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Plenty do. I do. Four kids, wife stays at home. Single income. But, we make wise choices: I drive a 15 year old truck. I don't drink starbucks every day. I bring my lunch to work. I don't by the lastest iFad every two months. Never had a credit card balance. Never had a car payment. Never had a student loan.
Not where I live. $100k isn't really that much for a family of 4. You wouldn't be able to afford a good school district or a short commute to most major job centers. It would be like doing $40k in other parts of the us.
What planet exists where single income households have sufficient wages to support a family?
I am on my phone, please forgive the typos.
It can be done, the problem is that it requires major sacrifice and a lot of people don't want to give up their frappy-dappy-mocha lotto-soy milk-whipped thingmajiggers and other things.
I agree, being in a place like Ca or NY would make it that much tougher.
I've got a co-worker making 100k a year and he supports his SAHM/ 2 kids.
He drives a very modest car and takes his lunch to work daily to make it happen though.
Yeah, I live a solid middle class lifestyle, I would expect the same from a potential partner.
I don't want to date a woman with loads and loads of debt and with tons of other financial problems.
I'm just too old for that stuff anymore and worked to hard to get to a decent place financially. I suppose when I was younger it was she just had to "show up" and that was enough.
Not anymore, at least if I were to be single again.
Sure it can be done if you live in a low COL area and don't mind not saving more than 20-25% of your gross income. Also, depending on how many kids you have and how far apart age wise they are spaced, you might have to forget about retiring many years early.
Not looking for a suger mama, but she better be financially stable and show me some good savings habits.
Location: NYC based - Used to Live in Philly - Transplant from Miami
2,307 posts, read 2,766,054 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew
Yes. The point is that love is NOT blind and deaf. Real Life is the back drop to one's whole life. Stability relieves an awful lot of stress from a relationship.
My gf usually works but isnt right now. We live together.
I make well past 6 figures at 25. Right now she doesn't make anything. After all of my bills, expenses, spending money, etc. is taken care of each month we have around 3500-4000 left over.
My gf is debt free and has zero bills. She is the most frugal woman ive ever dated. We have been together a year and a half and she never asks for anything. Often times ive told her I'll buy her a new leather jacket for the motorcycle or outfit and she declines and says she's fine with what we have. If she does get an outfit it's usually less than $20. I remember a girl I dated before her asked me to buy her a bottle of like $100 perfume like 2 weeks after meeting her haha.
I'm pretty sure we could easily have a family based on my income. I doubt we will until we quit traveling and she will go back to school. After that we will start a family (around 5-10 years) of course, that being everything works out. Seems good though. What I find funny is that if/when I do buy her a wedding ring she would be ecstatic with something around a few grand. However I'm a high maintenance mofo so I hardly doubt I'd get her anything under 10k lol.
There are plenty of men and men with families that fall under the "daddy-state" poverty level guidelines, and who receive government assistance.
The rest of your post is irrelevant. The question was are we assuming all the poor women are not poor due to various circumstances (like men) but are single (never married) mothers living off of welfare.
Yes, there's a big daddy state out there that also makes sure to be searching for jobs instead of guys as well as giving them "temporary cash assistance", etc. There are also tons of young people who heavily rely on their parents well into their 30s. But that's not the point. I've argued about state-funded social engineering which funds single moms. You can't have a single father without one mother opting to bring that child to this life - it's her choice only in front of law and not even state (taxpayers) that will pay for it has no say in her decision, much less the father. Second part is that mothers gain custody by default, thing that you'll once again pretend stupid even though it's obvious. Third, courts will almost NEVER award primary custody to an unemployed father, believe it or not, it's extremely rare even when he's the stay-at-home father. We've been through all this and you guys just disregard the obvious - there's a huge social engineering which has been backed by laws and huge advertisement and you pretend deaf and blind. I know what's the main response and why you mentioned single fathers without using a second thought - because you're a woman and when someone, especially a guy like me, mentions this, you feel threatened and obliged to reply as if I called YOU out for something.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jma501
Have you ever known any of these poor women you speak of? With this diatribe I think not. I have been a property manager for 16 years. Most of these poor women work and bust their humps working low wage jobs to support their children. Welfare is a stigma/embarrasment to these women. Its not the women that tire of the men its the men who aren't interested in anything more than a one night stand but say whatever she wants to hear to get into her pants. Another thing is that being poor is part of their cultural background. Their parents were and their parents were as well. How many wealthy Ricans, Dominicans, etc do you know? Very very few. Most of those Caribbean and latin/ south american countries are poor yet families are raised while parents struggle while giving their kids the best life they can.
Yes. When I came to U.S. I went for cheapest housing because I came with money, everything was expensive at the time due to pay disparity, so I ended up in "da hood". It was "single mom hood", no less. I left the place some days before my contract expired, I've signed it for a year early when I came, as much as my working contract lasted as well. In my home country I've never had to sign any contract when renting because gray economy is widespread, this practice surprised me to be honest, but I went this way because it was seemingly a "good deal". I think that this is very common for other immigrants as well, we get to see "the worst" that America offers and we all try to run away from those neighborhoods quickly. I've spoke about it in my earlier posts and threads.
I've also spoke about promiscuous men in USA and it's so obvious and rampant and how "lax" many of them are towards family unit or towards women they date. It's another part of reality that most men obviously don't see themselves as a permanent member within a family unit. It's the result of social engineering, unless you want to tell me that this was the way men reasoned in USA in 1913 and that you had over 50% of children with their fathers being alive and living somewhere else and having fathers abandoning their obligations or trying to avoid them at such rampant rates. I'm not an American but I'm highly inclined to think that this is far from the truth. Children tend to repeat the perceived roles of their parents when they grow up. This is a vicious cycle why younger generations of women are even more rampant when it comes to casting the father out, and it's also a reason why younger generations of men are even more rampant when it comes to lax attitude towards women or their children - both of them unconsciously see no place for a father within a family unit other than a paycheck and the mother decides about that role as well.
Yes, there's a big daddy state out there that also makes sure to be searching for jobs instead of guys as well as giving them "temporary cash assistance", etc. There are also tons of young people who heavily rely on their parents well into their 30s. But that's not the point. I've argued about state-funded social engineering which funds single moms. You can't have a single father without one mother opting to bring that child to this life - it's her choice only in front of law and not even state (taxpayers) that will pay for it has no say in her decision, much less the father. Second part is that mothers gain custody by default, thing that you'll once again pretend stupid even though it's obvious. Third, courts will almost NEVER award primary custody to an unemployed father, believe it or not, it's extremely rare even when he's the stay-at-home father. We've been through all this and you guys just disregard the obvious - there's a huge social engineering which has been backed by laws and huge advertisement and you pretend deaf and blind. I know what's the main response and why you mentioned single fathers without using a second thought - because you're a woman and when someone, especially a guy like me, mentions this, you feel threatened and obliged to reply as if I called YOU out for something.
Yes. When I came to U.S. I went for cheapest housing because I came with money, everything was expensive at the time due to pay disparity, so I ended up in "da hood". It was "single mom hood", no less. I left the place some days before my contract expired, I've signed it for a year early when I came, as much as my working contract lasted as well. In my home country I've never had to sign any contract when renting because gray economy is widespread, this practice surprised me to be honest, but I went this way because it was seemingly a "good deal". I think that this is very common for other immigrants as well, we get to see "the worst" that America offers and we all try to run away from those neighborhoods quickly. I've spoke about it in my earlier posts and threads.
I've also spoke about promiscuous men in USA and it's so obvious and rampant and how "lax" many of them are towards family unit or towards women they date. It's another part of reality that most men obviously don't see themselves as a permanent member within a family unit. It's the result of social engineering, unless you want to tell me that this was the way men reasoned in USA in 1913 and that you had over 50% of children with their fathers being alive and living somewhere else and having fathers abandoning their obligations or trying to avoid them at such rampant rates. I'm not an American but I'm highly inclined to think that this is far from the truth. Children tend to repeat the perceived roles of their parents when they grow up. This is a vicious cycle why younger generations of women are even more rampant when it comes to casting the father out, and it's also a reason why younger generations of men are even more rampant when it comes to lax attitude towards women or their children - both of them unconsciously see no place for a father within a family unit other than a paycheck and the mother decides about that role as well.
You certainly like to look down your nose at others. Even in the worst places there are kind, decent, and responsible people.
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