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Doesn't matter what you say or do she's gonna see through it as she is the problem. She may not have a great body as you put it but unless she's missing her brain she's gonna see through your
I'm not good enough
It's me not you
Or any other excuse you make up
You're gonna hurt her feelings.
And yes you are pretty shallow. After a while even a woman with a great body starts sagging. The companionship, friendship love and caring goes beyond a pretty ass boobies or face.
You don't deserve her as you can't obviously give her good qualities enough weight in your own mind to surpass the negative. Shallow? Absolutely. Di*k move? Absolutely. And when it all said and done, hopefully you're not left kicking yourself for letting what seems like a great catch get away because you can't get over a physical flaw that is a result of having children. Why'd you even waste her time to begin with?
Call her, tell her that it wouldn't be fair to her for you two to continue dating as you are not capable of being the man she deserves in her life. Wish her well.
Are you a guy or girl (if you don't mind revealing)? Also, is it shallow for women to reject guys because they aren't tall enough for their tastes?
She is 30, divorced with two kids. I am over 40, single, no kids.
We've only been on three dates but we both became very smitten pretty fast. After the second date she was texting me/contacting me every day.
On the third date there was alchohol involved and SHE asked to come over to my place. I initally said that was not a good idea. But she kept pushing me so I took her to my place. Sex was NOT in my plans as I didn't even have any condoms at home.
She proceeded to kiss me and pretty soon our clothes came off. Suffice it to say we did NOT have sex but she pretty clearly wanted to.
So why do I want to break it off with this otherwise sweet girl? I know this sounds (or is) shallow but I could not get into her once I saw her with her clothes off. Not to brag but I stay in very good shape and I like a hard (or harder) body. I can see that having kids will really take a toll on a woman's body.
Don't get me wrong, this gal looks great in a tight skirt and she is cute as a button. But even she said she'd like to get a tummy tuck if she could afford one.
The tragic part is shortly after our "sleeping" together episode without having sex she said, "I am afraid to get hurt again and after that night when we were naked togethter I thought I am not beautiful. He is going to change his mind about me."
I feel really bad. Of course, we've all been rejected so I've been there too. I just want to do it in a way that is nice and respectful. But also not too obvious.
Thanks for any input.....the fourth date is supposed to be this weekend.
Yeah, you're kind of shallow.
Not because you desire women with super-fit bodies (most all men do), but because you put your desire for a super-fit body above all other considerations. You profess great admiration for this woman. You say how sweet and wonderful she is. You even say even tell she looks great in a skirt and is "as cute as a button." But, apparently, that's good enough for you. What matters to you most is getting a woman with a super-fit body. That's the one thing you won't compromise on.
Don't try to let her down easy. When people say, "I want to let her down easy," what they really mean is, "I don't want to deal with her grief." Be a man. Accept that you are going to devastate this woman no matter how hard you try not to. Do it quickly, honestly and then get out of her life. If she has all the wonderful qualities you say she has, she will forget you and find someone who will accept her as is soon enough.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Electrician4you
And yes you are pretty shallow. After a while even a woman with a great body starts sagging. The companionship, friendship love and caring goes beyond a pretty ass boobies or face.
Are you really indicating 3-4 dates in a guy (or girl) should keep dating someone they aren't physically attracted to?
Seriously?
Quote:
Originally Posted by RogersParkGuy
What matters to you most is getting a woman with a super-fit body. That's the one thing you won't compromise on.
It seems he wants both. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. THere is nothing to indicate that for a fit body he is willing to put up with a jerk. He wants both. Most of us do.
Are you really indicating 3-4 dates in a guy (or girl) should keep dating someone they aren't physically attracted to?
Seriously?
It seems he wants both. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. THere is nothing to indicate that for a fit body he is willing to put up with a jerk. He wants both. Most of us do.
Are you a guy or girl (if you don't mind revealing)? Also, is it shallow for women to reject guys because they aren't tall enough for their tastes?
I'm a gal.
And yes, women that dump a guy over height also have a level of shallow - but, we would need to know the full details such as does the short guy have a terrible personality because he's so insecure about his height?
Now, please stop hijacking threads.
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