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Well how did it turn out for you man? Did you ever meet any of these women? Did you hit it off with any of them?
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Originally Posted by jsun556
So did they end up being pretty or ugly?
The verdict is that I'm still shallow. Honestly, there was a mix. They ranged from smart, kindhearted, legit runway models (well, there was one) to women that I normally would not have considered based on looks alone. I became good acquaintances with some. We only lost regular contact when they started dating someone else. I still get emails or phone calls from a few of them.
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Originally Posted by Checkered24
How many messages did you send out before getting replies? Most profiles without any pictures tend to get ignored these days.
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Originally Posted by Leisesturm
I think what they are saying is that their profile had a picture but they responded to profiles without pictures. As if that was any big deal. Blind people who do OLD have to use their remaining senses to make dating decisions and mostly manage it alright... just saying. As a guy, dating online, I found that few women actually put a recent photo in their profile, if they put one at all. Later on, if you asked, you could get an up to date photo, but the profile photo would be 10 or more years out of date or taken from such a far distance away that it wasn't really representative. IF a woman actually puts an up to date, close up and clear photo of herself in a profile. She is an 8, or better, and knows it... ... and ... ... well I don't need to find out the hard way that such a woman is out of my league.
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Yes, that is what I was saying. My profile did have photos. The ladies I wrote did not. Maybe I am more visual than most, but it was a very big deal. But, your point about blind people who do OLD is taken. I'd never thought about that before.
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Originally Posted by WyoNewk
When I met my first wife online in 1991, digital photos just weren't posted online nor sent through emails. We did exchange some via snail mail. After her death in '96 it was a little easier sending jpgs, but most individuals still didn't have scanners nor digital cameras, so I did date a few women I met online without seeing their photos. I probably wouldn't have dated most of them if I'd have seen their photos first.
That is what I found. I consider OLD to be pretty much dating from the inside out (if you don't transition to real life in a timely manner). You get to see a lot of the quirks much sooner than later. None of the profiles I responded to were blank, they just didn't have pictures. They were usually well filled out as far as the written content was concerned. Funny, upbeat, better grammar than mine, etc. Even though people can write anything on a profile, it's much harder to fake who you are in real time. I found that the personalities behind the profiles were pretty accurate. Unfortunately (?), we are human. Personality is not everything (nor is looks). The physical chemistry created by two people has to be there as well.
If I were to do OLD like this again, it would be as I saw someone else mention in another thread - through hobby or game related mediums like chess, checkers, Words with Friends, something like that. Having said that, I still prefer real life outside of the club scene.
Just a quick question: has anyone else here that has tried OLD done so without being able to see pictures/images? How did it turn out for you?
I wanted to test the depths of my shallowness by taking the extreme stance of accepting someone for who they are and not what they looked like. I met some very interesting ladies while doing this; similar hobbies, compatible sense of humor, etc. They all offered to send me pictures. I told them in no uncertain terms that I did not want them to do so. In many cases, they really wanted to meet me. They were able to see me via video chat and pictures, but I never allowed myself to see them until we met in person.
Anyway, just curious to know if anyone else has ever done anything like this before.
Honestly, I think people get too defensive about not wanting to be seen as shallow.
No reasonable person is going to call someone shallow for appreciating beauty. That's absurd. Of course you consider physical attractiveness when seeking a partner.
Appreciation of beauty only spills over into shallowness when beauty trumps all other aspects of compatibility. A person is shallow when they put up with outrageous and even abusive behavior just because their partner is "hot." A person is shallow when disregard compatible people over trivial physical flaws. A person is shallow when, instead of dating who they like, try to date the person they think will make their friends envious. But wanting to get to know someone better because you think they're good-looking is not shallow.
You know some people are just not photogenic at all. I take horrible photos, but I look fine in person. Some people just do not like the way they look in their picture but do in person!
Last time I tried that he was very nice looking. And married. The next time I tried it he had a picture but it wasn't really all that clear and he was nice looking too. I reasoned that if a wife saw it she would probably recognize him from it, but guess what? He turned out to be married too. Never again--I'd better see his eyeballs first.
Honestly, I think people get too defensive about not wanting to be seen as shallow.
No reasonable person is going to call someone shallow for appreciating beauty. That's absurd. Of course you consider physical attractiveness when seeking a partner.
This is very true. Maybe he doesn't have to be drop dead gorgeous but his looks need to appeal to me or it ain't happening. Fortunately I see a broad range of "types" that I'm attracted to.
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