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Old 10-31-2013, 08:33 AM
 
1 posts, read 3,707 times
Reputation: 10

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My ex and I broke up after 3 years, 2 months ago and he is seeing someone else now. I am hearbroken. We saw eachother the other night and I proposed we try again.. he thought about it all night but wasn't sure because he thought our relationship had run it's course and he didn't think it would work. What I don't understand is he told me he loved me still and he will never be crazy about any girl but me. He told me how much better I was than his new girl and how he likes me so much more. He told me he only jumped into another relationship so he wasn't alone sitting at home thinking about me. He also said he checks my fb everyday. He said he will always love me but his heart isn't into putting effort into our relationship because he's afraid it wont work.

I don't know how he can say all those things but still not want to be with me. Do you think he will come back after his honeymoon phase with the new girl ends? I just need some advice..
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Old 10-31-2013, 08:40 AM
Status: "serving a suspended sentence for not being a right winger" (set 23 days ago)
 
Location: Columbia, SC
7,329 posts, read 4,451,264 times
Reputation: 8839
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andylei View Post
I just need some advice.
Move on. As easy as it is for someone at a keyboard to say who has never met you, I know it's a hard thing to hear and even harder to actually do. But, seriously, if he wanted to be with you, he would be with you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andylei View Post
My ex and I broke up after 3 years, 2 months ago and he is seeing someone else now. I am hearbroken. We saw eachother the other night and I proposed we try again.. he thought about it all night but wasn't sure because he thought our relationship had run it's course and he didn't think it would work...
He should have stopped there because this makes perfect sense. It would sound like he loved you at one point and even still cared now, but that he sure and steadfast in his decision.

But, apparently he didn't stop talking....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andylei View Post
What I don't understand is he told me he loved me still and he will never be crazy about any girl but me. He told me how much better I was than his new girl and how he likes me so much more. He told me he only jumped into another relationship so he wasn't alone sitting at home thinking about me. He also said he checks my fb everyday. He said he will always love me but his heart isn't into putting effort into our relationship because he's afraid it wont work.

I don't know how he can say all those things but still not want to be with me. Do you think he will come back after his honeymoon phase with the new girl ends?
This whole part I don't get. Where there serious issues in the relationship that would make him think it wouldn't work? Or was he saying that in a monumentally dumb attempt to lessen the blow and not make you feel bad?
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Old 10-31-2013, 08:40 AM
 
Location: In The Thin Air
12,279 posts, read 8,088,043 times
Reputation: 8917
He jumped into a relationship so he wouldn't be home alone thinking about you? That is horse s***. I know it will be hard but try to distance yourself from him for awhile and find something to occupy your time so you won't constantly dwell on him.
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Old 10-31-2013, 08:43 AM
 
2,761 posts, read 4,141,329 times
Reputation: 2982
Sounds like the new girl is a rebound.
I am of the opinion that when a relationship ends, as painful as it is, it is best to leave it alone and move on.
I can't think of any couple right now that broke up and got back together and it worked.
Not from my friends anyway. I'm sure it happens, but breaking up typically means you aren't compatible. There will always be good parts of a relationship, but sometimes the incompatibility or issues are too great to overcome.
Simply put, love is not enough.
As difficult as it is, you are probably best just coming to terms that your ex is your ex now, and move on with your life.
At first it's hard, but you will get past this, and hopefully you learn and grow as a person from it all.
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Old 10-31-2013, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
33,279 posts, read 20,098,412 times
Reputation: 12992
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andylei View Post
Do you think he will come back after his honeymoon phase with the new girl ends? I just need some advice..
It doesn't matter. Why do you want a man like him? This guy cannot even make up his own damn mind.
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Old 10-31-2013, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Pa
42,675 posts, read 44,291,554 times
Reputation: 25000
You don't want him. You like the idea of what he was. He changed.
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Old 10-31-2013, 09:08 AM
 
1,765 posts, read 2,444,475 times
Reputation: 1536
It's hard when you love someone and then they up and move on. But I'd say leave him alone and go live your life because there's no telling what'll happen in the future. Just let him go on and live his life as you go on and live yours.
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Old 10-31-2013, 09:10 AM
 
Location: North Idaho
22,674 posts, read 28,709,830 times
Reputation: 43708
The guy is manipulative and stringing you along so he has a fallback position if the new girlfriend dumps him. He's done with you, but doesn't want you to move on and be happy. He intends to keep you in his collection just in case he wants to use you in the future..

Move on. The only way to get back at him is to find someone new and to be really happy without him.
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Old 10-31-2013, 09:22 AM
 
16,482 posts, read 21,083,076 times
Reputation: 16171
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andylei View Post
My ex and I broke up after 3 years, 2 months ago and he is seeing someone else now. I am hearbroken. We saw eachother the other night and I proposed we try again.. he thought about it all night but wasn't sure because he thought our relationship had run it's course and he didn't think it would work. What I don't understand is he told me he loved me still and he will never be crazy about any girl but me. He told me how much better I was than his new girl and how he likes me so much more. He told me he only jumped into another relationship so he wasn't alone sitting at home thinking about me. He also said he checks my fb everyday. He said he will always love me but his heart isn't into putting effort into our relationship because he's afraid it wont work.

I don't know how he can say all those things but still not want to be with me. Do you think he will come back after his honeymoon phase with the new girl ends? I just need some advice..
Has he specifically told you why he doesn't think it will work? If he loves you so much I would think he would be open to couples therapy to see if you can work things out. It doesn't make much sense that he tells you how much he still loves you and will never find anyone like you, but doesn't want to be with you.
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Old 10-31-2013, 09:29 AM
 
22,769 posts, read 26,212,348 times
Reputation: 14558
Quote:
Originally Posted by oregonwoodsmoke View Post
The guy is manipulative and stringing you along so he has a fallback position if the new girlfriend dumps him. He's done with you, but doesn't want you to move on and be happy. He intends to keep you in his collection just in case he wants to use you in the future..

Move on. The only way to get back at him is to find someone new and to be really happy without him.
we can always count on you to bring the man-hate
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