 3 kids. I go out ON OCCASION. I am not even looking to jump into a relationship or anything. I have been through a lot this year and I just want an old fashion type date, for my birthday. Why am I getting so much crap for that?
Getting a "fine ass man" who has his "sh*t together" is going to be hard with three kids. Most men who have options are not going to want to deal with a woman who has kids.
Getting a "fine ass man" who has his "sh*t together" is going to be hard with three kids. Most men who have options are not going to want to deal with a woman who has kids.
Ok so I am a recently separated (5 months). I have read some things on here a while back but never posted. So I very approachable, perhaps to a fault. I smile and talk to people in the street or anywhere. I have been told Im very pretty and a lot of fun, Im hard working and smart, I'm honest and very loving. I have met a few guys since I moved out but they are literally losers! I mean one of them stole stuff from me and the others all had serious issues or never called after getting my number. Guys will buy me drinks if I go out but they just act super sleazy after a bit. One thing I noticed when I am going through my day in the city is that the guys who seem to have their **** together wont strike up a conversation. They may smile back but they don't ask for my number, though I would love to give it to them! If I approach a guy it seems like they think Im easy or something. So Im not sure what to do. I just bought a new dress, it looks great on me. My birthday is in one week and all I want is a fine ass man to take me to the movies and be a gentleman about it! What should I do?
I assume your a Millennial. Get used to it. Actually, I see this as common these days of people anywhere from 20-50. Best you can do is to be picky and don't settle for people who don't have their act together.
If you were a guy you would have already be bombarded with "you are still married." Not that I agree with that because I don't. Every situation is different and I do think there is such a thing as broken beyond repair.
But maybe you should take a break and reassess. Your call, obviously.
I'll have you know I was the first to point that out... so it's been said (although not bombarded).
OP, being married as a stigma isn't about men thinking they will be taking care of you or any of that stuff... It's that you are not available in their minds. Like another poster said, married is married.
To many, you are still married and therefore someone else's wife... or they figure you are on the rebound. A man who wants to use you won't have any issue with this... and maybe some men who really do see you as a potential relationship might not care. But I would think a good number of "good decent" men will care. Whether it's their moral code or the fact that they don't want to be "the other man" during the divorce proceedings*
Just enjoy your birthday with your friends. Work on the divorce, let the dust settle, and heal during this time. Then, after everything is final and you can tell men you are truly single, then look.
* OP, I understand you will do what you want. But be sure to look into your state's laws. If your state doesn't have a legal separation (mine doesn't) and only allows for trial separations... it's entirely possible that your Ex can sue you for divorce under adultery if you are to have a relationship. It's a hard thing to do and it depends on your state laws and your Ex and why you are getting divorced, but just check into things before you go too far--just to be safe. Maybe ask your lawyer.
Because it's an unrealistic expectation. The perfect stranger does not appear in one's life on command, and on schedule. Your idea to go out with girlfriends or work buddies is much more realistic and doable.
Unrealistic? maybe so. Maybe thats why I am bitching. Its just what I'd like for my birthday that's all. My little girl wants a pony and she's not getting that either.
Ok so I am a recently separated (5 months). I have read some things on here a while back but never posted. So I very approachable, perhaps to a fault. I smile and talk to people in the street or anywhere. I have been told Im very pretty and a lot of fun, Im hard working and smart, I'm honest and very loving. I have met a few guys since I moved out but they are literally losers! I mean one of them stole stuff from me and the others all had serious issues or never called after getting my number. Guys will buy me drinks if I go out but they just act super sleazy after a bit. One thing I noticed when I am going through my day in the city is that the guys who seem to have their **** together wont strike up a conversation. They may smile back but they don't ask for my number, though I would love to give it to them! If I approach a guy it seems like they think Im easy or something. So Im not sure what to do. I just bought a new dress, it looks great on me. My birthday is in one week and all I want is a fine ass man to take me to the movies and be a gentleman about it! What should I do?
So you are still married and want some gentleman to take you to the movies?
Some men are thrilled to have a family. And I don't agree that it's something about you that attracts losers.
Losers, because they are losers, are always looking. They can't find anyone (for long), so they are always out there looking. They make up a much larger proportion of the date-seeking population than they do of the general population.
But, yes, screening them out is an important skill!
As for timeframe, I generally figure that for me it takes about a year to find a decent guy.
good lord, ok guys I did not get on here to talk about my marriage or my divorce but we are in process. He is in a relationship with the women he left me for and there is no going back. The only reason it is taking so long is because there are kids involved and we are both very parentally involved and trying to do the best thing. And yes. I want to go to the movies.
good lord, ok guys I did not get on here to talk about my marriage or my divorce but we are in process. He is in a relationship with the women he left me for and there is no going back. The only reason it is taking so long is because there are kids involved and we are both very parentally involved and trying to do the best thing. And yes. I want to go to the movies.
I say go! Why do you need a man to go with you? Go with a girlfriend? Go out for drinks. Have a good time.
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