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Old 11-02-2013, 09:44 AM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,188 posts, read 21,012,724 times
Reputation: 22134

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Did you take the Dating Qualifying Test? That's the only way to know if you truly qualify or not.
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Old 11-02-2013, 09:57 AM
 
28,905 posts, read 46,745,065 times
Reputation: 46028
Quote:
Originally Posted by freemkt View Post
Oh no, it's worse than you ever imagined.

I'm poor and I can't get tuition assistance, I am one of those evil student loan defaulters Reagan warned you (or your parents) about. I'm paying $100/mo on my student loans but they are still in default so going to school isn't an option for me.

I have no marketable skills (according to temp agencies with which I have applied) so a better job isn't likely either.

The house in which I was living was foreclosed and everyone had to move, not my choice, and lack of money narrowed my choices to only the sucky kind. And the drunk was a laid off construction worker when I moved in - construction WAS in the tank at the time - and it was easy to assume that he'd soon be back to work. Had no idea he'd prefer drinking and burning up all 99 weeks of unemployment insurance and then go on disability. Oh and along the way he got a girlfriend who quit drugs and took up drinking and she moved in and of course she didn't have a job either so they drank all day and started fighting and getting hauled off to jail for DV.

After a couple years of the two of them fighting they broke up and he got himself a new girlfriend, but now #2 is in jail for several months and the old GF has moved back in 'temporarily' because she had to move with nowhere else to move into.

See why I hate my life?

And how does a drunk on probation with no job and no license to drive always have women wrapped around his arm?
Blah blah blah blahbity blah. My life sucks and its the fault of everybody else in the world. Blah blah blah blah.

You know why I hate posts like this? Because of their manifest self-centeredness and self-absorption.

What? You think you're the only person in the entire history of humanity who was poor? Do you think you're the only person who has been in a bad place in life? Hell, 50% of people in this forum have probably had some variation on the problems you're whining about so relentlessly. Perhaps more.

The difference is that we actually got up and did something about it. You know, dug our way out of the hole, shovelful by shovelful. Don't have skills? Either acquire some or make the most of the ones you have. Hate your roommate? Prevail on a friend for a few weeks. Hell, join the Army if nothing else. Work two jobs. We've all been there. Hell, my only skill in life upon graduation was the ability to shove noun and verb, subject and predicate together in interesting ways. That was it. And I used the hell out of it to cobble together a pretty good life. It hasn't always been easy or fun. But it sure beats sitting around all day feeling sorry for myself.

Here's why you are unattractive to the opposite sex. Your life is a freaking gift and you're too lame and self-absorbed to realize it. You have youth, health, and your entire life laid out before you and you're allowing some seriously minor obstacles to throw you into an existential funk. Believe it or not, your problems aren't that exceptional. So any woman worth a damn is going to look you up and down and say, "Wow. This guy is seriously immature. No way I'd want him as my partner in life."

And she'd be right. Those of us who are older than you have seen people with real problems. As in people with cancer. People who have lost their spouses and now have to pick up the pieces. The list goes on and on. My word. If this little speed bump has completely derailed you, I'd hate to see what you'll be posting when you have real problems. Curl up in a ball on the floor perhaps? Nobody wants to be tethered to that in life.

What's more, before you start up with the tired wheeze of "Women only care about what you earn," the truth is a lot different. Sure, there will be a few women who will chase a guy with a big paycheck just the way some men will choose women based on their cup sizes. But what matters to most women is not your position, but rather your direction. A guy who sits in his dingy apartment whining about life is one thing. A guy who lives in a dingy apartment with a good attitude and is actively doing something to better his life is something completely different. Women are suckers for that second guy.

Jesus on a minibike. All you have to do is take a break from school, find a job, throw your belongings in a box, move, and save your money. On the great scale of Problem Solving Difficulty, Middle East Peace is a 10, while this is around a 0.5.

So what if you don't have money for school? Get a job and save your money. Reduce your debt and then go back a few classes at a time. Find a friend and room with him. You do have friends right? Or have you driven them all away with the incessant self pity?

Shape up. Stop blaming the world. It's all on you.

Last edited by cpg35223; 11-02-2013 at 10:42 AM..
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Old 11-02-2013, 03:48 PM
 
9,012 posts, read 8,317,778 times
Reputation: 14429
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Blah blah blah blahbity blah. My life sucks and its the fault of everybody else in the world. Blah blah blah blah.

You know why I hate posts like this? Because of their manifest self-centeredness and self-absorption.

What? You think you're the only person in the entire history of humanity who was poor? Do you think you're the only person who has been in a bad place in life? Hell, 50% of people in this forum have probably had some variation on the problems you're whining about so relentlessly. Perhaps more.

The difference is that we actually got up and did something about it. You know, dug our way out of the hole, shovelful by shovelful. Don't have skills? Either acquire some or make the most of the ones you have. Hate your roommate? Prevail on a friend for a few weeks. Hell, join the Army if nothing else. Work two jobs. We've all been there. Hell, my only skill in life upon graduation was the ability to shove noun and verb, subject and predicate together in interesting ways. That was it. And I used the hell out of it to cobble together a pretty good life. It hasn't always been easy or fun. But it sure beats sitting around all day feeling sorry for myself.

Here's why you are unattractive to the opposite sex. Your life is a freaking gift and you're too lame and self-absorbed to realize it. You have youth, health, and your entire life laid out before you and you're allowing some seriously minor obstacles to throw you into an existential funk. Believe it or not, your problems aren't that exceptional. So any woman worth a damn is going to look you up and down and say, "Wow. This guy is seriously immature. No way I'd want him as my partner in life."

And she'd be right. Those of us who are older than you have seen people with real problems. As in people with cancer. People who have lost their spouses and now have to pick up the pieces. The list goes on and on. My word. If this little speed bump has completely derailed you, I'd hate to see what you'll be posting when you have real problems. Curl up in a ball on the floor perhaps? Nobody wants to be tethered to that in life.

What's more, before you start up with the tired wheeze of "Women only care about what you earn," the truth is a lot different. Sure, there will be a few women who will chase a guy with a big paycheck just the way some men will choose women based on their cup sizes. But what matters to most women is not your position, but rather your direction. A guy who sits in his dingy apartment whining about life is one thing. A guy who lives in a dingy apartment with a good attitude and is actively doing something to better his life is something completely different. Women are suckers for that second guy.

Jesus on a minibike. All you have to do is take a break from school, find a job, throw your belongings in a box, move, and save your money. On the great scale of Problem Solving Difficulty, Middle East Peace is a 10, while this is around a 0.5.

So what if you don't have money for school? Get a job and save your money. Reduce your debt and then go back a few classes at a time. Find a friend and room with him. You do have friends right? Or have you driven them all away with the incessant self pity?

Shape up. Stop blaming the world. It's all on you.

This response.....you nailed it.
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Old 11-03-2013, 08:29 AM
 
33,046 posts, read 22,067,502 times
Reputation: 8970
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
Did you take the Dating Qualifying Test? That's the only way to know if you truly qualify or not.

I took the NMSQT, didn't know there was a Dating Qualifying Test.
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Old 11-03-2013, 08:41 AM
 
33,046 posts, read 22,067,502 times
Reputation: 8970
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Blah blah blah blahbity blah. My life sucks and its the fault of everybody else in the world. Blah blah blah blah.

You know why I hate posts like this? Because of their manifest self-centeredness and self-absorption.

What? You think you're the only person in the entire history of humanity who was poor? Do you think you're the only person who has been in a bad place in life? Hell, 50% of people in this forum have probably had some variation on the problems you're whining about so relentlessly. Perhaps more.

The difference is that we actually got up and did something about it. You know, dug our way out of the hole, shovelful by shovelful. Don't have skills? Either acquire some or make the most of the ones you have. Hate your roommate? Prevail on a friend for a few weeks. Hell, join the Army if nothing else. Work two jobs. We've all been there. Hell, my only skill in life upon graduation was the ability to shove noun and verb, subject and predicate together in interesting ways. That was it. And I used the hell out of it to cobble together a pretty good life. It hasn't always been easy or fun. But it sure beats sitting around all day feeling sorry for myself.

Here's why you are unattractive to the opposite sex. Your life is a freaking gift and you're too lame and self-absorbed to realize it. You have youth, health, and your entire life laid out before you and you're allowing some seriously minor obstacles to throw you into an existential funk. Believe it or not, your problems aren't that exceptional. So any woman worth a damn is going to look you up and down and say, "Wow. This guy is seriously immature. No way I'd want him as my partner in life."

And she'd be right. Those of us who are older than you have seen people with real problems. As in people with cancer. People who have lost their spouses and now have to pick up the pieces. The list goes on and on. My word. If this little speed bump has completely derailed you, I'd hate to see what you'll be posting when you have real problems. Curl up in a ball on the floor perhaps? Nobody wants to be tethered to that in life.

What's more, before you start up with the tired wheeze of "Women only care about what you earn," the truth is a lot different. Sure, there will be a few women who will chase a guy with a big paycheck just the way some men will choose women based on their cup sizes. But what matters to most women is not your position, but rather your direction. A guy who sits in his dingy apartment whining about life is one thing. A guy who lives in a dingy apartment with a good attitude and is actively doing something to better his life is something completely different. Women are suckers for that second guy.

Jesus on a minibike. All you have to do is take a break from school, find a job, throw your belongings in a box, move, and save your money. On the great scale of Problem Solving Difficulty, Middle East Peace is a 10, while this is around a 0.5.

So what if you don't have money for school? Get a job and save your money. Reduce your debt and then go back a few classes at a time. Find a friend and room with him. You do have friends right? Or have you driven them all away with the incessant self pity?

Shape up. Stop blaming the world. It's all on you.

The only thing that sucks about my life is my living environment, which alternates between Party Central (with happy drunks) and Fight Club (with angry drunks).

And people half my age are getting hired for the jobs for which I am applying, that doesn't sound like a problem I can easily fix.
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Old 11-03-2013, 12:09 PM
 
16,797 posts, read 14,549,344 times
Reputation: 37906
Quote:
Originally Posted by freemkt View Post
The only thing that sucks about my life is my living environment, which alternates between Party Central (with happy drunks) and Fight Club (with angry drunks).

And people half my age are getting hired for the jobs for which I am applying, that doesn't sound like a problem I can easily fix.
OH MY GOD. Did you even read the post you quoted? What's the matter with you?
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Old 11-03-2013, 12:58 PM
 
18,429 posts, read 20,176,029 times
Reputation: 26996
Quote:
Originally Posted by freemkt View Post
By American standards, I'm poor. I rent a room in a house and have no control over who else lives here or who can come over to do their laundry (and run up the utility bills) or the noise level etc. There is a resident drunk who hasn't worked on over five years - back when he worked he worked out a deal where he rents the house and subrents rooms, allowing him to live in the house for practically free. (At one point he messed up and I worked out a cheaper deal paying the landlord directly.)

I was raised by drunks and have 'issues' regarding living with volatile drunks - especially when they have authority over me (he could kick me out of the house during one of his blow-ups). He lost his license to drive (multiple DUI) and as his GF is in jail for several months, he mopes around the house all day and rarely goes out. Since I financially cannot afford to move, I seethe with anger and resentment and negativity.

Posters in this forum give me the impression that my negativity makes me undateable. I'm sure that SOME people have sucky depressing living arrangements. I suppose that not having control over your living environment is sufficient to render one undateable. Does this mean I don't deserve to date until I get more money and a normal living situation?

You can date. Depends on if you find a woman who likes you for you she won't care if you are broke. If you find one that has a shovel in one hand and a sifter in the other you most likely won't have a chance to date that one
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Old 11-03-2013, 02:55 PM
 
28,905 posts, read 46,745,065 times
Reputation: 46028
Quote:
Originally Posted by freemkt View Post
The only thing that sucks about my life is my living environment, which alternates between Party Central (with happy drunks) and Fight Club (with angry drunks).

And people half my age are getting hired for the jobs for which I am applying, that doesn't sound like a problem I can easily fix.
You're right. So sorry.
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Old 11-03-2013, 06:04 PM
 
16,797 posts, read 14,549,344 times
Reputation: 37906
Quote:
Originally Posted by freemkt View Post
And people half my age are getting hired for the jobs for which I am applying, that doesn't sound like a problem I can easily fix.
This is the most disheartening thing of all. It means the OP is like, a 40 year old man and can't seem to manage his money or his life at all.
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Old 11-03-2013, 06:13 PM
 
Location: Gotham
1,515 posts, read 1,767,346 times
Reputation: 1890
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
This is the most disheartening thing of all. It means the OP is like, a 40 year old man and can't seem to manage his money or his life at all.
Well in that case, he shouldn't be concerned at all with dating. Looks like the OP was right after all.
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