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Old 10-21-2013, 04:12 PM
 
13,513 posts, read 19,188,633 times
Reputation: 16577

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mtbornnard View Post
In my honest opinion, some women need to get over themselves. When I approach a woman to talk to her, I just want to talk and I'm only being friendly. I never bring up sex at all. I offered to help a woman with a paper in my college class she accepted my help. She then said "I won't have sex with you." I looked at her with a wtf look. I said "I'm just being friendly to you and helping you, get over yourself." Seriously, why do most women think this way? Did it ever occur that some men are just being friendly to you? When I'm being friendly to a woman, that's it.
When she said "I won't have sex with you" she made it very obvious just how ignorant she really is. I'd hope that wasn't the norm...no matter whether other men who've helped her out expected it or not. She was wrong to judge you, and say what she did...her loss, maybe your luck.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:15 PM
 
17,869 posts, read 20,929,537 times
Reputation: 13948
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
Maybe her reply was inappropriate, but really: Was she that far off the mark? I've been having a few car problems over the past two months. Two different guys volunteered to help me with temporary transportation while my car was in the shop, twice. In the course of their helping me, both have brought up the possibility of us dating and becoming boyfriend and girlfriend...which at least in this society we live in will probably lead to the expectation of sex on the part of the man. TWO. In a row? And yet women would be blasted for generalizing and assuming this is what men want? Actually, I miscounted. it was THREE in a row.

Look, if a woman is standing around in a public place minding her own business and a guy crosses the room, the parking lot, dance floor or whatever to meet a woman, he had some reason for approaching her when he thought to do it. If it was friendship only, he would probably wait until she walked by him, instead of going over to her. Men don't go through all that and put themselves out there just to say "Hi how are ya" so just be real about it! Women assume men want something when they do this.
if I see a person who needs a hand, whether it be man or woman, and i am able to help, I'm going to try to help that person, and I've never asked for anything in return except for a thank you.

I have been offered money
I have been offered discounts
I have been offered items

I have turned all of them down-save for one thing, and that one thing is a thank-you. So yes, whenever a woman makes an ASSumption that I expect her to play with my ding-a-ling in return, it pisses me the hell off.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:18 PM
 
5,121 posts, read 6,773,358 times
Reputation: 5833
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liberty2011 View Post
Because of bad experiences with other guys who do have that expectation if they do anything for a woman?
I think this may very well be the case and I think you hit the nail on the head for the reason why... however, even if she thought that, people need to stop and think what comes out of their mouths. Saying something like that to the OP was rather rude and uncalled for. Maybe if he started hitting on her or making a pass, I could see it. But just helping? Some guys just like to help--it's in their nature.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:51 PM
 
322 posts, read 502,836 times
Reputation: 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by purehuman View Post
When she said "I won't have sex with you" she made it very obvious just how ignorant she really is. I'd hope that wasn't the norm...no matter whether other men who've helped her out expected it or not. She was wrong to judge you, and say what she did...her loss, maybe your luck.
How sad is it that I can't even be friendly to a woman without her thinking I want to get into her pants.
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Old 10-21-2013, 04:55 PM
 
2,758 posts, read 4,939,821 times
Reputation: 3014
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mtbornnard View Post
I was just about to ask this LOL
And of course....









Crickets.......
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Old 10-21-2013, 05:00 PM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,941,923 times
Reputation: 20083
Quote:
Originally Posted by AverageGuy2006 View Post
[/b]

In your opinion, if a woman does the same as the bolded, can a guy assume she wants him sexually ?
A guy can do whatever he wants to do.
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Old 10-21-2013, 05:31 PM
 
855 posts, read 1,378,610 times
Reputation: 930
Quote:
Originally Posted by RogersParkGuy View Post
Because they've learned from experience that men almost never go out of their way to help or befriend women unless they have a romantic and/or sexual motive. I mean, almost never. If you really are being "just friendly," then you are in a very small minority.
Not necessarily true, definitely not always but I can understand what your saying and where you are coming from based on what I've heard from women. I think you're generalizing this in the modern times because the dot.com age IMO has grossly affected how we socialize with people.

For me, it really depends on the woman in question because I actually go out of my way to be extra helpful to pregnant women, seniors and grandmas, disabled women and those ladies who just need a mans helping hand without me expecting anything return. Doesn't matter the setting or time of day. A woman in need is a woman in need. I will offer my assistance however it is needed to facilitate within reason.

Women who are constantly reminded of their good looks are more likely to shout out the no-sex nonsense and put up a screen in order to protect their sexuality from a helpful guy. Some women hold this arrogance and ignorance very close to themselves thinking that every guy wants a piece if he offers to help her with something. It's a real diva attitude that I find sad and pathetic with some women.

Where I come from and how I was raised, at one time there was no such thing as a very small minority of guys who are helpful and friendly to women without expecting anything. If you were raised that way, you just know better as a guy. It's the right thing to do. Many of my friends are cut this way. If the conversation goes somewhere and is positive, then it's OK to follow up with the woman to see if there's potentially something more.

I think some men are overzealous with their helpful ways to women hoping to get some action only to be disappointed when she has no interest in rewarding him with sex. What happens next is the guy becomes the biggest jerk, meanwhile she's shocked because a simple thank-you was't enough for him.

Now at the same time, a woman who's flirty-flirty, touchy-feeling, hands-on during the help session makes me sometimes question what she really wants from me.
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Old 10-21-2013, 05:56 PM
 
Location: Southern Illinois
10,364 posts, read 20,714,814 times
Reputation: 15642
Quote:
Originally Posted by laorbust61 View Post
Maybe her reply was inappropriate, but really: Was she that far off the mark? I've been having a few car problems over the past two months. Two different guys volunteered to help me with temporary transportation while my car was in the shop, twice. In the course of their helping me, both have brought up the possibility of us dating and becoming boyfriend and girlfriend...which at least in this society we live in will probably lead to the expectation of sex on the part of the man. TWO. In a row? And yet women would be blasted for generalizing and assuming this is what men want? Actually, I miscounted. it was THREE in a row.
It may or may not have been off the mark, but the fact is that she was rude. I think it's more civilized to at least pretend that you think someone has the best of intentions b/c in fact they may. It's not fair to judge one person on what the 20 before him said or did.

Also, in your case, I'm thinking you were a bit jumpy. These guys didn't call in sex for a favor--they wanted to date you and have a relationship, and what is wrong with that? I mean, if you don't want to date these guys you are in no way obligated, but it's not fair to assume they just want sex when you said they want to be bf/gf.
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Old 10-21-2013, 06:14 PM
 
322 posts, read 502,836 times
Reputation: 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post
I think this may very well be the case and I think you hit the nail on the head for the reason why... however, even if she thought that, people need to stop and think what comes out of their mouths. Saying something like that to the OP was rather rude and uncalled for. Maybe if he started hitting on her or making a pass, I could see it. But just helping? Some guys just like to help--it's in their nature.
Exactly! I never made a pass at her at all. I don't even hit on women I don't know.
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Old 10-21-2013, 06:17 PM
 
Location: Miami, FL
3,440 posts, read 5,695,165 times
Reputation: 2264
Women think about sex just as much as men do and possibly more.

Cold approaches are generally not accepted in American society.

If you want to meet more approachable women go to latin america, eastern europe, russia or asia.

The American media makes women think all men are potential rapists and murders.
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