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Old 11-04-2013, 09:57 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
32,981 posts, read 19,956,391 times
Reputation: 12881

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jojo2222 View Post
If it was me raising the child by myself or with another woman, fine. It's my GF that's the problem. I can barely stand the sight of her after her lying to me. Yet she'll get to keep the baby, which puts me in a crappy position since I doubt I'll want to be with her.
I wonder if you can keep your emotion in check at this point. I honestly don't think your girlfriend has lied to you. You simply don't know what pregnancy does to a woman's body and mind. I am not a mother myself, but my sister told me many many times that she was so attached to her "baby" the moment she found out she was pregnant. Your girlfriend is attached to her unborn child, which is truly understandable.

Many of my guy friends freaked out in the past after learning their girlfriends wives' pregnancy. But the moment they held their little babies in their arms, they became completely different human beings. I can never forget about my brother's expression on his face when my nephew came. I've never seen such joy, happiness on a man's face. It is such amazing experience for him.

Having said that, I cannot say I can relate to how you feel, so who am I to judge. I know you are mad, confused, perhaps a little bit scared right now (and your feelings are all justified) However, since she doesn't want an abortion, you cannot imagine NOT raising your child, why not making this a positive experience for both you and her? She needs you right now, and the last thing a pregnant woman needs is a nasty attitude from the father of her child.

Have no constructive advice to offer, wish you some good luck.

 
Old 11-04-2013, 09:57 AM
 
4,230 posts, read 6,134,110 times
Reputation: 5324
Quote:
Originally Posted by kahncss View Post
Guess you should have thought about this before having unprotected sex.
She "made" him have uproptected sex with her.

From what I can tell she forced herself on him and made him get her pregnant.
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:02 AM
 
25,828 posts, read 32,804,078 times
Reputation: 31772
Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
Takes two to make a child.

Idk why a man who didn't want children, would date and have sex with a women he KNEW was not on birth control.

Unfortunately, shes a liar, but let's be honest...you chose to Snip. on blind luck.
I have to agree with this. A woman can swear up and down all day long that she doesn't want a child...and what she would do if she got pregnant. But all of that can (and often does) go right out the window when that little stick says she's preggers. You should have known better.

Last edited by PJSaturn; 11-04-2013 at 01:21 PM..
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:02 AM
 
Location: NC
6,924 posts, read 4,919,038 times
Reputation: 7676
Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
She "made" him have uproptected sex with her.

From what I can tell she forced herself on him and made him get her pregnant.
He clearly made some bad choices, and readily admits it. But she also misled him. Whether you find their agreement repugnant or not is irrelivent. I think OP is partially venting, and partially asking for advice on how to deal with this. What's done is done, and unless there is a change of heart on the part of the wife, he has to deal with it. he knows it.

I don't see what everyone gets out of beating down the OP. Does it make you feel better? He Mod edit. [messed up]. OK, now it's time to deal with it.

I believe OP (and child) will fare better from constructive advice, rather than reminding him what a [mod cut] stain on society you deem him to be....

Last edited by PJSaturn; 11-04-2013 at 01:23 PM..
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:03 AM
 
775 posts, read 989,802 times
Reputation: 1434
Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlotte Panthers View Post
Let it be clear, im not telling him to stay with the gf, I'm telling him to man up and do the right thing, as in be a father to his child.
Which he already said he would be. His problem is being disgusted by his gf, who deceived him. Pay attention, people.
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:04 AM
 
Location: Arlington, VA and Washington, DC
23,570 posts, read 33,292,659 times
Reputation: 32128
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
Just curious: why haven't you gotten a vasectomy?
Exactly. Don't ever leave this type of thing at the mercy of your partner if you dont wanna be a parent.
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:05 AM
 
Location: Rockwall
678 posts, read 1,294,767 times
Reputation: 1113
Just imagine how screwed up this child could be if these details are ever made public.

What a mess.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:09 AM
 
Location: The #1 sunshine state, Arizona.
12,172 posts, read 15,415,687 times
Reputation: 64031
You know what they call people who use the rhythm method?

Spoiler
Parents!
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:20 AM
 
149 posts, read 177,117 times
Reputation: 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by jojo2222 View Post
If it was me raising the child by myself or with another woman, fine. It's my GF that's the problem. I can barely stand the sight of her after her lying to me. Yet she'll get to keep the baby, which puts me in a crappy position since I doubt I'll want to be with her.
her not keeping to your agreement isn't a lie, you don't know it's a lie unless she specifically confirms that she was lying when she agreed to it.

she most likely had a change of heart, get over it.

you said yourself that you don't mind the being a father part, that you do love her, but this "lie" disgusts you...

you sound like a crybaby, get over yourself.
 
Old 11-04-2013, 10:25 AM
 
Location: NoVa
18,434 posts, read 29,397,464 times
Reputation: 19624
You can't trust a woman who broke an agreement to have an abortion before ever getting pregnant but you are ok being with a woman who would agree to killing your child just because?
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