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Why is that, then? Women come here and say its not like this, but then you think to yourself. '''Heh, unless the women responding to our posts are dating women, they really don't know what's it like to being a man who is trying to date women, so why are they saying women don't pay much attention to looks and height, when every time I look around, all I see are women with much taller men(than the male average) and much better looking -even much better-looking than the women themselves?''
Is there a mythical land the lady posters of C-D live on, where women date men for their personality and sense of humor? That's cute, because I've lived in the States and in Europe and in Australia and I notice the same thing everywhere I go: looks and height and money> all the rest.
Obviously, we all have different perceptions of the same reality. I see women with all kinds of men (married and dating). You ask a woman what she wants in a man, looks might be somewhere on the list, true. But, from FWIW, women are a hell of a lot more likely to overlook the man not being a perfect 10 than the man is re the woman. It's easy to see on male dominated message boards. Looks dominate the male requiem for a female partner. Period. Usually for women, it's personality and intelligence, then looks come in somewhere 3rd, 4th...
Naturally, there are always exceptions to anything and I'm not presenting myself as some kind of oracle. Just look about, man. Men judge women on their looks even when they aren't seeking to get with them. All of the time. It's like a pastime. Not only that, they deconstruct women by physical attribute more often than women do to men. It's like some men can't even see us without breaking our being up into boobs, butt, face, legs, etc. LAME. So yeah, I'm calling it out.
No two ways about it - what constitutes 'attractive' or 'looks' is dependent upon each individual and nothing more than that. I will say, as a woman, there is sort of bridge that women cross earlier than men when aspects of a desirability lie within a man's attitude and sense of humor will outweigh any aspects of their looks.
These generalizations of 'women' and 'men' just aren't realistic at all.
Women do care more about looks then guys do. It's a huge misconception that men care more about looks. Society misunderstands how women select men.
First of all, women have more options then men when it comes to dating, sex and relationships on average. Average looking women recieve more messages then men who are deemed super attractive while average looking men barely recieve any messages on dating sites. Mother nature wired men to be the seekers and women to be the sought after.
Because women have more options they become much more pickier. All women unless extremely unattractive have a pool of men they can date, be in a relationship with, have sex with regularly, or a combination of all 3. The more attractive the woman is, the bigger her pool of men she has to choose from, generally speaking.
Because woman are pickier with their selection they are able to not only pick a man based off looks but also get a guy they think is attractive, smart, financially stable etc. etc. Women want it all. Men have smaller selection to choose from and thus settle. Men try to get the best looking girl they can attract; its not like we don't care about other attributes, its just we don't really have the option to get it all.
Example my friend pretty much has on average 10 to 11 guys hit on her in some way a day. She has over 200 male friends who's interested in her. The man she choose out of all those guys was the jack of all trades. He wasn't the best in every category but he made 50K a year, fits her personality, he wasn't hideous, extremely street smart and I geuss really good at sex. Yep..... Anywhoos. Compare it to a guy we would be lucky to get hit on once or twice a day by a girl. Unattractive or barely average guys rarely get any attention. Unless your hugh heffner I seriously doubt you have 200 female friends who are just waiting in line to get with you. Most guys date are choose from 2 to 3 girls at a time and have female friend who are just that friends. So they just choose the hottest girl but if we could have it all we would do so. We just don't have that option.
Thats where the misconception came from. It's not that women care less about looks, its just that they care about looks more, and other qualities as well because they can afford to be pickier.
Why do most women in this site always deny messages like the one posted. That's the mystery.
Well, that was the exact answer I was looking for. Against all the evidence that is put forward by the men of C-D, a female poster says that it isn't so; it has to be like she says it is.
Look, you don't understand how the dating world works because you're a woman. Every woman has options, most men only have circumstances. If a woman deigns to be in a relationship with him, awesome, I guess, but most men aren't sexually attractive to most women. If the opposite of what I said was to be the truth, there wouldn't be so many PUA Gurus making millions out of exploiting men's inability to get laid.
This is what a woman once told. ''I'm not attracted to this guy, but I'm sure he'll find himself a girlfriend.'' 10 years later he did get a a girlfriend. A single mother with 3 kids and looking for a place to stay. I've always seen women throw themselves at men, even on a daily basis I see women approach random good-looking men and in my many years of observing Mankind not once have I ever witnessed the average woman being attracted to the average man, and I've had years and years of practice in reading body language.
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Why do most women in this site always deny messages like the one posted. That's the mystery.
Supply and demand. Why do women never carry much money with them, if any money at all? Because they make men think that by buying drinks, meals, taking them out, or by even paying them attention is going to land them a date. Dude, you should have seen how much I laughed today. I'm great friends with women at my workplace because a woman only needs to tell her boss you gave her a funny look and you'll be fired, sued, and you'll probably end-up in jail, and when I was having lunch with them, I had 4 guys next to me who were 'fighting' each other to make the women laugh, and have a good-time.
Then I felt a body part pressed against my ribs. It was one of the women. She wanted me to see the text message from some guy she met in a nightclub. She's known the guy for a week, and they're already arranging for sex later today, whereas the other average-looking guys(vying for average looking women) have tried all year to get a date out of them, LOL.
Men are divided into 3 categories; those who pay and don't bang, those who pay attention and don't bang, and those who don't give a damn about women and get laid left to right.
Well, that was the exact answer I was looking for. Against all the evidence that is put forward by the men of C-D, a female poster says that it isn't so; it has to be like she says it is.
Look, you don't understand how the dating world works because you're a woman. Every woman has options, most men only have circumstances. If a woman deigns to be in a relationship with him, awesome, I guess, but most men aren't sexually attractive to most women. If the opposite of what I said was to be the truth, there wouldn't be so many PUA Gurus making millions out of exploiting men's inability to get laid.
This is what a woman once told. ''I'm not attracted to this guy, but I'm sure he'll find himself a girlfriend.'' 10 years later he did get a a girlfriend. A single mother with 3 kids and looking for a place to stay. I've always seen women throw themselves at men, even on a daily basis I see women approach random good-looking men and in my many years of observing Mankind not once have I ever witnessed the average woman being attracted to the average man, and I've had years and years of practice in reading body language.
Supply and demand. Why do women never carry much money with them, if any money at all? Because they make men think that by buying drinks, meals, taking them out, or by even paying them attention is going to land them a date. Dude, you should have seen how much I laughed today. I'm great friends with women at my workplace because a woman only needs to tell her boss you gave her a funny look and you'll be fired, sued, and you'll probably end-up in jail, and when I was having lunch with them, I had 4 guys next to me who were 'fighting' each other to make the women laugh, and have a good-time.
Then I felt a body part pressed against my ribs. It was one of the women. She wanted me to see the text message from some guy she met in a nightclub. She's known the guy for a week, and they're already arranging for sex later today, whereas the other average-looking guys(vying for average looking women) have tried all year to get a date out of them, LOL.
Men are divided into 3 categories; those who pay and don't bang, those who pay attention and don't bang, and those who don't give a damn about women and get laid left to right.
Oh, so you want to get with those kinds of ladies. I've no expertise in giving up my diamonds to bums at clubs, but get in where you fit in, bro. I bet those goals change the playing field, goalposts and game rules significantly. I was looking for a good man. I had a few to choose from. I made the logical choice...the one who was the most settled and mature. He has his "off" days, and so do I, but we make it work because we both wanted to have a real relationship, not a fling.
Oh, so you want to get with those kinds of ladies. I've no expertise in giving up my diamonds to bums at clubs, but get in where you fit in, bro. I bet those goals change the playing field, goalposts and game rules significantly. I was looking for a good man. I had a few to choose from. I made the logical choice...the one who was the most settled and mature. He has his "off" days, and so do I, but we make it work because we both wanted to have a real relationship, not a fling.
No, its not these kinds of ladies. Most women party-out in their teens and in their 20's and then they expect to find a good guy to settle down with them. Very few women think with their heads, and even if you have a down-to-earth woman, as soon as she goes to college she's going to be flooded by thousands and thousands of men. She's going to pick the best-looking ones and from that moment on she'll only date men who are as good-looking/popular/tall/rich as her first boyfriend was. That is, until she is in her 30s, but by then, its not worth it.
Well, that was the exact answer I was looking for. Against all the evidence that is put forward by the men of C-D, a female poster says that it isn't so; it has to be like she says it is.
Look, you don't understand how the dating world works because you're a woman. Every woman has options, most men only have circumstances. If a woman deigns to be in a relationship with him, awesome, I guess, but most men aren't sexually attractive to most women. If the opposite of what I said was to be the truth, there wouldn't be so many PUA Gurus making millions out of exploiting men's inability to get laid.
This is what a woman once told. ''I'm not attracted to this guy, but I'm sure he'll find himself a girlfriend.'' 10 years later he did get a a girlfriend. A single mother with 3 kids and looking for a place to stay. I've always seen women throw themselves at men, even on a daily basis I see women approach random good-looking men and in my many years of observing Mankind not once have I ever witnessed the average woman being attracted to the average man, and I've had years and years of practice in reading body language.
I could easily argue that you don't understand what goes though the mind of a woman because you are a man. How do you know what you think is good looking is good looking for a woman if you aren't one? Or better yet, how do you know so well EXACTLY what ALL women look for in a man if you aren't a woman?
There is a study that was cited in another thread about how men who marry women who are better looking than they are, have happier marriages (happier for the woman too). If what you are saying is true, how could there even be this study because these marriages wouldn't even exists to study.
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Do men value physical attractiveness in a mate more than women? Scientists in numerous disciplines believe that they do, but recent research using speed-dating paradigms suggests that males and females are equally influenced by physical attractiveness when choosing potential mates.
In other words, people study this kind of thing objectively and though tests find men and women BOTH care about physical appearance... but men value it more. Doesn't mean that's all men care about... though. And just because women value it, it doesn't mean it's all they care about either. And not everyone cares about it to the same degree. People aren't little robots all programmed the same.
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Whereas husbands were more satisfied at the beginning of the marriage and remained more satisfied over the next 4 years to the extent that they had an attractive wife, wives were no more or less satisfied initially or over the next 4 years to the extent that they had an attractive husband. Most importantly, a direct test indicated that partner physical attractiveness played a larger role in predicting husbands’ satisfaction than predicting wives’ satisfaction.
Why do most women in this site always deny messages like the one posted. That's the mystery.
Partly because the underlying premiss is flawed. Women don't have tons of options. (Especially those who don't do OLD.) But women don't sit around obsessing about and calculating their options, either. Women just live their lives, and if someone interesting crosses their path, they take notice, and decide what to do from there.
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I bet those goals change the playing field, goalposts and game rules significantly. I was looking for a good man. I had a few to choose from. I made the logical choice...the one who was the most settled and mature. He has his "off" days, and so do I, but we make it work because we both wanted to have a real relationship, not a fling.