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We've had to move back in with my dad since I lost my job. It's only been about a week so far, but today he told me that he called his dad earlier and asked if he could move back in with him. When I asked him why he said because he doesn't want to make my dad mad by us staying here for a few months, because the room is cramped and hot, and because he hates the well water.
I asked him if this meant we were breaking up and he said no, we'd still be together. I just don't understand why he'd bother to move 45 minutes away with his dad just because the room is a little cramped. We're only going to be here for a couple of months to save up money.
I know he's not really ready to move out and be on his own, but he has to eventually. He's 21. He hates going without internet, cable, and city water. We had our own place for a little while before I lost my job and he wasn't happy to have to go without internet since we couldn't afford it. I feel like he wants to keep mooching off his father for as long as he can, I just want him to grow up. He's a very sweet guy and has treated me better than any other guy. I feel like if he moves we'll probably end up breaking up.
My feelings were really hurt when he told me this, but I'm not sure what the best thing to do is.
Should I try to convince him to stay or just let him go?
maybe he just needs some space? it doesn't mean he wants to break up, but maybe he just wants to put some distance between you and him, like a sort of break.
on another note, I personally would hate to live with someone else's parents. I have enough problems listening to my own parents, even though i love them to death
You can have a relationship without living together, what is the big deal about him moving back with his family?
I didn't mention it in the beginning, but him and I are engaged. His dad lives 45 minutes away. He'll have to drive 2 hours to work every day and 2 hours back. He works nights (10 pm - 7 am) and sleeps all day. I'll be starting school soon as well as working. I just don't see us staying as close as we are if I'll hardly ever get to see him. All the time you hear about couples breaking up/divorcing because of distance. It's going to be hard to have any quality time to keep our relationship strong if he's so far away and we're both busy as heck.
We had a talk a little bit ago and decided that he'll move back in with his dad in about a month. I just don't see this ending well for our relationship. He thinks we'll be fine, but I know the strain distance can put on a relationship.
I didn't mention it in the beginning, but him and I are engaged. His dad lives 45 minutes away. He'll have to drive 2 hours to work every day and 2 hours back. He works nights (10 pm - 7 am) and sleeps all day. I'll be starting school soon as well as working. I just don't see us staying as close as we are if I'll hardly ever get to see him. All the time you hear about couples breaking up/divorcing because of distance. It's going to be hard to have any quality time to keep our relationship strong if he's so far away and we're both busy as heck.
We had a talk a little bit ago and decided that he'll move back in with his dad in about a month. I just don't see this ending well for our relationship. He thinks we'll be fine, but I know the strain distance can put on a relationship.
Your desperation is very unbecoming.
And trying to justify it by saying this is all about how "couples break up and divorce because of distance" is really pretty silly.
Let the BOY go back to his dad.
He is not ready to assume the responsibilities of an adult life, no matter how much you want him to.
He's 21 for crying out loud.
There is absolutely no reason he should be living with you in your father's house Has your father lost his mind?
Seriously now - just go to school and concentrate on doing the things you need to do to finish growing up yourself and preparing yourself to live 100% in the adult world.
And let him do the same!
If you continue to try to fit square pegs into round holes you'll find your life is full of splinters.
We had a talk a little bit ago and decided that he'll move back in with his dad in about a month. I just don't see this ending well for our relationship. He thinks we'll be fine, but I know the strain distance can put on a relationship.
Oh, and if living apart means the relationship doesn't "end well" that's because it was never going to end well anyway.
I know it's hard for you to see that right now, but I'm trying to help you stretch and grow here by telling you the truth.
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Has your father lost his mind?
