How to let her down gently and am I shallow? (men, single)
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There is something missing. The physical part is just an excuse. We all grow old and saggy so you have to reevaluate what you want out of a relationship.
To the naysayers, I have considered giving a fourth date a shot. No sex just a date.
Maybe I am capable of looking past something I don't like. That said, is this girl shallow for wanting a guy who happens to be in very good shape (while she is not)? Is she running a double standard herself.....
What problem is there for a guy who keeps in shape himself (so no double standard) in that he is not physically attracted to women that don't keep fit? If he was out of shape and had a double standard then it is an issue, certainly.
The psych problems have nothing to do with how fit you are. Actually, they are probably the reason you are so 'fit'. You need help, man.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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I don't think you are shallow. Looks are important. If you aint feeling it, you're not feeling it. Just be blunt, say you're not feeling her. Leave it at that.
There is something missing. The physical part is just an excuse. We all grow old and saggy so you have to reevaluate what you want out of a relationship.
True...but I'd like to start with a girl who has it all and grow old (and sag) together.
Thanks Timberline....I agree I've date some very hot women with kids and they still had great figures.
I really can't say what this girl looked like before she had kids.
Great. And there are some women, despite their best efforts, can't get rid of the pregnancy pouch. I have witnessed it. Some bodies don't act like other bodies. That is just how it is.
True...but I'd like to start with a girl who has it all and grow old (and sag) together.
And you're currently 40 and have been chasing that dream without seeing it materialize? Maybe the girl in this case isn't the problem at all; maybe she is the one that dodge the bullet.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daylux
There is something missing. The physical part is just an excuse. We all grow old and saggy so you have to reevaluate what you want out of a relationship.
No, we all don't grow saggy just because we get older. I may, but if I do it is my fault. I've dated some people in their late 40s and see plenty of 50 yos in my gym that are in DAAAAYEM good shape. Hard and toned bodies. Yeah, it gets harder, there is a reason I'm running and/or at the gym at least 6x a week. I didn't have to do that at 20. I do now. And, I have to watch my diet like a hawk (count calories, etc.) when I used to be able to go out for beers and pizza all the time. We grow saggy when we don't adjust for our changing metabolism as we age.
To the naysayers, I have considered giving a fourth date a shot. No sex just a date.
Don't do that! It's evil, mean to her.
Quote:
Maybe I am capable of looking past something I don't like. That said, is this girl shallow for wanting a guy who happens to be in very good shape (while she is not)? Is she running a double standard herself.....
How do you know that's why she likes you?
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