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Old 11-03-2013, 09:25 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,387 posts, read 19,800,698 times
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I had a stalker that followed me to where I would stop for breakfast, my work (he even came in) and to places I went after work. But it was a stranger, no one I knew.
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Old 11-04-2013, 12:57 AM
 
42 posts, read 51,488 times
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:00 AM
 
25,848 posts, read 32,844,936 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jade408 View Post
I found out about the stalker business on Friday night. Didn't feel like there was a need to worry about it since we have been "friends" for months and he never initiated contact.
So, if you don't ever have communication with him, why in the heck is he even on your friend list? Remove him. Problem solved.

Quote:
Originally Posted by jade408 View Post
Privacy is likely sufficient here since i know we have mutual fiends and my permissions are friends of friends can see stuff.
And change that as well. "Friends of friends" is damn near wide open.
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:09 AM
 
Location: St. Louis
9,569 posts, read 17,119,336 times
Reputation: 13349
Quote:
Originally Posted by GraciousVox View Post
Stalking is a crime. When you are fully stalked it is as menacing as being hunted like you are prery. You fear for your life. That you equate being fb friends with a stalker as the same as you in-laws not liking you proves you don't take the term stalking seriously. Try shivering in your bed night after night for weeks because you believe that falling asleep will lead to your murder by a lunatic who can't be stopped by the police, restraining order be damned. After that you will have a different perspective on how you use the word.
I agree with you GV but we've already established that this guy is probably not a stalker--just a creepy guy who showed up at a woman's workplace and creeped out her and her co-workers and that woman was not even the OP. We're trying very hard to not use the term lightly for all the reasons you described. Based on what the OP said about him though, I would not go on a date with him b/c you never know, he might get even more obsessed with her.

I mean, there are certainly various levels of stalking--kind of a sliding scale if you will. This guy in the OP might be somewhere between a 1 and 2, my ex-bf probably a 1. The stranger I met at the health club who came to my house--who knows, a 3 maybe? The man you're describing could very well be an 8 or 9 but there are other factors too, depending on how fearful of a person you are (not saying you're overreacting, but some probably do), or which actual event we're talking about and whether they're escalating or losing interest.
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:30 AM
 
14,396 posts, read 17,284,238 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CarrottopHead View Post
.
Great movie!

They didn't harm her in any way though, if you remember, and she would have never known she had those guys stalking her if they didn't all come out at the end in a funny grand finale.
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:54 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
33,027 posts, read 19,983,761 times
Reputation: 12911
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
So, if you don't ever have communication with him, why in the heck is he even on your friend list? Remove him. Problem solved.


^^ This, agreed!
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
27,139 posts, read 29,563,622 times
Reputation: 26609
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
So, if you don't ever have communication with him, why in the heck is he even on your friend list? Remove him. Problem solved.

And change that as well. "Friends of friends" is damn near wide open.
Better solution in my book:

He is added to restricted profile. I can block him completely if things ever change and his behavior towards me gets creepy. Now he can't see anything unless I tag him. Now I have no worries about "friends of friends." Or if any of my friends are more permissive, and have friends of friends.
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Old 11-04-2013, 05:03 PM
 
896 posts, read 958,505 times
Reputation: 1283
Quote:
Originally Posted by jade408 View Post
He isn't stalking me. But based on my profile settings unfriending isn't the way to go. He isn't a complete stranger, so if he did become stalker he would have plenty of access to info.


I am on my phone, please forgive the typos.
It is clear that he isn't stalking anyone. If he were, you would delete and block him on Facebook. This whole thread is a farce.
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:49 PM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
27,139 posts, read 29,563,622 times
Reputation: 26609
Quote:
Originally Posted by GraciousVox View Post
It is clear that he isn't stalking anyone. If he were, you would delete and block him on Facebook. This whole thread is a farce.
It is good enough at the moment to hide my posts from him and give him the brush off. He stopped stalking my friend months ago and hasn't done anything to me other than send a message so there is no immediate danger. I'll likely run into him again since he probably lives in my neighborhood or the one next door.


I am on my phone, please forgive the typos.
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Old 01-29-2014, 10:05 PM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
27,139 posts, read 29,563,622 times
Reputation: 26609
Thought I'd post an update. I thought restricting on Facebook and not returning messages would be sufficient. I was wrong. I've received messages from him on all of my online dating profiles. SMH!
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