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There is generally a lack of social skills and ineffective communication skills driven by a heavy dependence on technology for entertainment and interpersonal interaction.
I think that the trend is starting from around the time that boys hit puberty. I'm only in my 30s but I remember when boys still asked girls to dances, called to talk on the house phone, wrote love notes on paper, coming to the house to study for a test together, come to the front door to take girls out on a date (and meet the parents), etc. These things required boys/young men to actually think about the girl as more than an object. Boys actually had to use many forms of communication to express interest in girls; they had to exercise social skills. This is practically nonexistent today.
I agree with the "detachment" that technology has caused.
This isn't just related to young men or boys, it's the same affect with young woman and girls....
I think what is driving a lot of the rage that I see here is that basically men feel like they have no control, or power in terms of dating. I think that they feel like women are holding all of the cards.
Yes, I think that definitely accounts for a lot of the hostility. Moreover, I think a lot of men perceive that women have somehow gained power over them unfairly, and that men in previous generation had it better than they do today.
The most important thing to keep in mind is that the rage you describe is against female equality, not female superiority. While the men who are angry believe women now have the upper hand, they really don't. It is simply that women are now, in many cases, able to treat men the same way previous generations of men treated women. That, apparently, is too much for some men to bear.
Yes, I think that definitely accounts for a lot of the hostility. Moreover, I think a lot of men perceive that women have somehow gained power over them unfairly, and that men in previous generation had it better than they do today.
The most important thing to keep in mind is that the rage you describe is against female equality, not female superiority. While the men who are angry believe women now have the upper hand, they really don't. It is simply that women are now, in many cases, able to treat men the same way previous generations of men treated women. That, apparently, is too much for some men to bear.
Okay, now, any men on here who want to call me a "white knight" and a "mangina" for what I wrote above, feel free. I don't care what you think of me, and I don't need your approval to speak my mind.
I think it's a "perception"..... that men don't have any power and that women have it all..... but as the saying goes, perception is reality... you know what I mean???
I agree with the "detachment" that technology has caused.
This isn't just related to young men or boys, it's the same affect with young woman and girls....
Very true as well. Girls/young women have no idea about being 'courted' by boys/young men. There aren't any chats on the house phone with mom hovering in the background, there is mostly just emotional-less texting. And today instead of passing love notes in class, girls are taking selfies of their boobies and vajayjays for boys to let them know they are interested. Girls are reduced (and have reduced themselves) to nothing more than sexual objects because boys do not have to invest emotionally to interact sexually with girls.
Very true as well. Girls/young women have no idea about being 'courted' by boys/young men. There aren't any chats on the house phone with mom hovering in the background, there is mostly just emotional-less texting. And today instead of passing love notes in class, girls are taking selfies of their boobies and vajayjays for boys to let them know they are interested. Girls are reduced (and have reduced themselves) to nothing more than sexual objects because boys do not have to invest emotionally to interact sexually with girls.
I think there is a lot of truth in the OP, and I think it may be coupled with a greater sense of entitlement the current generation has.
Perhaps technology has become an enabler of sorts? Those with poor social skills can now turn to tech to get social needs met, as opposed to interacting in real life that would force them to develop social skills more?
There is also a strong love/hate dynamic going on; they want sex/relationships very badly and hate women for depriving.
The thing is, I think their perception is very skewed. I see unattractive men of all sorts in relationships. Of course depending on which bitter guy you talk to it's: lack of money, unattractiveness, lack of college degree, short, etc. which is why they are not getting women.
Basically it is whatever they are lacking that prevents them from getting women.
The whole "women suck but I want one" dynamic bothers me.
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I think the key thing to realise is that in other relationship forums, including ones with a younger demographic, we don't see this bitterness. It's limited to CD and the PUA forums.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound
Women are graduating college at a faster rate, especially in the black community. Women are making more and more money now, getting to be on par with men. Women are in positions of power in the job place more frequently now. Women have more choices in men, with online dating as well. Women generally are the ones to decide when sex happens, women generally do the choosing in men, yeah, I know men have to do more of the approaching, but initially at least the women chooses whether she likes the guy or not. It seems like in the dating world women sometimes still expect men to pay and or be chivalrous, I know this may get some responses back from women saying no, that why I'm saying some and a few etc etc.
All of this was true back in the 80s, at least in the west coast cities I'm familiar with.
I think what's different now is that there is a small, but very-vocal-on-the-internet group of men who maybe in the past we would have just never heard from. Guys who don't interact with other people in meatspace.
I work with people in their 20s, and I have only ever met one guy like this IRL, out of hundreds.
It seems clear to me from these guys' posts on CD that they have some pretty intense psych issues. Some are on the autism spectrum, some show heavily narcissistic or psychopathic traits, some are just severely depressed.
We are not seeing the feelings of ordinary young men, here. We are seeing guys with neurological irregularities, who don't have enough IRL social experience and perception to see through the BS of PUA, and who take it as gospel. And who have nothing to do but sit online all day and talk to each other in an echo chamber.
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