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Old 11-04-2013, 08:43 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,846 posts, read 10,735,911 times
Reputation: 9197

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jwiley View Post
I have a situation that I really do not know how to handle, but it is fast becoming a problem for my wife, and could become a problem for my son.

I am pretty sure that my son's 2nd grade teacher has a crush on me. At 1st I thought it was all in my wife's head, and ignored it, but for the Halloween party she went out of her way to speak to me, and in front of my wife's friends treated me considerably nicer and was much friendlier to me than to any other parents. I picked up on it, despite not being all that good at being able to tell when I get hit on, but I ignored it and did not want to believe it.

To complicate things this teacher has went out of her way to make sure my wife does not feel comfortable volunteering in the classroom which is something my wife has always done with both of our kids. Unfortunately my wife's friends did not miss any of it, and brought it up to my wife.Who went from slightly annoyed/concerned to really upset about the whole mess.

Now I will say that this teacher is very attractive, younger then my wife and I, and is someone who I would have been interested in back when I was single, and my wife knows it. I have also been hit on many times over the years, but usually it is someone not a long term fixture in my life, or is a business contact and not someone that my wife spends any time around. While it is a nice boost to the ego when you get hit on, I am married and have been for a long time and have no interest in cheating on my wife. While my wife knows this, she is somewhat temperamental and I am getting concerned that she may raise hell about it.

Outside of changing my sons school, I do not know what to do about this situation, as I am concerned that my son will pay the price if my wife decides to start raising hell about this whole situation. so my question is has anybody else on here been in this situation? What can I do to keep my wife happy, while not upsetting the teacher and having my son have to deal with the problems? Is it wrong to reassure my wife that nothing will happen, but tell her repeatedly not to mention it?
Changing schools should not be an option. It will turn your son's world upside down. He has friends in his classroom/school and sometimes being the new kid isn't always easy when going into a new school. I've seen it with my daughter when we moved. She was in the same grade as your son and for the first year or so it was hard for her to make new friends.

I agree with the others. Leave it alone for now-hopefully the next few months will go fast. I know it may be difficult, but would it be possible for you not to go up to the school other than for events that your son is involved with, such as a class play? If you have to pick him up from school, make contact short as possible. If she tries to engage you in conversation just politely excuse yourself, let her know you're in a bit of a rush and tell her you have an appointment or errands to tend to. Maybe the less she sees you the quicker her crush will dissipate.

I don't think you need to remind your wife that nothing will happen. Your wife should continue to volunteer unless she feels absolutely uncomfortable. If the teacher starts to retaliate through your son then perhaps just changing his teacher could be an option. A difficult situation for all, but I hope it all works out for you.
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:44 AM
 
Location: Terra
2,827 posts, read 3,190,620 times
Reputation: 3339
Cropdust her. She'll leave you alone after that.
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:45 AM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,757 posts, read 33,801,486 times
Reputation: 11780
Agreed. Just wait it out - the school year is over in a few months.
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Austin
4,103 posts, read 6,045,743 times
Reputation: 6708
Keep things highly professional with the teacher whenever you run into her. Don't be mean but don't give her any extra attention. As for your wife just assure her that the year will be over soon and tell her not to blow things out of proportion. She can volunteer in the teachers' workroom if your child's teacher is making things uncomfortable for her. If the teacher starts to take things out on your child then take action but until then just try to blow it off.
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Eastern Colorado
3,767 posts, read 4,605,483 times
Reputation: 4880
Quote:
Originally Posted by artisan4 View Post
Can you use the situation to your advantage, remaining diplomatic with all sides and just making sure you are not put in a compromising position? Perhaps your wife could volunteer in another classroom?
That was my 1st thought, that with the teacher having a crush on me, it may benefit my son as he will get extra attention, and with the teacher knowing that I prefer that he needs to be challenged more he may get further ahead but my wife is more than a little upset about the situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe the Photog View Post
What you have is a molehill. Yet, you're trying to turn it into a mountain.
Says the man that does not know my wife, especially considering she just told me that she was told 2 weeks ago that she is no longer allowed to volunteer in the classroom, supposedly because my son quits listening to the teacher, yet I am more than welcome, according to what the teacher told my wife.
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:58 AM
 
14,374 posts, read 17,205,905 times
Reputation: 11133
Isn't it sort of nice though, that your wife is making a big fuss over you?
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Old 11-04-2013, 09:00 AM
 
Location: Austin
4,103 posts, read 6,045,743 times
Reputation: 6708
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
Isn't it sort of nice though, that your wife is making a big fuss over you?
It's a negative situation with a negative fuss. I wouldn't find it nice.
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Old 11-04-2013, 09:01 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,846 posts, read 10,735,911 times
Reputation: 9197
Quote:
Originally Posted by jwiley View Post
she just told me that she was told 2 weeks ago that she is no longer allowed to volunteer in the classroom, supposedly because my son quits listening to the teacher, yet I am more than welcome, according to what the teacher told my wife.
Ohh...that's not good. Not good at all. There will be many more years for your wife to volunteer at the school or she can volunteer but just not for his classroom. If she's using your son as an excuse then tell the teacher that he may not listen if you're in the room so it might be best for neither of you to volunteer.
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Old 11-04-2013, 09:01 AM
 
Location: In The Thin Air
12,219 posts, read 7,993,375 times
Reputation: 8869
Quote:
Originally Posted by jsun556 View Post
Cropdust her. She'll leave you alone after that.
I like this suggestion.
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Old 11-04-2013, 09:03 AM
 
Location: Lancaster, SC
7,216 posts, read 4,366,986 times
Reputation: 8600
Quote:
Originally Posted by jwiley View Post
Says the man that does not know my wife, especially considering she just told me that she was told 2 weeks ago that she is no longer allowed to volunteer in the classroom, supposedly because my son quits listening to the teacher, yet I am more than welcome, according to what the teacher told my wife.
I stand corrected then. You are entirely right and justified and should take your son out of not only that school, but school in general, sue the district and bring charges against the teacher.

By the way, could you wife be exaggerating just a little?
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